NWR: Allergic to MIL's Gifts

Nickie431

My MIL loves Bath & Body Works products and has occasionally given me some, which I've appreciated, because they do smell delicious and that's not an area I indulge myself.  However, an allergist I've started seeing has recommended I avoid any scented products, especially on my skin.  How do I politely mention to her that I'm no longer able to use BBW products without seeming like I'm assuming she's planning future gifts?  And would it be appropriate to offer my partially-used bottles of lotions and body washes to her so that someone can enjoy them rather than just throwing them away?

Avion22

I think it's okay to bring up in casual conversation.  "I'm really bummed that I can't use that lotion anymore, I really love how it smells!  But the allergist thinks I should lay off to see if it helps my skin."  

rlavach

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_nwr-allergic-to-mils-gifts?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:71d8418b-6ea2-4734-8dd9-d6f90296d02bPost:c19085a5-27fa-40be-b46e-45fa2cea1dda">Re: NWR: Allergic to MIL's Gifts</a>:
[QUOTE]I think it's okay to bring up in casual conversation.  "I'm really bummed that I can't use that lotion anymore, I really love how it smells!  But the allergist thinks I should lay off to see if it helps my skin."  
Posted by Avion22[/QUOTE]
^This. I wouldn't try to give it back, though. I don't think that would come off right, even though you have the right intentions. Do you have a friend/sister that wouldn't mind the hand-me-down bottles? <div>
</div><div>I'm not sure how strong your allergies are, but if you have any body sprays, you can use them as room spray. That's what I do with several of mine. </div>

Blue & White

Make sure you're careful when you bring it up in casual conversation.  You don't want your MIL to spend hours trying to find a "hypoallergenic" body wash that may or may not still affect you.

My BF, however, can ONLY use Dove soap as he breaks out in hives with almost every other kind...and everyone in his life is fully aware of this.  So I'd imagine it's kinda the same - when we go to his grandparents, they usually have Dove for us, even though we tend to bring it with us as well, lol.  Overprepared, obviously.

lauraanne9

She is your MIL so likely you talk often and about your life.  I think I would bring up in casual conversation, without any mention of the BBW products, that you are seeing an allergist.  She will ask why, and I would tell her the symptoms that led you to see the doctor in the first place (at least the "socially acceptable" symptoms) and let the conversation flow naturally, just as it has done here.  If you take a "gift concern" out of the picture, you may avoid the issue in the future.  I would also wait to directly address it, unless she asks or comments, until you receive another unusable gift from her.  You never know, she may understand without you saying anything directly.

Simply Fated

I agree with pps that you could work into into conversation about how you just found out that you're allergic to some body products and the doctor suggested you lay off the BBW stuff for awhile.

I definitely wouldn't offer to give it back to her, though. Avoid using the products for awhile and see if your skin gets better. I mean, it might not be the BBW doing it. I react to some soaps, but not to BBW, so you never know. If it is the BBW stuff, see if you have a friend that might want some of the unused/mostly unused stuff and toss the rest.

Cuss10

Just as a thought, I too am allergic to BBW products. I apply my allergy approved lotion, allow it to soak in, apply more, let it soak in and then a very small amount of the BBW lotion so I get the scent of it, but it's actually just laying on top of my other lotion.

harpsdesire

Personally I wouldn't give the gifts back but just offer them to my friends so they won't be wasted.  It can seem a little insulting to get a gift given back to you even if the intentions are good.