etiquette for addressing envelopes!?

eav2c

Hi everyone--a couple quick questions. I'm in the process of gathering names/addresses and putting them in word document and I'm a little confused about some of the proper etiquette for labeling peoples name.

First--several guests invited are widows. Do they still go by Mrs or is it Ms.?
Second-my dad's longtime girlfriend is a widow... She is getting a separate invitation as they don't live together and aren't really in a serious relationship. Since she is dating, what would be the most proper way to address her on the invitation?
Third-One couple I am inviting are married but she did not take her husband's last name. She is a doctor and I know that on address labels you are supposed to put to "Dr. so & so"... Since they don't have the same last name would it be "Dr. Smith and Mr. Stevens" or "Mr. Stevens and Dr. Smith" ??

Thanks so much for the help!

quotequeen

Technically a widow is still Mrs. John Smith, but it really depends on her and what she goes by.  I would try to find out how she would like to be addressed.

For the couple with the doctor, I believe the ladies first rule still applies.

kathyhm

I recommend going to the library or bookstore for an ettiquette book.  These things can get quite complicated sometimes.  I would have never thought of these questions until I started making my guest list and wondering how to address some people.  It's also a good idea to ask the guest how he/she wishes to be addressed.  Of course, those who get too bent out of shape about how their names are arranged on the invitation should get either more sleep or a hobby.

Kristin&eric

I would think widows are still Mrs. but i heard that they are Ms.? And for the Dr one i think it is Mr Jones and Dr. Smith. 

Kristin789

WIDOWS:  Mrs. John Smith
Ms. is traditionally used for unmarried women over 18.

DAD'S GF:  Jennifer Johnson
She IS Mrs. Robert Johnson, but since she is now involved with a new man and she will be attending the wedding as the DATE of her new man, I would address her envelope with no honorific like Ms. or Mrs.

LADY DOCTOR:  Dr. Janet Smith and Mr. John Doe
Higher ranking title goes first.

angel2210

I found this very helpful while doing mine: http://www.wedalert.com/content/articles/address_invitations.asp

JanoBean75

Check out the book by Crane & Co. "Wedding Blue Book." LOTS of great info in there. Or just check the etiquette section on their web site.

If the doctor is a medical doctor, they may use the title "Doctor" -- all other doctors should not use that title social, so they are Mr. or Mrs./Ms.

Regarding your father's girlfriend: Ask her what she goes by. She may not go by Mrs. Robert Smith. Address her the way she prefers regardless of whether she's dating or not.

ohwhynot

Just an fyi:  "Ms." is not a synonym for "Miss," despite what Kristen says.  Ms. is used by single and by married women.  I've used it my entire adult life, married or single.  It is perfectlly proper to address a married woman by Ms.

mica178

Regarding widows, the proper etiquette would be Mrs. Deceased Husband's Name, but as she's the long-standing girlfriend of your father, she might prefer to be Ms.  I'm guessing there won't be such an overwhelming number of widows at the wedding that you can't ask them what is their preferred title?  Especially your father's girlfriend, because you don't want her to feel uncomfortable.

The highest title goes first and the man's name shouldn't be separated.  So Dr. Jane Smith and Mr. John Doe or Dr. Jane and Mr. John Doe.

Calypso1977

Ms. is traditionally used for unmarried women over 18.

No.  Ms. can be used for any female, regardless of marital status.  i am married, and i use Ms. (i do not have my husband's name, therefore i am not Mrs. His Last Name, nor am i Miss my last name (because i'm married) or Mrs. My last name (because that is my mother)).

widows are Mrs. John Smith unless she did not take his name of course.