Wedding Etiquette Forum

RSVP Cards/Food choices

I'm finalizing the design of our invites, etc. and am stuck on the RSVP cards. 

1. We're having a buffet and don't need menu choices for everyone, but we do need to know if children are eating the buffet or want a kids plate (chicken fingers/fries). There are only about 3 families with young kids invited, so I'm thinking of leaving that off the card, and just calling to ask when/if they RSVP "yes". Does that sound ok?

2. I know we have several guests with special diet restrictions/allergies and there are also about a dozen guests that neither FI nor I have met before (parent's friends). Do you think its ok to put something like "Please indicate any special dietary needs/allergies below"?

Thoughts?

Re: RSVP Cards/Food choices

  • mica178mica178 member
    5000 Comments Fourth Anniversary 5 Love Its
    both sound fine to me.
  • 1, yes, 2, not sure. It seems like people with food allergies would let the host know without being asked?  
  • I wouldn't include the kids' meal or the note about special dietary needs. I'm assuming your buffet will have a selection that should accommodate most "special needs" and if someone has a need that goes beyond that, I'd guess they're used to attending affairs where they either let the host know or plan to eat before.
  • 1--definitely fine

    2--accomodate the people that you know about, and ask your parents about their friends.  I would be hesitant to put something like "please let us know about any food allergies or dietary concerns" because then you might end up with cards back saying "I really don't like eggplant, parmesan cheese, and olives" instead of actual allergies/dietary issues. 
  • I am also doing a line like "Please list any dietary restrictions on reverse."  I know of a couple of vegetarians and one person with a dairy allergy among my friends, and I want them accommodated correctly.  And if I do that, I want to make sure that my parent's guests and FIL's guests are similarly accommodated and I just don't know those people well enough to be aware of all the dietary restrictions.

    If someone writes something ridiculous (one at my cousin's wedding said they would like whole-week ziti with a side of broccoli), I'll address that individually by explaining that unless there are allergies or religious restrictions, people are being provided with the standard selection.
  • We asked for people to list on an area of our wedding website any allergy issues.  We didn't have anyone tell us food preferences.  We ended up with three shellfish allergies, 2 vegetarian and gluten free people, a few gluten free meals and some vegetarians.  We were able to accommodate everyone but it was great to know in advance so that the chefs were all prepared.  I think it makes sense to either ask on the back of the RSVP card or have them answer on the website.
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