Stop me from eating all the Doritos

AmoroAgain

Give me a funny story here instead. 

squirrly

I've got nothing funny.  I'm having a shit-tastic day so far.  Pass the damn doritos, will ya?

lilgina64

I ate 3 of those HUGE bags of doritos last week.. over the course of 2 days... Then I wanted to kill myself because that was the most awful thing I could have ever done to my insides haha.

I have no funny stories otherwise, but thank you for reminding me to eat my clementine instead of running out for doritos.

goheels05

Someone either got a care package or went to the American food store.

A company that I own stock in is about to cancel all of their existing shares, so all of my stock will go from being worth 0.16 cents (not 16 cents, 0.16 cents) to nothing.  Funny right?  ha ha ha ha?  Sorry.  That's all I got.

AmoroAgain

Ah ha!  We did not go to the American store!  They were in the Presbyran!  We were shocked and had to buy them.

Thanks guys... you're so not full of the funny. lol

Stackeye210

That just reminded me that Mr Stack ate ALL of the Doritos out of the lunch variety chip bag.  I was stuck with BBQ chips today.  YUCK. 

Hmmmm, funny story.  Well it's not funny so much, but here's a story.  BIL and his gf just moved in together.  They're expecting a child in May and are trying to show everyone how responsible they are.  So they invited his family and her family over for dinner on Saturday night. 

We walk in and get instant headaches by all of the febreze and plug in air freshners through out.  Dinner was actually good other then having headaches.  Well at the end of dinner I go to wipe my face with a papertowel and get an instant contact buzz.  It smelled like straight marijauna!  So basically they smoked out their entire house before we came and tried to drown it in air freshner.  I made Mr Stack smell my papertowel, so then he went and got one to see if it smelled that bad and it totally did. 

Yep, they're so ready to have a kid!  They also thought up until last week that she had had 6 ultra sounds (meaning one every appointment she went to), but really it was just the doctor putting on the heart monitor, she actually hadn't had ANY ultra sounds yet. 

sarabellam

So Stack, she's smoking weed while she's pregnant? Not cool.

SwedishChick2011

Are you in Sweden or Italy right now?  So they really have an American store, huh?  Well, since America has international stores, I guess that makes sense. 

AmoroAgain

She's uh... special. 

AmoroAgain

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_stop-eating-doritos?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:95c04689-f727-41bc-b2d8-e3e347eba342Post:8e93bba0-4ac9-4ec1-9792-15efecada4f4">Re: Stop me from eating all the Doritos</a>:
[QUOTE]Are you in Sweden or Italy right now?  So they really have an American store, huh?  Well, since America has international stores, I guess that makes sense. 
Posted by cocoreo3[/QUOTE]

We're still in Sweden.  I haven't yet found an American store in Italy, but I hear they exist in larger cities.

kikibaby

Yeah, seriously, stack?  Smoking pot while preggo is not cool at all.  Why is it so easy for such irresponsible people to have kids?

sarabellam

Oh, sorry, I didn't relate anything funny. Hmmmm, I got nuthin'. My husband earned double bonus brownie points this weekend for doing laundry this weekend, without being asked, WHILE he was suffering from a nasty man-cold.

Stackeye210

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_stop-eating-doritos?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:95c04689-f727-41bc-b2d8-e3e347eba342Post:7af795d4-ea6e-4fba-85ff-de2b8a12c930">Re: Stop me from eating all the Doritos</a>:
[QUOTE]So Stack, she's smoking weed while she's pregnant? Not cool.
Posted by sarabellam[/QUOTE]

I don't know if she is smoking or not.  But I do know their house at one point was so smokey the papertowels even smell like smoke.  So either way it's still unhealthy for the baby.  And they just moved into the apartment a few weeks ago, so it isn't like the smell was from before she was pregnant. 

Stackeye210

They're just a "special" couple all the way around.  She also took the morning after pill about 10 days after they "messed up". 

SwedishChick2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_stop-eating-doritos?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:95c04689-f727-41bc-b2d8-e3e347eba342Post:6ef7098c-810a-49bd-bb4c-4b90e0f6b7ca">Re: Stop me from eating all the Doritos</a>:
[QUOTE]Yeah, seriously, stack?  Smoking pot while preggo is not cool at all.  Why is it so easy for such irresponsible people to have kids?
Posted by kikibaby[/QUOTE]
Probably because they are irresponsible - less likely to use birth control etc.  Some people should just be sterilized.

AmoroAgain

Ooooh man.

I have one!  Which is kind of ironic rather than funny, but...

In Italy, you can buy good wine for practically nothing, and you can get it from anywhere, at any time.

In Sweden, it's heavily regulated.  You can only purchase alcohol from the government operated liqour stores, that are open only certain hours and they are few and far between. 

I like the difference from where we've been living to where we will be living. lol

SwedishChick2011

I don't have a funny story, but I'm keeping my fingers crossed that DH has the house at least semi-cleaned up by the time I get home.  I do most of the cleaning, but I've been a real slacker for the past week not feeling well, so he said he'd do it.  There's trash and dirty dishes and laundry all over the place and I hate that.  Yuck.

Stackeye210

Is that any alcohol?  Like even beer included?  That'd be rough.

AmoroAgain

Mm.. .I think you can buy beer in stores still, but I'm not sure.  I don't drink beer so I haven't paid attention to it really.

beatlesgirl25

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_stop-eating-doritos?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:95c04689-f727-41bc-b2d8-e3e347eba342Post:25a93017-614e-434d-87d9-445fdb10334b">Re: Stop me from eating all the Doritos</a>:
[QUOTE]They're just a "special" couple all the way around.  <strong>She also took the morning after pill about 10 days after they "messed up". </strong>
Posted by Stackeye210[/QUOTE]

I would laugh at this if it weren't so sad. Did she think she got the week and a half after pill instead of the morning after one? Good lord people.

Amoro, your Doritos may all be gone by now, but here's something mildly amusing. I helped a guy friend go cologne shopping the other day (he's single and wants help attracting the ladies). So we went to Sephora, found a few favorites, and sprayed each on a couple different points on his arms and hands to see how they would smell on him later. Then we walked around the mall a bit to combat the nasal fatigue, and eventually stepped out into a little enclave so we could do the smell test on his arms. He was writing notes as we were sniffing his elbows and whatnot. A couple minutes later, we see across the way a Japanese restaurant, and all the employees were in the doorway. They had been standing there watching us the whole time. There was really nothing to do but wave and walk away. I'm sure we looked odd and crazy.

betrothed123

Mmmm Doritos....

I have a story, although not very funny.

One of the people that works for my company is being fired today.  Why?  He stole thousands of dollars worth of product from us.  How did we find out?  We regularly search Ebay for our products.  One of the reasons we do this is because we have authorized dealers that sell via Ebay, and in order ot be an authorized dealer with our company you have to sign a contract stating you will charge MSRP for our products.  So my coworker searches Ebay this morning for our company name and comes across a listing where the seller has a large quantity of one of our products, and is selling at about half price.

So my coworker tells our facilities guy about the seller, and the facilities guy watches the videos from our cameras.  He sees the employee walking out of the office with handfuls of the products.  So he confronts the employee, who admits to it and says he did it because we don't pay him enough to support his heroin habit.

So where does the funny part come in?  This guy's boss tried this crap last year.  He stole about $30,000 worth of product and sold it on Ebay.  EVERYONE in that building was informed that cameras were going up, and that he would be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.  Frickin idiot.

goheels05

Holy cow, betrothed!

betrothed123

Yeah, that guy is an idiot.  In fact, both of them were.  They had pretty good jobs, awesome job security, and make quite a bit of money (I used to work in the same position as the guy who will be leaving us today).  I think he sold 1 of them, so I hope that little bit of money was worth it.