Are any of my ideas tacky, weird or rude?

shoegal715

Brutal honesty please! 

- Not wanting the BMs to sleep over night before the wedding.  I just want it to be me and fiance, but for some reason it seems like every bride stays at her parents with her BMs. Is that rude? 

- Friday wedding at 5pm 

- cucpakes, not cake 

- DJ at my ceremony, not live music 

- At the reception, have the Dj dedicate a song and have all of the married couples on the dance floor for a dance 

- 1 hour break between ceremony and reception for pictures. Ceremony and reception are in the same location, and the cocktails and canapes are on the patio for guests 

- me not giving a speech at my wedding. FH will do it, but I just really don't want to have to worry about saying a long winded speech

- no receiving ling - table visits 

- sweetheart table - not sitting with our WP

- no STDs 

- no veil 

- leaving for honeymoon the day after the wedding when OOT guests are still here 

- no garter toss, bridal party dance, or kissing games

- there is a hotel on site where many guests are staying (because it's a friday, we took the room discount and the rooms are less than $50) and we don't want to stay with our guests. Our flight for our honeymoon leaves at 11am the next day, so we want to take a cab after the reception and stay at at the hotel by the airport 

- No RD - rehearsal at 7pm day before, and then going to a bar where we will buy beer, pop, other drink, and pub food for the 20 people invited 

DramaGeek

The only thing I'd take issue with as a guest is a 5 pm wedding.  Either you know your guests can make it, or you're going to have a lot of complaints and/or no RSVPs.  As a guest, I'd prefer to see a 7 or 7:30 ceremony on a Friday evening to give me time to get home, change, have a bite to eat, etc.  I get off earlier than most (4pm) and I wouldn't be able to get to your wedding on time, appropriately dressed, unless your ceremony was close to where I work and I took a change of clothes.  Also, the ceremony is dinner time-ish for a lot of people.  Even if it's only a 10 minute ceremony and starts on time, you're still asking them to wait another hour for dinner.  Unless you have a small guest list and have discussed this with each person, I think you'll find that a lot of people will be unhappy with the start time and will either come but complain about it or won't be able to come at all.  Unless that's what you're after, then go for it!  I remember a girl on the knot years ago who decided to get married at 9:30 am on a Thursday specifically so no one would come!

shoegal715

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_of-ideas-tacky-weird-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:760c810f-ba1a-40c7-8d03-4773edaa553ePost:bafe5f26-7ac5-470a-8dfb-0bcf3c5f083e">Re: Are any of my ideas tacky, weird or rude?</a>:
[QUOTE]The only thing I'd take issue with as a guest is a 5 pm wedding.  Either you know your guests can make it, or you're going to have a lot of complaints and/or no RSVPs.  As a guest, I'd prefer to see a 7 or 7:30 ceremony on a Friday evening to give me time to get home, change, have a bite to eat, etc.  I get off earlier than most (4pm) and I wouldn't be able to get to your wedding on time, appropriately dressed, unless your ceremony was close to where I work and I took a change of clothes.  Also, the ceremony is dinner time-ish for a lot of people.  Even if it's only a 10 minute ceremony and starts on time, you're still asking them to wait another hour for dinner.  Unless you have a small guest list and have discussed this with each person, I think you'll find that a lot of people will be unhappy with the start time and will either come but complain about it or won't be able to come at all.  Unless that's what you're after, then go for it! <strong> I remember a girl on the knot years ago who decided to get married at 9:30 am on a Thursday specifically so no one would come!</strong>
Posted by DramaGeek[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>That's almost me, although not that crazy. I've always wanted a small intimate wedding, but since my parent's are footing the bill, that's not exactly a reality.  My family is all teachers so summer weddings on a Friday are nothing to them. It's important that my family will be there, and they all will.</div><div>
</div><div>If my cousin's boyfriend, one of fiance's random football friends or my dad's employee can't come because it's a Friday, then it's for the best!  </div><div>
</div><div>You make a good point about being hungry though. Then again, I hope people will plan lunch accordingly. Ceremony 5 - 5:30 (at most), and dinner at 7 with canapes are free booze in between.</div><div>

</div>

LD1970

Not wanting the BMs to sleep over night before the wedding.  I just want it to be me and fiance, but for some reason it seems like every bride stays at her parents with her BMs. Is that rude?  As a bridesmaid, I've never stayed with the bride and/or her family the night before the wedding, and as a bride I don't see the point in having them stay with me.  I live on my own anyway, why would I even stay at my mother's house?

Friday wedding at 5pm  As a guest, this would be tough for me and I'd grumble a bit, but if we were close, I'd leave work early to be there.  I read your follow up, and I think it's fine in your case.

cucpakes, not cake  Totally fine.  It's a new trend (i.e. not from our parents' era), so I can see moms looking at it weirdly, but it's fine.

DJ at my ceremony, not live music  Same as my wedding.

At the reception, have the Dj dedicate a song and have all of the married couples on the dance floor for a dance  Sounds really sweet.

1 hour break between ceremony and reception for pictures. Ceremony and reception are in the same location, and the cocktails and canapes are on the patio for guests  I imagine the cocktail hour will be that hour "between" the ceremony and reception, and if so, that's totally fine.  It's normal, even.

me not giving a speech at my wedding. FH will do it, but I just really don't want to have to worry about saying a long winded speech No speeches by bride or groom at my wedding, and I've never seen a speech from a bride or groom at the many weddings I've attended.

no receiving ling Same as my wedding.  And I hate receiving lines as a guest too.

table visits Totally normal.

sweetheart table - not sitting with our WP Totally normal, and the most common way I've seen it done.  And the same as at my wedding.

no STDs  Totally fine if you don't feel you need them.

no veil  This is and should be completely up to you.  Everyone has his/her own style, and you shouldn't let convention dictate.

leaving for honeymoon the day after the wedding when OOT guests are still here  Same here.

no garter toss, bridal party dance, or kissing games Same here.  Hate those.  HATE.

there is a hotel on site where many guests are staying (because it's a friday, we took the room discount and the rooms are less than $50) and we don't want to stay with our guests. Our flight for our honeymoon leaves at 11am the next day, so we want to take a cab after the reception and stay at at the hotel by the airport  Totally fine.

No RD - rehearsal at 7pm day before, and then going to a bar where we will buy beer, pop, other drink, and pub food for the 20 people invited So it's just a casual "RD."  Nothing wrong with that, as long as you're still feeding people.

shoegal715

Thanks girls!!

Oh, I forgot a major one!! 

Drinking at my wedding.  My goal is to be happy buzzed, but not sloppy drunk at any point. Tacky? 

LD1970

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_of-ideas-tacky-weird-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:760c810f-ba1a-40c7-8d03-4773edaa553ePost:5057012a-777d-44a4-9062-fa458f41ee26">Re: Are any of my ideas tacky, weird or rude?</a>:
[QUOTE]Thanks girls!! Oh, I forgot a major one!!  Drinking at my wedding.  My goal is to be happy buzzed, but not sloppy drunk at any point. Tacky? 
Posted by shoegal715[/QUOTE]
You yourself?  Totally fine.  Obviously, you don't want to be slurring and falling down, but there's nothing wrong with having a little buzz going... as long as it doesn't make you too tired later on, so you crash before the party's over!  Don't wanna be yawning at your own reception, after all.  :D

Snippylynn

WTF?  You think any of these are weird?  I'm pretty sure you've been around here for a while, so you know better.  These are totally fine.

aleighk1

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_of-ideas-tacky-weird-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:760c810f-ba1a-40c7-8d03-4773edaa553ePost:ae8ffa06-0239-496c-a2f4-5fd6dd46f001">Re: Are any of my ideas tacky, weird or rude?</a>:
[QUOTE]WTF?  You think any of these are weird?  I'm pretty sure you've been around here for a while, so you know better.  These are totally fine.
Posted by Snippylynn[/QUOTE]

<div>That's what I was thinking. I think all of your ideas are fine.</div>

Loopyseven

In Response to Are any of my ideas tacky, weird or rude?:
Not wanting the BMs to sleep over night before the wedding.  I just want it to be me and fiance, but for some reason it seems like every bride stays at her parents with her BMs. Is that rude?  SIL/MOH stayed with me at my house.  H stayed at her place.  He was uber traditional and didn't want to see me day of.

Friday wedding at 5pm - Ours was Friday at 6 - tried to make it a little easier for people who had to work, but ceremony was outside and sunset in late September is just after 7:00 so we really couldn't go much later than 6.

cucpakes, not cake  - Cupcakes Rock!  We had em.  They were delish.

DJ at my ceremony, not live music  - DJ can be more flexible - this is what we did as well.  He did the ceremony music, cocktail hour/dinner music and reception/dance music.  Way to gol

At the reception, have the Dj dedicate a song and have all of the married couples on the dance floor for a dance  - This is sweet - a nice way to open the dance floor.

1 hour break between ceremony and reception for pictures. Ceremony and reception are in the same location, and the cocktails and canapes are on the patio for guests  - As long as you wine and dine your guests while you are taking pictures, this is fine.  We had about 1 hour 20 minute cocktail hour with apps for our picture time.

me not giving a speech at my wedding. FH will do it, but I just really don't want to have to worry about saying a long winded speech - Neither you, nor your FI HAVE to give a speech at the wedding.  If one of you wants to thank people for coming - that's fine.

no receiving ling - table visits  - That's what we did.  

sweetheart table - not sitting with our WP - This is fully endorsed on this board.

no STDs  - Just make sure the key players know when things are happening - we sent an e-mail and made a few phone calls when we picked our date.  

no veil  - I didn't think I wanted one, they felt really "first communion" to me instead of "bride".  Then I tried on a chapel length one.  Try on a few different styles just to be sure and if you don't find one that truly makes you feel like a bride, then skip it. No one will really notice but you. 

leaving for honeymoon the day after the wedding when OOT guests are still here  -If you want to do this, go for it.  We really appreciated the day of downtime (we did an open house for OOT guests and close family in the evening at MIL's house so had most of the day free) to get organized, open cards, finish packing for the HM, but, if that's the timeline you want, the wedding is the event.

no garter toss, bridal party dance, or kissing games - Boring, boring, and you will get people clinking glasses whether you want them to or not.

there is a hotel on site where many guests are staying (because it's a friday, we took the room discount and the rooms are less than $50) and we don't want to stay with our guests. Our flight for our honeymoon leaves at 11am the next day, so we want to take a cab after the reception and stay at at the hotel by the airport  -This is fine too.  We stayed at our reception site with our wedding party members (and spouses - duh), but had a room block at a hotel down the street for the rest of the guests.  There were only 7 rooms at the inn where we got married so us and the WP filled it up.  This was planned this way on purpose.

 No RD - rehearsal at 7pm day before, and then going to a bar where we will buy beer, pop, other drink, and pub food for the 20 people invited - If there is food, sound like a RD to me.
Posted by shoegal715[/QUOTE]

Beachy730

In Response to Are any of my ideas tacky, weird or rude?:
Not wanting the BMs to sleep over night before the wedding.  I just want it to be me and fiance, but for some reason it seems like every bride stays at her parents with her BMs. Is that rude? 
Many brides sleep at home with their FI too.  I slept at my parents because I still lived there until the wedding, and H's apartment was 2 hours away.  One of my BMs stayed there with me because she lived over  an hour away and wanted to stay with me my last night.  I've only slept over at one bride's house before and it was a good family friend who asked me to. 

- Friday wedding at 5pm 
My Friday ceremony was at 3pm.  I knew and was totally fine with the fact that some people would skip the ceremony and only go to the reception.  People who want to take off or leave work early will, if not no big deal.

 - cucpakes, not cake 
Pretty common now.

- DJ at my ceremony, not live music 
I had a DJ, and I prefer a DJ over a band because there is a way bigger song selection.

- At the reception, have the Dj dedicate a song and have all of the married couples on the dance floor for a dance 
Perfectly fine.  Similar to an Anniversary dance.

- 1 hour break between ceremony and reception for pictures. Ceremony and reception are in the same location, and the cocktails and canapes are on the patio for guests 
That would be considered cocktail hour.

- me not giving a speech at my wedding. FH will do it, but I just really don't want to have to worry about saying a long winded speech
I have never seen anyone give a speech at a wedding except the MOH and BM. 

- no receiving ling - table visits 
That's how we did it, and that's how I prefer.  I hate standing in line forever to say 30 seconds of "congratulations you look beautiful...."  I'd rather be enjoying a meal and a drink when you come around.

- sweetheart table - not sitting with our WP
Pretty common

- no STDs 
Newer thing, not necessary.

 - no veil 
I refused to wear a veil and wore the headband instead shown in my siggy.  Last I checked, our marriage is still valid.

- leaving for honeymoon the day after the wedding when OOT guests are still here 
Other than making yourselves feel rushed, you're fine.

- no garter toss, bridal party dance, or kissing games
People will thank you for that.  I probably wouldn't announce that you're not doing kissing games though, just don't make any mention of them or do anything when people clink glasses.  I would find it odd to hear an announcement saying that the B&G won't be partaking in any kissing games.

- there is a hotel on site where many guests are staying (because it's a friday, we took the room discount and the rooms are less than $50) and we don't want to stay with our guests. Our flight for our honeymoon leaves at 11am the next day, so we want to take a cab after the reception and stay at at the hotel by the airport
That's fine.  Many couples choose to stay at a different hotel for privacy anyways.

  - No RD - rehearsal at 7pm day before, and then going to a bar where we will buy beer, pop, other drink, and pub food for the 20 people invited 
As long as everyone involved with the rehearsal are invited and are fed, thats fine.




I'm with Snippy though.  You've spent more than enough time on here to know these things are okay.

NatandIsaac

Are you actually concerned about any of these things, because it just sounds like you want some attention this morning.

brookelynpaisley

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_of-ideas-tacky-weird-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:760c810f-ba1a-40c7-8d03-4773edaa553ePost:c0231e74-f03d-4b2b-8413-a98d7d72943f">Are any of my ideas tacky, weird or rude?</a>:
[QUOTE]Brutal honesty please!  - Not wanting the BMs to sleep over night before the wedding.  I just want it to be me and fiance, but for some reason it seems like every bride stays at her parents with her BMs. Is that rude? <strong>No, you can do what you want. People are just used to the tradition of sleeping apart that night.</strong>  - Friday wedding at 5pm <strong>This could be an issue - you're asking your guests to probably have to leave work early and fight rush hour traffic to get to your wedding. Push it back an hour, if not too, and it becomes much more convenient for many people</strong>- cucpakes, not cake <strong>Fine</strong> -<strong>   </strong>DJ at my ceremony, not live music <strong>We didn't have any live music</strong>  - At the reception, have the Dj dedicate a song and have all of the married couples on the dance floor for a dance <strong>Totally fine, but you can't <em>make</em> people dance</strong>  - 1 hour break between ceremony and reception for pictures. Ceremony and reception are in the same location, and the cocktails and canapes are on the patio for guests <strong>It's called cocktail hour for a reason</strong>  - me not giving a speech at my wedding. FH will do it, but I just really don't want to have to worry about saying a long winded speech <strong>That's fine. If you're hosting as a couple, either could thank your guests for coming</strong> - no receiving ling <strong>Fine</strong> - table visits <strong>Fine - I prefer this, because you get to actually talk to people and it's not as rushed</strong>  - sweetheart table - not sitting with our WP <strong>Fine</strong> - no STDs <strong>Fine - they're not necessary</strong>  - no veil  <strong>I didn't have one, my sister isn't wearing one. It's your attire, chica</strong> - leaving for honeymoon the day after the wedding when OOT guests are still here <strong>Fine - they don't expect you to stick around and entertain them</strong> - no garter toss, bridal party dance, or kissing games <strong>Bridal parties hate these dances, so this is fine. We didn't do a bouquet or garter toss. If people clink glasses to get you to kiss, ignore it and they'll stop. I don't think anyone did it at our wedding </strong>- there is a hotel on site where many guests are staying (because it's a friday, we took the room discount and the rooms are less than $50) and we don't want to stay with our guests. Our flight for our honeymoon leaves at 11am the next day, so we want to take a cab after the reception and stay at at the hotel by the airport <strong>Fine</strong> - No RD  - rehearsal at 7pm day before, and then going to a bar where we will buy beer, pop, other drink, and pub food for the 20 people invited <strong>How is that not an RD? As long as you're gracious hosts and feed the people who come to your rehearsal, you're fine. It doesn't have to be formal
</strong>
Posted by shoegal715[/QUOTE]

I feel like you've been around long enough to know what our opinions would be on all of this.

[Deleted User]

I agree with PPs, you should know by now what people think of these ideas. The only one I'd take issue with is the Friday wedding, but that's just me personally. I wouldn't say it's tacky, weird, or rude.

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_of-ideas-tacky-weird-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:760c810f-ba1a-40c7-8d03-4773edaa553ePost:c0231e74-f03d-4b2b-8413-a98d7d72943f">Are any of my ideas tacky, weird or rude?</a>:
[QUOTE]Brutal honesty please!  - Not wanting the BMs to sleep over night before the wedding.  I just want it to be me and fiance, but for some reason it seems like every bride stays at her parents with her BMs. Is that rude?  <strong>I don't think it is rude, I stayed with my Grandma. H stayed with his parents before the wedding</strong>- Friday wedding at 5pm  - cucpakes, not cake <strong>Yeah, this is a little rude, at that time of day your guests are going to probably expect a meal. I would either change your time or try to serve some food</strong> - DJ at my ceremony, not live music  <strong>This is a bit different for me as we got married in a church, but I could see how it could be fun</strong>- At the reception, have the Dj dedicate a song and have all of the married couples on the dance floor for a dance  - 1 hour break between ceremony and reception for pictures. <strong>I don't see anything wrong with this one. </strong>Ceremony and reception are in the same location, and the cocktails and canapes are on the patio for guests  - me not giving a speech at my wedding. <strong>I didn't give a speech at our wedding, H and I both said something at the RD, but that was it. </strong>FH will do it, but I just really don't want to have to worry about saying a long winded speech - no receiving ling - <strong>we were not allowed to have a receiving line </strong>table visits  <strong>we tried to get to as many as we could</strong>- sweetheart table <strong>I think this is a great idea, I wish we would have done it</strong>- not sitting with our WP - no STDs <strong>we never did them</strong> - no veil  <strong>I wore a veil, but that is just me, I am pretty traditional</strong>- leaving for honeymoon the day after the wedding when OOT guests are still here  <strong>we did the same thing </strong>- no garter toss, bridal party dance, or kissing games - <strong>we did the garter toss, but that was about it </strong>there is a hotel on site where many guests are staying (because it's a friday, we took the room discount and the rooms are less than $50) and we don't want to stay with our guests. Our flight for our honeymoon leaves at 11am the next day, so we want to take a cab after the reception and stay at at the hotel by the airport  <strong>I think that is fine, we did the exact same thing. We were packed and ready to throw our bags in the Lincoln to take us to the hotel at the airport. We just took the shuttle to the airport terminal</strong>- No RD - rehearsal at 7pm day before, and then going to a bar where we will buy beer, pop, other drink, and pub food for the 20 people invited <strong>I would say that is a RD. You are picking up the tab for the food and drinks, that is all that matters. It doesn't have to be a fancy affair. We just served heavy app's/hor'dourves at ours with wine and mixed drinks.</strong>
Posted by shoegal715[/QUOTE]

J&K10910

Ok, you've been around long enough for ME to recognize you, and you can't figure these out on your own?  None of them are even close to tacky or rude.  Come on.

beatlesgirl25

Methinks someone wanted an excuse to AW her mundane wedding details.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_of-ideas-tacky-weird-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:760c810f-ba1a-40c7-8d03-4773edaa553ePost:5057012a-777d-44a4-9062-fa458f41ee26">Re: Are any of my ideas tacky, weird or rude?</a>:
[QUOTE]Thanks girls!! Oh, I forgot a major one!!  Drinking at my wedding.  My goal is to be happy buzzed, but not sloppy drunk at any point. Tacky? 
Posted by shoegal715[/QUOTE]

<div>I definitely did not want to be THAT bride - the one who's trashed like she's at a sorority party. It was warm the day of my wedding and my dress was hot, so I was gulping down ice water most of the time. People will be talking to you, so you won't have much time to drink (although we were served dinner first, so we had time to eat). I had half a cocktail, half a glass of wine with dinner, and half a beer later in the night. And that was for a 5 hour reception. I wasn't even buzzed!</div><div>
</div><div>Anyway, everything looks good. Seven is hardly a late dinner - I usually eat between 7-8 and I think most people who eat at 6 will be able to tide themselves over during cocktail hour. </div>

DramaGeek

If the majority of your family is off during the summers, then a 5 oclock wedding on a Friday is no big deal.  Dinner shouldn't be a big deal either; like you said, they can plan accordingly.  I was just thinking about my schedule, and if I had to attend a 5 pm wedding during the school year I'd have to go from my lunch, which is at 11, until your cocktail hour with no food because there'd be no time for my to stop and eat.  I'd be one of those freaks scarving down the apps and totally throwing your food count off

shoegal715

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_of-ideas-tacky-weird-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:760c810f-ba1a-40c7-8d03-4773edaa553ePost:d81aa35f-9248-4b50-9f54-8be8d897dfe4">Re: Are any of my ideas tacky, weird or rude?</a>:
[QUOTE]Methinks someone wanted an excuse to AW her mundane wedding details.
Posted by beatlesgirl25[/QUOTE]

<div>Hmm.. not so much. That wasn't my intention.  These are the things that have been side-eyed by mom / family. </div><div>Also, I would say 2 / 3 of the things on my list haven't been mentioned on here (to my knowledge), so that's why I wanted opinions of everything. I also wanted dissenting / alternative views on the things that have been discussed before. </div><div>
</div><div>Thanks for the opinions everyone!</div>

Snippylynn

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_of-ideas-tacky-weird-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:760c810f-ba1a-40c7-8d03-4773edaa553ePost:94c992a6-bb52-48a0-85e3-49a4aea082dc">Re: Are any of my ideas tacky, weird or rude?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Are any of my ideas tacky, weird or rude? : Hmm.. not so much. That wasn't my intention.  These are the things that have been side-eyed by mom / family.  Also, I would say 2 / 3 of the things on my list haven't been mentioned on here (to my knowledge), so that's why I wanted opinions of everything. I also wanted dissenting / alternative views on the things that have been discussed before.  Thanks for the opinions everyone!
Posted by shoegal715[/QUOTE]
You've had over 900 posts, and haven't noticed that ALL of those things have been mentioned?  Maybe you should pay more attention.

J&K10910

Yes, I would like to know what 2/3 of the things on your list haven't been mentioned here.  Because I've seen them all.  And I hardly ever post on E anymore.  But I bet most of them are still being posted about.  Weekly, if not daily. 

kikibaby

Yeah, it's pretty tacky to not get sloppy drunk at your wedding.

shoegal715

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_of-ideas-tacky-weird-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:760c810f-ba1a-40c7-8d03-4773edaa553ePost:8e30883d-24a5-4e77-aa40-64d578c52935">Re: Are any of my ideas tacky, weird or rude?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Are any of my ideas tacky, weird or rude? : You've had over 900 posts, and haven't noticed that ALL of those things have been mentioned? <strong> Maybe you should pay more attention.</strong>
Posted by Snippylynn[/QUOTE]
 <div>Haha. You're a peach. I think you're fishing for drama.</div><div>
</div><div>I have never seen any posts opinions related to: bridesmaids not sleeping over, no actual RD, DJ at ceremony, leaving for honeymoon while oot guests are still there, group dance for married couples, not staying at same hotel as guests, no std, no speech from bride, no kissing games etc.</div>

Snippylynn

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_of-ideas-tacky-weird-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:760c810f-ba1a-40c7-8d03-4773edaa553ePost:d0f701d7-d1df-45e8-8168-3edd5e0043ec">Re: Are any of my ideas tacky, weird or rude?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Are any of my ideas tacky, weird or rude? :   Haha. You're a peach. I think you're fishing for drama. I have never seen any posts opinions related to: bridesmaids not sleeping over, no actual RD, DJ at ceremony, leaving for honeymoon while oot guests are still there, group dance for married couples, not staying at same hotel as guests, no std, no speech from bride, no kissing games etc.
Posted by shoegal715[/QUOTE]

Yes.  Totally fishing for drama.  Me and the other people who agree with me.  I'll make sure to point out the posts that SPECIFICALLY talk about htis.  Jesus.

beatlesgirl25

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_of-ideas-tacky-weird-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:760c810f-ba1a-40c7-8d03-4773edaa553ePost:d0f701d7-d1df-45e8-8168-3edd5e0043ec">Re: Are any of my ideas tacky, weird or rude?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Are any of my ideas tacky, weird or rude? :   Haha. You're a peach. I think you're fishing for drama. I have never seen any posts opinions related to: bridesmaids not sleeping over, no actual RD, DJ at ceremony, leaving for honeymoon while oot guests are still there, group dance for married couples, not staying at same hotel as guests, no std, no speech from bride, no kissing games etc.
Posted by shoegal715[/QUOTE]

Sorry, but these all sound super familiar. And a bunch of them I know I talked about here while planning my wedding, so I'm sure they were brought up after as well. Also, why not just ask about the 2/3 you'd never seen mentioned here? I think the big long list asking for validation is what makes this all seem like stuff you should know or be able to deduce from reading the boards.

shoegal715

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_of-ideas-tacky-weird-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:760c810f-ba1a-40c7-8d03-4773edaa553ePost:e56e2b1e-93f3-4367-8c51-33e5d9d463bc">Re: Are any of my ideas tacky, weird or rude?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Are any of my ideas tacky, weird or rude? : Sorry, but these all sound super familiar. And a bunch of them I know I talked about here while planning my wedding, so I'm sure they were brought up after as well. Also, why not just ask about the 2/3 you'd never seen mentioned here? <strong>I think the big long list asking for validation is what makes this all seem like stuff you should know or be able to deduce from reading the boards.</strong>
Posted by beatlesgirl25[/QUOTE]

<div>Point taken, however my intention was to also to her dissenting opinions on already discussed matters, to see if those people had any insightful thoughts.</div><div>
</div><div>And totally unrelated and random. Your picture is adorable. Do you have tinsel on your tree? I think I see some. </div><div>I only ask because tinsel is extremely dangerous for cats. They love to eat and it can kill them quite easily. My mom's cat died from this 20 years ago. :( </div><div><a href="http://blog.seattlepi.com/catnipconnection/archives/156200.asp" rel="nofollow">http://blog.seattlepi.com/catnipconnection/archives/156200.asp</a></div>

kikibaby

You haven't seen many specific questions about most of this stuff because it's common sense.

squirrly

The only thing I'd side eye is wanting to avoid your OOT guests and leave early for your honeymoon.  They're traveling to see you get married - why the objection to sharing some time with them? 

sap82478

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_of-ideas-tacky-weird-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:760c810f-ba1a-40c7-8d03-4773edaa553ePost:c0231e74-f03d-4b2b-8413-a98d7d72943f">Are any of my ideas tacky, weird or rude?</a>:
[QUOTE]Brutal honesty please!  - Not wanting the BMs to sleep over night before the wedding.  I just want it to be me and fiance, but for some reason it seems like every bride stays at her parents with her BMs. Is that rude?  -I<strong> myself am stayin with my bridal party the night before, only because of our situations, staying with your fh is fine and not tacky however, some "older" indivuduals find it is bad luck and blah blah...</strong> Friday wedding at 5pm ,<strong>Were getting married at 330 so I see no problem with that.. on a friday, if someone can't make the ceremony, thats fine by me, I have given pleanty of notice to the involved and parents that need to be there, plus its Thousands cheaper :)</strong>  - cucpakes, not cake  - <strong>I myself HATE CUP CAKES.. however, I have seen some extreamly NICE ONE's</strong> <strong>It's your day </strong>DJ at my ceremony, not live music . <strong>No live music here, acutally the chapel provides it so i have no idea what we have, whatever works is great </strong>- At the reception, have the Dj dedicate a song and have all of the married couples on the dance floor for a dance  -  <strong>Like the others, I think this is nice...</strong> 1 hour break between ceremony and reception for pictures. <strong>Hour...LOL our receptoin is not until 630, ceremony will be over at 4, we need time to get from A to B location, so an hour is fine.. don't worry :)</strong>  Ceremony and reception are in the same location, and the cocktails and canapes are on the patio for guests  -<strong> THis helps out the hour inbetween, as long as theres food and drink,  ppl don't care. </strong> me not giving a speech at my wedding. FH will do it, but I just really don't want to have to worry about saying a long winded speech -<strong>UM yeah No talking for me either, thats what a MOH is for. :) </strong> no receiving ling - table visits  - <strong>Was wondering this too.. but I think visits are better...</strong>sweetheart table - not sitting with our WP -<strong>This is a choice to YOU its your day, I don't plan on sitting much so sitting with our wp is what were doing..</strong>. no STDs  <strong>-I may sound werid, but i have no idea what this means</strong>... I prob do.. just not at the momemt.  no veil  - <strong>This is a personal preferance....</strong> leaving for honeymoon the day after the wedding when OOT guests are still here - <strong>My FH wants to do this, i wanted to do brunch with the oot guests but he wants to leave... so do as you want.. let them know a head of time.  -</strong> no garter toss, bridal party dance, or kissing games - I <strong>like  doing these so for me I will be, but again,  your day, and I agree with most the Kissing game well that's hard and will be tacky to ask not to .... ( I already know my mom will be the start of this, so were doing Kazoos instead of them banging on glasses.</strong>  there is a hotel on site where many guests are staying (because it's a friday, we took the room discount and the rooms are less than $50) and we don't want to stay with our guests. Our flight for our honeymoon leaves at 11am the next day, so we want to take a cab after the reception and stay at at the hotel by the airport- <strong><font face="Times New Roman" color="#333333">Were doing this too.. Just inform them when your leaving incase they want to "suprise" you</font></strong> No RD - rehearsal at 7pm day before, and then going to a bar where we will buy beer, pop, other drink, and pub food for the 20 people invited ( <strong>This is up to you, Were doing dinner, but no alcohol, TOO MANY PEOPLE...

</strong>GOOD LUCK and have a happy wedding :)
Posted by shoegal715[/QUOTE]

danieliza1127

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_of-ideas-tacky-weird-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:760c810f-ba1a-40c7-8d03-4773edaa553ePost:c0231e74-f03d-4b2b-8413-a98d7d72943f">Are any of my ideas tacky, weird or rude?</a>:
[QUOTE]Brutal honesty please!  - Not wanting the BMs to sleep over night before the wedding.  I just want it to be me and fiance, but for some reason it seems like every bride stays at her parents with her BMs. Is that rude?  - Friday wedding at 5pm  - cucpakes, not cake  - DJ at my ceremony, not live music  - At the reception, have the Dj dedicate a song and have all of the married couples on the dance floor for a dance  - 1 hour break between ceremony and reception for pictures. Ceremony and reception are in the same location, and the cocktails and canapes are on the patio for guests  - me not giving a speech at my wedding. FH will do it, but I just really don't want to have to worry about saying a long winded speech - no receiving ling - table visits  - sweetheart table - not sitting with our WP - no STDs  - no veil  - leaving for honeymoon the day after the wedding when OOT guests are still here  - no garter toss, bridal party dance, or kissing games - there is a hotel on site where many guests are staying (because it's a friday, we took the room discount and the rooms are less than $50) and we don't want to stay with our guests. Our flight for our honeymoon leaves at 11am the next day, so we want to take a cab after the reception and stay at at the hotel by the airport  - No RD - rehearsal at 7pm day before, and then going to a bar where we will buy beer, pop, other drink, and pub food for the 20 people invited 
Posted by shoegal715[/QUOTE]


I don't see anything wrong with any of those ideas.  The only problem you might have is a 5pm wedding on a Friday for those who work.  They'll either have to miss the ceremony or take off work.  That's their choice though and they'll figure it out but they might not appreciate it.

emilyinchile

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_of-ideas-tacky-weird-rude?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:760c810f-ba1a-40c7-8d03-4773edaa553ePost:f05c5bf2-d14c-4216-9145-4ea9013bf054">Re: Are any of my ideas tacky, weird or rude?</a>:
[QUOTE]You haven't seen many specific questions about most of this stuff because it's common sense.
Posted by kikibaby[/QUOTE]

This. I didn't need to ask about the tackiness of wearing/not wearing a veil because I realized that it's just a fashion statement and doesn't matter to anyone except me.