Parent Seating

Starfish0116

Just when I thought I'd had the seating situation for my divorced parents figured out, I've been thrown a curveball. My dad is remarried, and I'm actually close with my stepmom - and not so close with my mom.

My mom dated a guy for YEARS after the divorce, but they never got married (I'm talking 10+ years). I was never fond of him, and we had a strained relationship. They would breakup/makeup constantly, and then broke up for good, and have been at least 3-4 years. There is more to the relationship that makes me dislike him, but for the sake of keeping it short we'll just say that mom's boyfriend was more important than us kids. Today my mom tells me to "add one more to the guest list" because she and him are back together and he's "changed". Regardless of if I want him there or not, he will be invited because he and my mother are a social unit.

My issue comes with ceremony seating. I don't fee like this guy should sit on the front row during the ceremony. What is the etiquette for a situation like this? I honestly can't stand him, and growing up he wasn't very nice to me. I haven't seen or spoken to him in 4+ years. Is he supposed to walk in with my mother? Before finding this info out, my brother was going to escort mom down the isle. 

I was already stressed out about having my dad, stepmom, and mom all sitting in the front row (because I feel my stepmom deserves that honor), now I have to deal with mom's boyfriend. 

Habs2Hart

I agree with Edie, he should sit with her in the front row.  You won't notice.  However, he can be seated before the ceremony starts and your brother can still escort her down the aisle. 

specialk84

I agree with PPs. He should sit with her, but I think he should be seated before the ceremony so your brother can escort your mother.

Edie, YGPM in about a minute.

dumdumfroggie

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_parent-seating?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:7ae068fe-7778-4340-814f-9d879c8b3aa0Post:584ff118-f68d-40f9-b16e-d4ee3cf276f7">Re: Parent Seating</a>:
[QUOTE]I agree with Edie, he should sit with her in the front row.  You won't notice.  However, he can be seated before the ceremony starts and your brother can still escort her down the aisle. 
Posted by Habs2Hart[/QUOTE]

<div>This</div>

mollyehren

I would usually agree with everyone else on this one but fiancee's mom is in a relationship similar to your mothers. Personally we are making the front row reserved for immediate family only, no exceptions.

kmmssg

Don't make sitting in the front row bigger than it really is.  You really can't split them up without causing major problems (you shouldn't split them anyway) so let it go.  You will be plenty occupied with getting married and it isn't something you are even going to be watching.  Heck, you will have your back to him.  This is not a hill I would die on.

AlmostMrsStrong

What about sitting them on opposite sides of the front row? The whole bride's side/groom's side is really not a big deal anymore. This is probably what I'll have to do for my parents since some epic BS drama went down at my graduation a few weeks ago.

Starfish0116

Thanks everyone! I know I'm probably making a bigger deal out of this than it really is. I'm just having a hard time stomaching the whole thing, especially with my mother. We are not close, and she's not really involved in my life that much. If we talk once a month I'd be suprised. I am anticipating her sweeping in during the wedding and playing the duitiful mother of the bride. It just makes me sad to think the potential is there for her to take the attention away from my stepmom, who IS part of my daily life and I'm much closer to. With her and this guy, there is always drama involved, and I would just really love for my wedding to be as drama free as possible.