Discuss.

J&K10910

http://imom.com/parenting/tweens/parenting/training/21-creative-consequences/

ErinG93

Number nine is absolutely insane. That's all the discussions I have so far.

musicalsunlight

Well...they definitely are creative. Several of them, I can see being effective, others I think would just make your kids resent you. 

MyUserName1

Some of those are brilliant and some of them are borderline mental abuse.

I lived by the egg timer as a kid.  I'd have to do things I dreaded (cleaning my room, mopping the floor, etc.) for a certain amount of time unless I finished it thoroughly in less.  Aces for my ADD.

Beachy730

I think some are pretty funny, and some are just dumb.  Running through the yard barefoot after picking up poop, all for it.  I can see myself doing something like that.  Or taking the door off the hinges, I know a lot of people who had that happen to them.  Sending them outside during a temper tantrum, sure.  

I'm not a big fan of punishment jars or things like that though.  And I don't like the time-in thing.  

ArynBaker

I'm still reading but I hate #5. If the kid isn't tired they are just going to lay there and get annoyed. And if they're like me, if they go to bed annoyed, they wake up cranky, and then the cycle would continue. 

pokepoke27

Yeah, I really think it depends on the child as to wether or not those would work.

I'd also like to know if an "act of disobedience" is what I think it is. 

Anysunrise

Some are pretty sensible, like 4 (speaking from experience : /), and some are totally whackadoodle, like 9.

Anysunrise

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_discuss-5?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8862bfbe-d47d-45e5-a75e-fa4b054a4795Post:8755aaf0-353f-4165-a905-fe760509818f">Re: Discuss.</a>:
[QUOTE]Yeah, I really think it depends on the child as to wether or not those would work. I'd also like to know if an "act of disobedience" is what I think it is. 
Posted by pokepoke27[/QUOTE]

<div>Bow chicka wow wow.</div>

Girlie1030

My sister was a holy terror as a child and a teenager, I can see very few of these working for her and a number of them just pissing her off further. 

pokepoke27

Oh, I also don't like implying that "going to bed" is a punishment. I get sending them to their room or something, but having the whole extra 5 minutes thing really does make the child feel as though bed time is bad. 

ErinG93

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_discuss-5?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8862bfbe-d47d-45e5-a75e-fa4b054a4795Post:41949e5b-829b-4c33-95d7-8e7b847def77">Re: Discuss.</a>:
[QUOTE]I think some are pretty funny, and some are just dumb.  Running through the yard barefoot after picking up poop, all for it.  I can see myself doing something like that.  Or taking the door off the hinges, I know a lot of people who had that happen to them.  Sending them outside during a temper tantrum, sure.   I'm not a big fan of punishment jars or things like that though.  And I don't like the time-in thing.  
Posted by Beachy730[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>I think the running through the yard one is pretty funny. 

</div>

Anysunrise

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_discuss-5?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8862bfbe-d47d-45e5-a75e-fa4b054a4795Post:3ea41941-89db-4ef6-9a09-071ca04e97f3">Re: Discuss.</a>:
[QUOTE]My sister was a holy terror as a child and a teenager, I can see very few of these working for her and a number of them just pissing her off further. 
Posted by Girlie1030[/QUOTE]

<div>Yeah, had my mom tried any of these with my middle brother, she'd have gotten a big "Fvck you". </div>

ErinG93

On the going to bed thing, I could be totally wrong, but I don't like bedtime as a punishment. I would hope that my future kids associate bedtime with relaxing and comfort, not punishment. I don't think going to bed early teaches good sleeping habits, which would be my goal. 

musicalsunlight

Yeah I totally imagined the act of disobedience meaning catching your kid whackin' it. 

brandichamberlain

I think that every child is the same, but some of these are good.  I like the bedroom door one.  

I went to HS with a girl who had parents with creative parenting.  She wouldn't get her phone or car keys taken away, but she would get her charger and wheels taken away.  She came out one day and her car just had no wheels.  

Anysunrise

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_discuss-5?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8862bfbe-d47d-45e5-a75e-fa4b054a4795Post:e90b6740-eb8c-4d6f-b51d-3ab3daec933c">Re: Discuss.</a>:
[QUOTE]I think that every child is the same, but some of these are good.  I like the bedroom door one.   I went to HS with a girl who had parents with creative parenting.  She wouldn't get her phone or car keys taken away, but she would get her charger and wheels taken away.  <strong>She came out one day and her car just had no wheels.  </strong>
Posted by brandichamberlain[/QUOTE]

<div>Lol, awesome. I'm going to spend the next 7 years thinking up amusing ways to punish my children.</div><div>
</div><div>
</div><div>Clearly I'm going to be a great mother...</div>

pokepoke27

Brandi - that's hilarious. 

musicalsunlight

Brandi you think every child is the same? Jiggawha?

Anysunrise

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_discuss-5?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8862bfbe-d47d-45e5-a75e-fa4b054a4795Post:c3c105e2-c042-4537-baa2-c78f2ffd6385">Re: Discuss.</a>:
[QUOTE]Brandi you think every child is the same? Jiggawha?
Posted by musicalsunlight[/QUOTE]

<div>I was wondering that too. I'm assuming she forgot a "don't" in there.</div>

J&K10910

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_discuss-5?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8862bfbe-d47d-45e5-a75e-fa4b054a4795Post:7aff5f45-685e-49e6-87d6-3cdf1389d9b3">Re: Discuss.</a>:
[QUOTE]On the going to bed thing, I could be totally wrong, but I don't like bedtime as a punishment. I would hope that my future kids associate bedtime with relaxing and comfort, not punishment. I don't think going to bed early teaches good sleeping habits, which would be my goal. 
Posted by ErinG93[/QUOTE]

Agree.

I really like 1 and 2.  (1 moreso with younger kids, to help them regulate during a temper outburst.)  I use a variation of the "Correction can" with one of my families, except it has positive family activities in it too--like baking cookies with mom or playing a game wtith a sibling.  It works really well for them.

Some of them are demeaning (the tongue holding one made me shudder).  My big problem with most of them is that they don't do what consequences should do.  Consequences should either be natural or logical.  They need to teach you WHY you don't (or do) do something--and that reason shouldn't be "because mommy makes me hold on to my tongue in public"

HandBanana

My parents used 4., taking the bedroom door off the hinges, for slamming your door in anger, locking your door and refusing to open it, and yelling through a closed or locked door. Did wonders for teaching me how to express my anger and to respect others and appreciate my privacy.

musicalsunlight

Ah that would make sense Any. 

My parents did the old fashioned "take away your privileges" thing and that was usually effective. 

seesawgirl

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_discuss-5?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8862bfbe-d47d-45e5-a75e-fa4b054a4795Post:7aff5f45-685e-49e6-87d6-3cdf1389d9b3">Re: Discuss.</a>:
[QUOTE]On the going to bed thing, I could be totally wrong, but I don't like bedtime as a punishment. I would hope that my future kids associate bedtime with relaxing and comfort, not punishment. I don't think going to bed early teaches good sleeping habits, which would be my goal. 
Posted by ErinG93[/QUOTE]

<div>
</div><div>I agree with the above.</div><div>
</div><div>Also, everything else depends on the child. Some kids, those things would work on, other children (like my brother) would stand in the middle of the room screaming "YOU CANT MAKE ME!!!!!!" if I or his Dad told him to do any of the above. Maybe when he was younger, but most definitely not now that he is 13. Then he'd probably walk out of the house, or try to hit one of us. Quite the brat, that one is. </div><div>
</div><div>Edited, because of my stupid iPad trying to take over the words I want to say. </div>

MyUserName1

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_discuss-5?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8862bfbe-d47d-45e5-a75e-fa4b054a4795Post:2feac9ca-ac2d-4338-9e8b-10948e89b1e5">Re: Discuss.</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Discuss. : Agree. I really like 1 and 2.  (1 moreso with younger kids, to help them regulate during a temper outburst.)  I use a variation of the "Correction can" with one of my families, except it has positive family activities in it too--like baking cookies with mom or playing a game wtith a sibling.  It works really well for them. Some of them are demeaning (the tongue holding one made me shudder).  My big problem with most of them is that they don't do what consequences should do. <strong> Consequences should either be natural or logical.  They need to teach you WHY you don't (or do) do something--and that reason shouldn't be "because mommy makes me hold on to my tongue in public"</strong>
Posted by J&K10910[/QUOTE]

<div>Pre-fucking-cicely.  </div><div>
</div><div>Teach the kid that throwing a temper tantrum gets them ignored.  Or that if they leave their schitt out, Mom will put it "away" is a good lesson too.  in real life, you don't take care of your junk someone'll steal it.</div>

brandichamberlain

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_discuss-5?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8862bfbe-d47d-45e5-a75e-fa4b054a4795Post:e12a6f6b-b5e6-445d-826f-d171653a9ae7">Re: Discuss.</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Discuss. : I was wondering that too. I'm assuming she forgot a "don't" in there.
Posted by Anysunrise[/QUOTE]

<div>This.  I meant children aren't the same.</div><div>
</div><div>I was telling FI about the punishments and can't type and talk at the same time effectively. </div>

pokepoke27

I would totally hide my kids stuff if they don't put it away. That's just funny. 

J&K10910

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_discuss-5?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8862bfbe-d47d-45e5-a75e-fa4b054a4795Post:9dbcd68a-ba9a-4075-89af-56d2a10bb59a">Re: Discuss.</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Discuss. : Pre-fucking-cicely.   Teach the kid that throwing a temper tantrum gets them ignored.  Or that if they leave their schitt out, Mom will put it "away" is a good lesson too.  in real life, you don't take care of your junk someone'll steal it.
Posted by MyUserName1[/QUOTE]

Oh yeah, I liked the putting the stuff away and making them look for it one too.  Until it backfires and they don't care anymore.  But it could definitely work for some kids.

brandichamberlain

Do any of you believe in corporal punishment (specifically spanking)?

strlzfan11

Some of them are really creative but others are a little out there.  I would consider using some of them.

musicalsunlight

The taking privileges thing doesn't work for my brothers and I don't know why they (my parents) haven't tried other things by now.