I've been waiting years to join these boards!

lizarellie

Hi there! Get ready to start hearing all my wedding craziness, everyone!

My boyfriend...or fiancé and I have been together for almost 5 years (our anniversary is in Dec) and we've finally decided we're financially stable enough to have a wedding.

So hooray! No ring yet, but he says he's still going to surprise me with that.

The weird part is that we're going to have two receptions. Both of our families are giant and his side wants us to get married on his grandparents' land. Unfortunately with the amount of people we'd want to invite, we figured it wasn't possible until my parents offered to throw us a second reception in THEIR backyard.

And since I've been stalking these boards for years, I know how that sounds and I'm prepared...haha.

Anyway, I'm so happy to join all of you!

lizarellie

Hi there! Get ready to start hearing all my wedding craziness, everyone!

My boyfriend...or fiancé and I have been together for almost 5 years (our anniversary is in Dec) and we've finally decided we're financially stable enough to have a wedding.

So hooray! No ring yet, but he says he's still going to surprise me with that.

The weird part is that we're going to have two receptions. Both of our families are giant and his side wants us to get married on his grandparents' land. Unfortunately with the amount of people we'd want to invite, we figured it wasn't possible until my parents offered to throw us a second reception in THEIR backyard.

And since I've been stalking these boards for years, I know how that sounds and I'm prepared...haha.

Anyway, I'm so happy to join all of you!

kikibaby

You've been lurking for years?

georgia_bride09

So... lurker who wants two receptions. Huh.

How are you going to pull that off?

Stackeye210

Congrats.  I hope your "official engagement ring asking" is everything you dream of. 

I find it slightly creepy that you've been lurking for 6 years which is longer then you and your (almost FI) have been together and this is your very first post. 

However, good luck with planning, I can't imagine the logistics of your reception and AHR are going to be easy. 

Mrs.B6302007

wednesday entertainment

lizarellie

I've been helping plan friends and family weddings for a long time, so I used to read the knot A LOT. Now, there were times when I didn't think about wedding stuff for months, but yeah, I've been reading the knot for a long, long time. I love wedding planning and seriously considered going into professional event planning for a while there.

And no, I'm not demanding two receptions nor was it even my idea. But having two receptions would mean being able to involve everyone we wanted to. And they're not going to be the standard linens and dance floor and candy buffet style weddings. We're keeping things very simple. Backyard BBQ is more of our theme.

Also, we're having two receptions because I don't live in the same state as my family. 

crfische

I don't think I want you to join. And I mean that in the nicest way possible.

lizarellie

I understand what I sound like. Oh well.

waltzingmatilda13

Okay then.

marissa_claire

Sorry I was just reading another one like this where the girl was polling what you're most looking forward to about getting engaged - then I looked at her profile and saw she has posted over 1000 times!  What?  As much as I wanted to be engaged I never would have dreamed of going to a wedding planning web site before I got engaged and started planning.  

arv266

The weird part is that we're going to have two receptions. Both of our families are giant and his side wants us to get married on his grandparents' land. Unfortunately with the amount of people we'd want to invite, we figured it wasn't possible until my parents offered to throw us a second reception in THEIR backyard

Ok... So you are basically planning a reception that accomodates your FI's side of the family, but not your family.... And IF your family wants to celebrate with you, then your parents will have to throw you a party...   Let me know how that works out for you...  


    

Mrs.B6302007

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ive-waiting-years-join-boards?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:909aa58a-c02b-43ae-8d8f-ad3ed3b298daPost:28dbe311-9ba7-4881-87cd-829b8a9cecd7">I've been waiting years to join these boards!</a>:
[QUOTE]Hi there! <strong>Get ready to start hearing all my wedding craziness, everyone!</strong> My boyfriend...or fiancé and I have been together for almost 5 years (our anniversary is in Dec) and we've finally decided we're financially stable enough to have a wedding. So hooray! No ring yet, but he says he's still going to surprise me with that. The weird part is that we're going to have two receptions. Both of our families are giant and his side wants us to get married on his grandparents' land. Unfortunately with the amount of people we'd want to invite, we figured it wasn't possible until my parents offered to throw us a second reception in THEIR backyard. And since I've been stalking these boards for years, I know how that sounds and I'm prepared...haha. Anyway, I'm so happy to join all of you!
Posted by lizarellie[/QUOTE]

it's too early in the morning

crfische

NIMBY.

lizarellie

Yeah I find that to be a bit creepy, which says a bit coming from someone who's been lurking for what is it now? six years?

But I mean, I love wedding planning because I love party planning. I've helped plan four weddings now, so I've been pretty immersed in all this stuff for a while now. And the knot is good for general party planning too.

But yes. Hello everyone. I don't know if really said anything about myself:

I live in Iowa with my fiancé, who is a correctional officer at a prison. I am a nursing student and we've lived together for almost four years. We have a horribly mean cat that I can't imagine getting rid of...ummm..that's about it.

emilyinchile

So you've been lurking 6 years but didn't get that it might be a bad idea to start out on E announcing that you're having 2 receptions? Clever.

missy68

Don't go where you're thinking, Fish. Please?

SugarBrideOct10

Wow, you guys are mean.  What is wrong with having 2 receptions if they are in different states?  People do it all the time with destination weddings.

And I don't know what is lamer ... lurking or having 15000+ posts on a message board.
.
WAIT!

I do know which one is lamer.

louisvillebride21

...have we been invaded?

IT'S FUTUREMRS AND USERNAME!!!!111!!!

[Deleted User]

I think that if you've been lurking for this long, then you should know better than to share the fact that you're having 2 receptions, you're engaged but not really, and that you are about to share a bunch of wedding craziness. But that's just me.

btrflykate1230

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ive-waiting-years-join-boards?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:909aa58a-c02b-43ae-8d8f-ad3ed3b298daPost:a6bb9e65-2f6c-4a12-b377-29ed7bbd5f4a">Re: I've been waiting years to join these boards!</a>:
[QUOTE]NIMBY.
Posted by crfische[/QUOTE]

DED. I love you.

georgia_bride09

liza... how will the logistics of the second reception work? It sounds like the people at your parents' reception won't be invited to the ceremony (real wedding).

Why not just include everyone? If it's budget reasons, why not just invite ONLY THOSE WITH WHOM YOU'RE CLOSEST?

Weddings are not all-inclusive family reunions, you know.

lizarellie

I haven't read these boards as of late, but I see it's reputation of snarky brides continues on.

But I guess that's what I love about these forums.

Anyway, I don't really know how to get the idea of what we're planning across.

We're having a small ceremony with my finance's family + extended family, and my immediate family and close friends. Then we're having a small BBQ style reception. My fiancé's grandparents pretty much raised him, and while he understood we couldn't manage a larger wedding on their property, he was still sad about it. He loves and adores them, as do I.

I'm not really even planning the second reception. That's a party that my parents are throwing because they didn't want to try to take control of my wedding. They understand that we couldn't afford or handle having the wedding they always wanted me to have. Since they want to include everyone I WISH I could (including old neighbors, old family friends, extended extended family), they have very graciously offered to throw us a second reception.

So ta da!

And I find it incredibly close-minded to say I'm "engaged but not really". Are you trying to tell me my fiancé didn't ask me to marry him? Or are you saying you're not really getting married unless you have a diamond ring?

Rosie109

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ive-waiting-years-join-boards?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:909aa58a-c02b-43ae-8d8f-ad3ed3b298daPost:6e71263f-989a-4d92-ae7a-406898380040">Re: I've been waiting years to join these boards!</a>:
[QUOTE]Wow, you guys are mean.  What is wrong with having 2 receptions if they are in different states?  People do it all the time with destination weddings. And I don't know what is lamer ... lurking or having 15000+ posts on a message board. . WAIT! I do know which one is lamer.
Posted by SugarBrideOct10[/QUOTE]

I can't wait until you get married and never come back.

louisvillebride21

I will say that in all the crazy that this all contains, it's not so cool to say she's not engaged because she doesnt' have a ring yet.

Unless she's a troll. Then, please continue on.

Rosie109

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ive-waiting-years-join-boards?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:909aa58a-c02b-43ae-8d8f-ad3ed3b298daPost:b7af2831-a9d4-4faa-8457-58ed72ead3fb">Re: I've been waiting years to join these boards!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I've been waiting years to join these boards! : How welcoming!
Posted by SugarBrideOct10[/QUOTE]

That is exactly what I was going for!

[Deleted User]

No, I said engaged but not really because it sounded to me like OP has been planning the wedding for years regardless of being asked. I don't care if you have a ring or not, the ring doesn't make you engaged, I agree.

But if you are officially engaged, then congrats.

lizarellie

As far as having one big reception goes, we want to get married on their land. It's gorgeous. Rolling Iowan hills with a beautiful garden backed right up to the forest preserve behind them. And it's within our budget.

And I guess I'm still trying to figure out how we're going to go about the second reception. 

My ideal wedding would be a courthouse wedding, and then dinner with only our closest family, but my fiancé wants something more traditional. Neither of us are religious, so the ceremony really isn't the important part. We just want to get up, say we love each other and that we want to be together always while our family watches on.

Maybe I should stop calling it a "second reception". Maybe a reverse engagement party? We DO want it to be a family reunion, which is half the reason they want to throw it for us.

Birdie1483

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ive-waiting-years-join-boards?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:909aa58a-c02b-43ae-8d8f-ad3ed3b298daPost:cd01a093-a4d7-40eb-9b4b-17ada8a1568b">Re: I've been waiting years to join these boards!</a>:
[QUOTE]I haven't read these boards as of late, but I see it's reputation of snarky brides continues on.
Posted by lizarellie[/QUOTE]

That's actually a few doors down. We're just biitches here.

andy71781

Call it a famly reunion or a backyard party.  I think you sound legit - if not a bit over eager.  I remember how crazy I was when I got engaged.  Don't call it a reverse engagement party.

georgia_bride09

So a pretty backdrop is more important than having your friends and family there. Okay.

Reverse engagement party sounds dumb.