Wedding Etiquette Forum

Are you doing anything for your FMIL/MIL for Mother's Day?

We have plans with my mom for brunch in the morning so FI checked in with his parents to see if anything was being planned to make sure we could do everything/see everyone on the day.  They don't have anything organized so we'll likely just swing by on the way back up to road to visit for an hour or so.

Of course FI is giving his mother a card.  I was just at the store getting cards for my own reasons and noticed they have a lot of generalized Mother's Day cards now, not just for your birth mom.  
Are you getting a card like this or flowers for your FMIL?  I'm struggling to decide if I think it'd come off as a nice gesture of being excited/happy to have her as a MIL or awkward and out of place like I'm trying to share in/take FI's thunder (not that I would he IS her son but you know what I mean..)
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Re: Are you doing anything for your FMIL/MIL for Mother's Day?

  • We probably will.  Apparently H's aunt and uncle are also in town that weekend so we'll also get to see them!

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  • H and I have always signed both names to gifts and cards.  We live on opposite coasts as our parents, so we mailed gifts for Mothers Day and my dad's birthday.  One gift from both of us, both names signed to the cards.
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  • MIL will be out of town for Mother's Day, so we're going to my parents' for the weekend. Although, even if she weren't going to be out of town, I doubt we'd do anything different. I follow H's lead on that. If he buys a card, I sign it. If he calls, I say hello too.
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  • MIL planned a BBQ at my house. Sweet, right?  I'm making a copper/bead thing (kind of hard to explain) for my mom, and I'm not sure what we're getting his mom.  We'll probably go in on something with the BIL.
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  • My mom and MIL can't play nice together, so we have it worked out that I take my mom out for brunch and H goes out with his mom.  I'm going to run out Saturday and pick up a card (from us) and flowers for H to take with him.  Because he'll forget to do that.
  • Okay, we'll just stick to one card signed by both of us, that's probably the best route to go.
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  • We're going to my MIL's for breakfast on Saturday, and then back to CT to go out to lunch with my mom on Sunday.  We usually give each mother a card and gift, from both of us.  He gets his mother a gift, I get my mom one, but they are gifts from both of us.
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  • MRSBJSMRSBJS member
    First Comment

    I don't have my mom anymore, but I won't be doing anything for my MIL. 

    I told my husband that Mother's Day is Sunday, so my part is done. 

  • I ordered some flowers for FMIL and signed the card from FI & myself. My mom will be getting flowers and a book from both of us. I don't think we'll be spending time with their mother on Sunday as it isn't possible to see both in one day....
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  • edited May 2011
    So far we have ordered edible arrangements for both mothers to be delivered on Saturday.  We might stop by and see them depending on our schedules.

    I'm not a huge fan of flowers either so I love that our gifts is useful and yummy. It has chocolate dipped strawberries and all kids of fruit. We got one for my mom for her birthday last year and she loved it.

    ETA: Oh and the cards are both signed from both of us.
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  • I sent my mom flowers. She's having a hard week, so I think it helped cheer her up, getting them early. I'm not always able to do that, but I like to when I can. They were from the 3 of us (including Max, of course).
    She's also had a terrible infection in her toe - she had MRSA 2 years ago, and it's the same toe. She's down about that.
    I did try to pawn him off on her, though, since he's got a terrible twos streak running right now. She didn't fall for it.

    J's mom is deceased. In the past, they'd taken his aunt to lunch, but he never got that. She's the one who got mad because we got married where she couldn't  go and she deserved to go.
    We won't be in town this weekend, though. They'll go without him/us.
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  • edited May 2011
    I am such a bad daughter and DIL. I didn't even send the Mom's cards or anything. We used to do the Mother's Day brunch thing growing up and I would love to treat the Mom's to one, but the distance (only a bit longer) makes it impossible.

    Edit: we will definitely call both of them
  • We started joint cards and presents as soon as we moved in with each other. I've already bought the present for my mom (Dr. Who first season!)

    We always have a barbecue dinner at my parents' house with my parents and sister's family for mother's day. Dh's family is trickier because his parents are often at their vacation cottage and that's too far for us to split the day with my parents. This year, we're meeting his parents Friday night for a dinner. We need to get his mom a present tonight.
  • We're planning to do a bbq at our house so that way they can both come to us and we can all hang out.  Plus since they both live in opposite directions from us this seems pretty fair and fun.  And since my brother is driving truck over the road w/ my dad I'm the only kid home to celebrate with my mom and didn't want her to feel awkward if we did the day over at FI's parent's house as opposed to ours.

    The gifts come from both of us (for awhile now)
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  • we see both our mothers and just get a gift/card from the both of us... they live too far apart to really split the day so we're seeing my mom saturday and his on sunday... i've never gotten FMIL anything specifically from me, i'd feel odd doing that, but just sharing something works.  And I usually just end up picking out the gifts for both of them anyway.  I also send my stepmother a card/gift and we both sign our names to that too.
  • In FI's family, almost any occasion just calls for a card. And we've always done joint-signed cards. If we were going to be in town, we'd probably have a small family get together just to open cards and have some cake or something. But this year we'll be visiting my mom, so it'll just be the card. And a phone call, of course.

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  • my mom got a card (signed from both) and flowers (from us both).  all grandmothers got cards signed by both of us.

    FI mom passed away so nothing to do there but be sad. 
  • I will buy a card for my Mom and we all will sign it and mail it out on Saturday - it will get there late, but my family is like that LOL. 

    I have no clue if my FMIL is alive or dead and neither does FH - she decided she wanted to be free of a hubby and six kids when FH was 13, so she left.  So, no. 
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  • I wrote a note on the inside of FMIL's card about how excited I am to be her daughter-in-law, and how wonderful I think she is. It's just a nice thing to do, plus she's awesome and has totally taken me under her wing as a daughter.  I couldn't ask for a better FMIL and i definitely wanted her to know that =)
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  • I mailed a copy of "How I Planned Your Wedding" by Susan Wiggs to both FMIL and my Mom.  I laughed and cried while reading this book and shared so much of it with my fiance that he feels like he practically read it too.  

    I figured with the wedding so close that both mother's could use a good read to unwind with.  :-) 
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  • leia1979leia1979 member
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    edited May 2011
    I bought my mom some shoes. She lives close to us, so I'll go visit and deliver my gift.

    I don't know if FI got anything for his mom (who lives 2000 miles away). Probably not, but I'm sure he'll call her.

    I always saw my mom having to get stuff for my dad's mother because my dad wouldn't. I'm not going to do that. Either FI gets stuff for his parents or it doesn't happen.

    ETA: If I sound heartless, well, I kind of am, but I've also only ever met FI's parents twice.
  • MIL is getting flowers from DH, SIL and me.  Mom is getting flowers delivered to her at work tomorrow from DH and me.

    Unoriginal, yes, but we live twelve time zones away and they both simply love flowers.
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