A little strange

amorg334

So while I was at work today.  I am a pharmacy tech so I see a lot of people.  A woman came in and saw I was engaged.  She commented saying she just got married under a month ago and if I am planning a wedding to just stop and go elope.  She gave me this advice because her wedding was an absolute nightmare and she hated everything about it and she did the bare minimum she could possibly do and still spent 14K.  I listened to her go on and on about the waste of money.  She then asked me what I was planning on spending.  I told her that I found a venue that with tax a gratuity was $47.00 per person (which everywhere else in the entire county is between 60-170 per person without anything included).  She told me I was insane for wasting my money and spending so much.  I thought it was strange and little rude of her.  It was almost like she couldn't have the wedding of her dreams because of her budgetary restraints so she wanted to rain on my parade.

andrea2473

What a ho.   Don't you just love unsolicited advice.  Yes, wedding costs can creep up there.  You have to pay attention to the fine print (gratuties, rental costs, etc) while keeping your guests comfort in mind.  But no, if you are planning the wedding that you and your FI want and can afford, then it's not a waste of money.  Good luck. 

[Deleted User]

Why did you bother answering her question about your budget in the first place? That's none of her business. You answering gave her validation for telling you her opinion. If you wanted to be nice you could've just said, "Oh, we're not that far along in the planning." If you wanted to be more blunt, you could've taken a beat, looked at her for 3-5 seconds, then continued on with her business for being there. Consider this a lesson learned in knowing who to talk to about your wedding.

brilibby4

She sounds like a biiitch.  Plan the wedding you and fiance want and can afford.  Don't worry about what anyone else thinks (as long as you follow proper etiquette) and stop sharing prices with random people.

amorg334

Oh I knew she was going to rude about it and I thought her reaction was priceless.  She is the real first negative reaction I have gotten.  Most people are surprised to hear about a place with all the taxes and gratuity costing so little.  I think she just had jealous wedding syndrome.  I know I am going to encounter a lot of people like that.  You need to know what you can afford and if you want something more extravigant push back your wedding.  

ootmother2

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_a-little-strange?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:8d1d60e3-511f-45d4-9288-054c714e8168Post:3ab24d90-209a-496a-9ffd-cb2d3472bd75">A little strange</a>:
[QUOTE]So while I was at work today.  I am a pharmacy tech so I see a lot of people.  A woman came in and saw I was engaged.  She commented saying she just got married under a month ago and if I am planning a wedding to just stop and go elope.  She gave me this advice because her wedding was an absolute nightmare and she hated everything about it and she did the bare minimum she could possibly do and still spent 14K.  I listened to her go on and on about the waste of money.  She then asked me what I was planning on spending.  I told her that I found a venue that with tax a gratuity was $47.00 per person (which everywhere else in the entire county is between 60-170 per person without anything included).  She told me I was insane for wasting my money and spending so much.  I thought it was strange and little rude of her.  It was almost like she couldn't have the wedding of her dreams because of her budgetary restraints so she wanted to rain on my parade.

Have the wedding you & fi can afford and turn your hearing off when she talks.

Perhaps to her it was a waste of money but you are a totally different person, right?
Posted by amorg334[/QUOTE]

willywally5

Wow. Was her name Debbie Downer? I hope she was picking up some anti-depressants. 

Don't let her rain on your parade. Your wedding will be wonderful and worth it! I'd also try to be really busy on the phone or counting pills next time she comes in. Yikes.

amorg334

HAHA.. If i could be busy counting pills or being on the phone I would..  Today was my day to cashier the pharmacy pickup.  And how I see it I am a comepletly different person than her.  I understand what I can afford and how to make it work and love every minute of it.  

joleri23

You know, ever since I got engaged in December, people have been nothing but negative!!! Unfortunately, some people just have no class and say whatever is on their mind. Usually I chalk it up to jealousy, smile and walk away.

Or you can always use my stand-by line: "Well, I'm sorry you feel that way." (Note: you have to say this in your most matter-of-fact, non-sarcastic voice to get the best effect.)