Divorced parents-dad not helping

txin1

My daughter is getting married next June and her father is not helping with any of the costs (we are divorced).  My girl still wants her dad to walk her down the aisle though.  How should I handle invites since her step-dad and I are paying for everything?  Bio-dad is bringing his new wife and kid to the wedding too so I will be feeding and entertaining the whole family while he sits back with a full wallet.  Ugh...what to do?

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

Honestly, the first thing you should do is get over the "fairness" of it all. You offered her the money for the wedding. You can only control your own actions, not those of your ex.

Some people include their parents names on the invitation whether the parents are paying or not. I'd ask your daughter what she wants to do and have her double check the wording with both you and her father. If her father insists on having his name on the invitation, let it go. If he's okay with the wedding just being hosted by you, that's fine as well. 

Most people list their parents in the program, regardless of who is hosting or paying.

twilight.rose

"Together With Their Parents" or "Together With Their Families" seem to be the best fit for your situation.

ootmother2

how about

Mr. and Mrs. your name & DH
and
Mr. and Mrs. exH and DW

request the honour of your presence

at the marriage of Mary Ann Doe

on,


etc.

Yes, it's techinically correct to write

Mr. and Mrs. your name & DH

request the honour, etc.

but it will probably cause more problems than you or your daughter need.

Have you asked her about her preference?  I'd start there

pinkfleurdelys

my dad is not paying a dime towards my sister's wedding (it might take money away from his model train set...)  he didn't really contribute to her first wedding either...

sounds like you've got issues with your ex that have nothing to do with who pays for what for your daughter's wedding.  let your daughter decide how she wants her invites worded and where she wants everyone to sit. go with it and don't hold a grudge, or don't pay.  you're punishing your daughter for what she wants, not your ex.  and he's the person you're really mad at.

ivygarland

When I got married the first time, my dad contributed very little, but I still put his name on the invitation as

Ms. Mom of Bride
and
Mr. Dad of Bride and Mrs. Stepmom of Bride

request the honor of your presence etc.

It's perfectly fine to not put his name if he isn't paying, but perhaps putting your name first would be the more gracious thing.