Wedding Etiquette Forum

Long venty and whiny

Warning, this is a long, venty, LJ type post.

I feel a little tragic writing this, but the truth of the matter is that without my realizing it, P&E has become one of my best friends. I don't necessarily post much, but I do read almost all the posts and I respond when I have something to add.

This has been a rough week at work so I've been off board and I've missed y'all. A lot. DH is out of town for the week (this is pretty normal, he'll be gone next week as well) and we have done nothing but fight. The first fight was on Tuesday and it was about the holidays. Our New Years plans fell through and our back up plans (which I thought were fine) he kept taking off the table and blaming me for. It was a communication clusterfuck to the nth degree. I don't think we've ever had a failure of communication quite as bad as that. Normally I'm the first to say I may have overreacted or been a bad communicator, but this time I'm really saying I think it's mostly him.

Last night he called and I was upset/venting to him about work and he interrupted me mid-sentence to make a joke/movie reference. Really? Can you not hear that I'm upset? Yes yes, I know he was "just trying to lighten the mood" but I felt totally deflated and like he wasn't taking me seriously at all.

It boils down to this: while he is an amazing man/partner/best friend, he is not always the right person for me to go to when I just need a shoulder to cry on. And yes, I knew that going in.  I accept that because he's awesome in every other way. It's just that this week I could have really used a supportive friend to just listen and (quite depressingly) I realized I didn't have any. Which left me feeling quite lonely, really.

End sad venty post.

Re: Long venty and whiny

  • Oh Manda, I'm so sorry you have such a rough week :( Obviously, if I was there right now I'd be grabbing your boobs. 
  • Bring your cats and come to my house is the obvious answer to this situation...
  • Ditto your first paragraph, I feel that way about P&E as well, though I post way less than you.

    I'm so sorry you feel this way, but I can certainly empathize.  I think we are all pretty aware of the things that we sacrifice in order to enjoy the overwhelming amount of positives that our partner brings to our relationship.  However sometimes when those few sacrifices slap you in the face, it really hurts.

    We're here for you!

    JGY
    Married to my amazing wife 6/12/10. TTC since 6/11. Unmedicated IUI #1 - 6/28/11 - BFN Unmedicated IUI #2 - 7/25/11 - BFN Robotic Myomectomy (Fibroid Surgery) - 11/15/11 Unmedicated IUI #3 - 4/24/12 - BFN (effed up RE protocol) Progesterone Supported Leuteal Phase IUI #4 - 6/21/12 - BFP!! Baby Boy Due 3/14/13 BabyFruit Ticker
  • Aw, thanks Julez! I'll just close my eyes and imagine you are here grabbing my boobs. Wait, what?

    Katie that's not a terrible idea. We should certainly hang out again!

  • That blows, Manda.  Communication failures are the suck.  Haha, I made two BJ references. 

    Oops, sorry, I shouldn't be joking.  We're here for you!
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_long-venty-whiny?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:973deef2-1872-4820-9307-616f5011e277Post:11cab68e-9813-4d1a-9b16-0f5c8e8df214">Re: Long venty and whiny</a>:
    [QUOTE] think we are all pretty aware of the things that we sacrifice in order to enjoy the overwhelming amount of positives that our partner brings to our relationship.  However sometimes when those few sacrifices slap you in the face, it really hurts.
    Posted by JGY[/QUOTE]

    Wow, well said!
  • I think you're awesome if that helps at all...we need to hang out some more after the holiday craziness has subsided.
  • Aww. Well, men sometimes don't get the same cues as we do. Don't be too hard on him. My H and I don't fight much but I remember our first big fight. It was over the color of my wedding dress. Looking back it was very stupid. You two will realize the same thing too! And, we still have a few weeks to go before NYE so maybe more plans will come up. Feel better.
    image
  • Kate - If Manda goes to your place, could you grab her boobs for me since I'm not there?
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_long-venty-whiny?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:973deef2-1872-4820-9307-616f5011e277Post:4a164e93-3ff5-4818-a46b-1ffcb6bb6087">Re: Long venty and whiny</a>:
    [QUOTE]Kate - If Manda goes to your place, could you grab her boobs for me since I'm not there?
    Posted by julezlee[/QUOTE]

    Oh shiit, know what I just realized Julez? We will be going to NY for Christmas. Want to grab my boobs for reals??
  • Manda, I know exactly how you feel.  Your too far away for a sleepover, but you're loved!  You can talk to me anytime (I will try not to tune out mid-conversation either - promise).
  • YOU'RE COMING TO NY FOR CHRISTMAS??


    Why is this the first I'm hearing of this?  When are you coming?  What are you doing?  Wanna hang out?

  • Julez I have a meeting and then I'm PMing you. Wait, screw the meeting I'm PMing you first.

    And to everyone in this thread- thanks. I actually do feel a little better just having the opportunity to vent. You're all awesome.
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