step sister wants an invite :/

jhiciano3

so my step sister who i haven't seen in over 14 years and only contacted me through facebook to be nosy sent me the following message on Facebook after my half brother (her little brother) & my father got their invitations.

" Hey sister... So i heard you are getting married... I have not received my invitation yet, What's up with that?????????????? "

I have no clue how to respond to that. 1. She lives in another state 2. I'm having a destination wedding and I know she won't come and 3. She's fake and I don't want to invite her. I know I can be a bit rude especially online and I want to avoid issues with my brother, since he grew up with her and i know she make a thunderstorm in a glass of water. when I bring up the facts of why she didn't get an invite. 

WildRumpus

If it's a DW and you "know she won't come", would it be easier to just send her an invitation to avoid making waves between you, your brother, and your dad?

angie74

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_step-sister-wants-invite?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:904789c8-0595-4935-867a-036bbc96d779Post:75b1b61a-eba6-43d4-aaa8-0a58234e4564">Re: step sister wants an invite :/</a>:
[QUOTE]If it's a DW and you "know she won't come", would it be easier to just send her an invitation to avoid making waves between you, your brother, and your dad?
Posted by Jill9288[/QUOTE]

I totally agree. Or if you are worried that she may change her mind, then you could just say you're having a small wedding and can only invite a hand full of people.

danieliza1127

I think you have two options - 1) just invite her to keep the peace since she probably won't come anyway.  Tell her is was a post office error or something. or 2) just be straight with her and tell her that since you haven't seen her in 14 years and don't have a relationship with her, you didn't feel that was right to invite her to your intimate destination wedding.

BecW2be

From her comment, it sounds like she knows invites are out, and she may realize it's a destination wedding and is still planning to come. I would NOT invite her if you don't want her there. Explain that it's a very small wedding and you can't wait to catch up in a few months after it's all over.

squirrly

I would just let her know it's a very small, intimate wedding and you limited the guest list to people you see regularly.

eav2c

Sounds to me like she knows its a DW and wants to go.

I also think it's very rude for someone to ask where "their" invitiation is... If someone did that to me (even if they were getting invited), I'd probably axe them out of the guest list it's in very poor taste.

How old is she? Maybe she just doesn't understand that messaging you is quite rude... I kind of laughed when I first read the message as she called you "sister"... Seems like she is trying to grief you into inviting her.

Has your dad or stepbrother mentioned anything about inviting her? If not, I wouldn't worry about it.

leayn

i think you should write her back and say "who is this?"

i would not feel bad about not inviting someone who is not in your life...especially after 14 years.  she's kinda ridiculous.....

MyNameIsNot

Oh, it's sweet that you want to come, but we're on a tight budget and had to keep it super small.  We wished we could have invited everyone we wanted to.

How's [insert subject change here]? 

Or just ignore her completely.  That's what I would do.