Possible Pregnant bridesmaid

Katienorth

Hi All- My MOH is concered that she may be pregnant on my wedding day.. she wanted to know what I thought about the dress I picked in that event.. it sounds like she wants a style of dress that will conform to a pregnant belly just in case.. I want to keep the dresses I picked and told her that in the event that she is pregnant, we will just have to add fabric to make it work.

Did I handle that well??

J&K10910

You can't always just "add fabric to make it work."

I'd talk to a seamstress to see if that's possible.  If it is, and your MOH is ok with that, then awesome.  If not, I'd consider letting her pick a similar but more adaptable dress.  As the MOH, it will look like it was planned for her to have a different dress.

MrsGandthebeag

Honestly I'd let her pick out something in tha same color she feels comfortable in.  She's your MOH.  It's ok if she doesn't match.

banana468

If your wedding is 11 mo away, pick a dress when you're 6 mo from the wedding.  If she's going to be very far along, you'll need a maternity gown and no amount of 'just add fabric' will work unless you're going to be paying a seamstress to deconstruct and reconstruct the garment out of your pocket.  

lyndausvi

My BFF got pregnant 8 months before my wedding.  

What I told her was "pick out a dress from the same designer, in in the same color, fabric (or close enough) and length.".

Her dress was a little different, but it still looked great.


Or if you want you can tell ALL the BM to do the same.  

jessicabessica

It seems like it might be kind of early to pick dresses.  According to your profile, your wedding is in June 2013.  I would let her pick a dress that she would be comfortable in if she were pregnant, though.

andrea2473

You know the answer to this.   Pregnant woman's comfort > Matching dresses.

One of my bridesmaids was due 2 weeks after my wedding and yes, I told her to wear/do whatever she wanted.    So I'm not talking out of my asss. 

katehar01

Yea, I would just wait and try to order the dresses like 4-5 months before the wedding.  By then, if she's not pregnant, even if she does get pregnant between then and the wedding it'll be less of an issue with fit.  Besides, even for the other girls it's nice to wait - people may gain or lose weight, etc.  Or, order them now and let her pick and different style.  My MOH is wearing a different dress, it's NBD.

Keep in mind that if you're really set on this dress and make her order it, and there are some crazy alterations necessary when the time comes, you'll need to pay for them.

runpipparun

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_possible-pregnant-bridesmaid?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9cdc39fa-5a21-4caa-bf42-a11b43bf81a7Post:732663ab-c43a-46ef-939e-e7a55a515026">Re: Possible Pregnant bridesmaid</a>:
[QUOTE]No.  Let her pick a dress that matches length, color, and fabric (and designer, if possible) that will allow for her shape.  <strong>Come on, dude.</strong> 
Posted by EaglesBride2012[/QUOTE]

<div>My thoughts, exactly. In the words of that ESPN segment, "Come on, man."</div>

DramaGeek

I agree with those who say to wait a while.  You only need a lead time of 8-12 weeks on BM dresses, so wait until you're 5-6 months out and see where things stand.  If she's pregnant at that point, consider a different dress for everyone or let her choose a different dress and keep the original for the other girls.  If she's not pregnant, you're likely safe with the original dress.

angryangry

My awesome story is that I was a BM and the bride insisted on us buying dresses 11 months before the wedding. I gained about 25 lbs (eek!) and ended up having to order a larger size a few months before the wedding. I didn't even have to put a rush order on the second dress, because 11 months is so much time that someone could gain 25 lbs and then order an entire second dress without having to rush order it. Plus I got the second one in time to allow a month for alterations. 

I only ended up being able to sell the dress for about half of the original price, because the designer was discontinuing it, so the stores had it for a huge discount also. So basically my costs were increased 150% because the bride was nervous and wanted to have things tied down really far in advance. These things do not just affect pregnant women. 

tlal1026

My daughter will be 8 months pregnant on my wedding day and she is my MOH. Maternity dresses are not easy to find. You can not just get a bigger size in a regular dress, it doesn't work that way. Wait till you know for sure she is pregnant figure out how far along she will be and let her pick something she will be comfortable in. You do not want an unconfortable pregnant MOH. You can add something to the dress to match the other girls.  

ericaandtom2012

1) As other PPs have stated, it's too early to be getting dresses.  You should probably wait until you're, at most, 6 months out.

2) She's not even pregnant yet.  Cross that bridge when you get there.  If she is going to be pregnant at your wedding, be flexible and make sure she's comfortable, even if that means a different dress than the other BMs.  

WildMagelet

This is why I'm only picking length + color.

Let her pick something she'll be comfortable in.  BM dresses don't need to be matchy-matchy. 

Fancypantsamy

OP, I saw pictures of a pregnant friend in a wedding recently where her sister insisted that she just get her dress fixed with extra fabric. 

Trust me, you're paying a lot for your photographs. Let your possibly pregnant BM pick a maternity dress. The results of that other brides mistake WERE NOT PRETTY. The MOH looked like a stuffed sausage in the dress, which relied on a defined waistline to look good. During the ceremony every picture that included the MOH made her look so uncomfortable, pecause it was also hard to keep the dress up after all those alterations and the rest of our friends' major comments when seeing the photos were all along the lines of "WTF didn't she let her MOH choose a better fitting dress? Does she have eyes?" rather than the usual "Aww, how beautiful!"

Don't let that be you!