Plus ones?

jessss21

So we're starting to hammer out this wedding guest list.  What is the etiquette for plus ones?  We went to college together and have a lot of mid-twenties friends.  I was planning on giving plus ones to those with SOs, but not for those that are single.  Is that super rude?  I feel like the group of people we will be inviting is one large group of friends, so they won't be sitting alone or anything like that.  If we do plus ones for everyone, we'd probably only be able to invite 1/2 the friends that we'd like to.  I have a friend who gave everyone a plus one and what ended up happening was that everyone with a plus one just brought another friend from the group that hadn't been invited.  I'd rather be able to say who I want then hurt people's feelings by having them invited through other people.  I need a little verification that I'm not way off on this one.

benthere

this won't be very popular, but think it is a worthy "fyi" regarding inviting people with guests.And I speak from the heart - having been there and done that.  When your guests are in the 30-something range, and they are not married or in a long term relationship; I think its kinder and classier to invite them with a guest.  I know its your day, but these friends of yours have had a few long and expensive months, too.  They've been your ears when they've listened to you stress over your dress/flowers/mother/future in-laws, ad nauseum.  They've spend major bucks of their own at your shower(s), bachlorette party(ies), engagement party, wedding gifts, their own attire.  They promise to be all eyes when you walk down the aisle, take your vows, enter the reception venue.  They'll listen through all the toasts from people they really don't know.  After that, you're really on your own.  These friends won't be following you around all night as your own personal entourage.  These freinds now consider "your day" a party, and don' want to feel like the loser who is tere all alone.  They want someone to dance with, toast with, converse with.  And yes, they know other couples there -- but are tired of feeling like the third wheel.  And besides, it would be nice to share a cab ride home with someone.  Give them a break.  If they are your FRIENDS, a little concern about their comfort should be considered.  Their GIFT to you will reflect that two are attending instead of one, they're not stupid, so don't use the cost factor as your main criterion.  And I strongly agree with the much earlier comment that they would be more impressed with your consideration of them than they would be with your $600.00 shoes.  Think about it.  Now I will just sit back and wait for the backlash.  Remember this, it's just an opinion - not a dictate.