Bridal hair etiquette if not requiring hair to be done

christyac

I am at a loss here not sure what the etiquette is.  I am NOT requiring my girls to get their hair done.  We are getting ready in the hotel room.  At first I was going to have my mom do my hair but after a few trial runs thats not happening.  I want to pay someoen to come onsight and do my hair.  The only problem is i don't want to pay for the bridal party to get thiers done.  Do I need to if I am nto requireing them to get their hair done.  Also is it ok if I just get mine done?

Time is also a constrait since I am getting married at 11am the hair lady(ies) wont' have time to get all 5 girls done.  Just not sure what to do.

Thanks.

FutureMrsFezz

If you are requiring them to get their hair done, you pay. 

Mrs.B6302007

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_bridal-hair-etiquette-not-requiring-hair-done?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8434e91f-3473-4e71-8060-1ed33d75195bPost:f0fec381-4ca7-439b-9887-f28070884974">Bridal hair etiquette if not requiring hair to be done</a>:
[QUOTE]I am at a loss here not sure what the etiquette is.  I am NOT requiring my girls to get their hair done.  We are getting ready in the hotel room.  At first I was going to have my mom do my hair but after a few trial runs thats not happening.  I want to pay someoen to come onsight and do my hair.  The only problem is i don't want to pay for the bridal party to get thiers done.  Do I need to if I am nto requireing them to get their hair done.  Also is it ok if I just get mine done? Time is also a constrait since I am getting married at 11am the hair lady(ies) wont' have time to get all 5 girls done.  Just not sure what to do. Thanks.
Posted by christyac[/QUOTE]

If you don't expect them to get their hair done then, no, you don't have to pay. It's okay to just get yours done.

aragx6

You can be the only one to have your hair done professionally.

If your BMs really want their hair done and there's time, they can pay your stylist to do yours.

But if, as it sounds from your post, there isn't time for your stylist to do their hair in the time you have, then your BMs can just get it done elsewhere if they want to.

If you're going to require your BMs to have their hair done though, you need to pay for it.

Milsey32

No requirement = No pay. You can be the only one getting it done by the pro, no problemo. [: 

Audrey&Austin

If you aren't requiring that they have their hair professionally done, you don't have to pay for it. It is perfectly fine to only have your hair done on site. If your girls want to have their hair done by a professional they can have it done elsewhere or ask your hair stylist to do theirs if there is sufficient time.

[Deleted User]

Ditto Mrs. Fezz.

But if you just tell your BM's that they are free to use whoever they want and do their hair however they want. However, I think that since your stylist is coming to the venue where everyone will be getting ready, that is going to be an awkard position for them.

I would ask them who is interested in getting their hair done with your stylist so they can plan accordingly and get another stylist if needed. And then I would just go ahead and pick up the tab. If they offer to pay for it themselves or pay you back, then fine. But you should offer since your stylist is going to be there. They are going to feel obligated to use her.

LuluP82

I also didn't require hair to be done, and I also had someone come to my hotel suite to do it. What I did is, I emailed the bridesmaids, mothers, aunts, grandmothers and said I had a hair and makeup person coming to do my hair. She charged X amount for wedding guests and bridal party. I said if they were interested, to let me know, and I'd make an appointment for them. One of my bridesmaids, the moms, and grandmother and one aunt opted in. Everyone else said no thanks.

Just be warned though-- my lady required that I be responsible for paying for everyone who had signed up, so make sure you are comfortably able to cover everyone who signs up just in case anyone flakes and forgets to bring money. Also...they will do the bride last so you can be fresher, so MAKE SURE your girls are okay with starting super early. We had issues because, even though I voluntarily went first since we were getting pictures done at 2 pm and I didn't want to make everyone else sit around ready from 10 am until 5 when the ceremony was starting, I had a LOT of people flake on the stylist and not show up on time, because they thought it was "too early to get ready". Everyone wanted her to do their hair like an hour before the ceremony, which is just not going to happen. It was the single MOST stressful thing for me the day of-- luckily I had great friends who were able to track down folks (and I took off once I was fully ready and forgot about it all), but it sucked and I felt super bad for the stylist.

hlq2011

I disagree with Missy.

It's perfectly okay to say, hey, my stylist is coming to the hotel (or wherever you're getting your hair done).  If you want to use her, she charges X.  Otherwise, feel free to do your own, or get it done somewhere else.

Bringing your stylist onsite doesn't oblige you to pick up the tab and hope your girls offer.  No.

But it's perfectly okay to just say, hey, you guys are on your own where hair is concerned, and get yours done regardless.

StacyJenniges

I personally think if you are requiriing them to get it done you should pay, what I have done is I sent an email to my bridesmaids and let them choose if they wanted to spend the money on getting their hair done or not, and I would make the appointment for them.  

So in your case I would let your BMs know that you are having someone come in to do your hair and ask who would like to get their hair done too, making sure they know they have to cover the cost if they do.  This way you have put the decision in their hands instead of yours.  I would make sure you know what their costs will be before the commit so they are not surprised.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

That's fine. I had someone come to my hotel room and do my hair and makeup and my mom's hair and makeup. My BMs declined to get their hair or makeup professionally done, which was a-okay. They just showed up, got dressed, and did their own hair and makeup while I was getting ready.

Loopyseven

I sent my BM's and mom and MIL an e-mail and said I'd be gettting my hair and make-up done at X salon.  Their prices were $ and $.  Did anyone want in as I'd make all the appointments together and if they did their own that was fine too.  We all got hair done and one BM and myself got make-up done and everyone paid for themselves.

christyac

Thank you so much.  I knew I wasn't responsible if I wasnt' requiring it.  JKust unsure if it was ok for me to do.  I now know one less thing to worry about.  Thank you again girls for your insights.  I will email my girls and let them know if they are interesed they can on thier own.