Seating question

AllisonW423

Hello all!

I have a question about seating for my wedding party at the reception. There are twelve people in our wedding party. Each of them will be have the opportunity to bring a SO or date to the wedding. FI and I would prefer to have a wedding party table with all 14 of us rather than a sweetheart table so that we aren't as "on display," but I'm worried about the wedding party's SO/dates.

Some of the SO/dates will know other people and will be comfortable sitting apart from the wedding party for the long (four-course) dinner, but some will not know anyone, and I don't want them to have a bad time or feel awkward- after all, they will be solo for the ceremony already. If we do go with a wedding party table, I would absolutely have a pre-wedding get-together for all of the wedding party and their respective dates so that everyone will get to know each other better, but having a one-night get together might not completely solve this problem.

I've also thought about having a "feasting table," a long table that would sit the whole bridal party and their dates. Everyone would be sitting face-to-face though (like a regular table I guess), so the guests wouldn't be able to see me and FI as well. I was excited about this idea, but my mother (aka wedding financier) vetoed it because apparently she wants to see my face the whole night .

What is the proper etiquette for this situation? Also, what have other people done for wedding party seating?

Mrs.B6302007

Pick the seating that allows for everyone to sit with a date/SO.

kcscejal

Either sit the wedding party's dates at the head table or have a sweetheart table.  We picked sweetheart table.  Whatver you pick make it an option where the wedding party gets to sit with their dates.

Maggie0829

Sit at a round table with you, your hubby, your MOH and her date and his BM and his date.  Then have the rest of the bridal party at nearby tables.  This way you will still sit with some of your WP but your WP will not be separated from their SOs.

AllisonW423

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_seating-question-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:a198bd2d-8f57-4eab-bd3f-c03722df65e4Post:8feb9f34-9015-4a91-b7aa-b7a1f725b8e6">Re: Seating question</a>:
[QUOTE]Sit at a round table with you, your hubby, your MOH and her date and his BM and his date.  Then have the rest of the bridal party at nearby tables.  This way you will still sit with some of your WP but your WP will not be separated from their SOs.
Posted by Maggie0829[/QUOTE]

Love this idea! It is questionable that the BM will invite a date, so would that look strange if he was solo and the MOH was paired up? My wedding isn't until May, so it is possible that he will find a lovely lady that he deems "askable" by then, but I know the BM <em>very </em>well and think it is doubtful.

Thanks for all of the opinions.

MattsPenguin

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_seating-question-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a198bd2d-8f57-4eab-bd3f-c03722df65e4Post:8feb9f34-9015-4a91-b7aa-b7a1f725b8e6">Re: Seating question</a>:
[QUOTE]Sit at a round table with you, your hubby, your MOH and her date and his BM and his date.  Then have the rest of the bridal party at nearby tables.  This way you will still sit with some of your WP but your WP will not be separated from their SOs.
Posted by Maggie0829[/QUOTE]

This is what we did.  My husband hates any sort of attention, so we had a table of eight (B&G, MOH's and dates, Best Man and wife).  Then the rest of our party was at the neighboring tables.  This also allowed our WP to mingle with other guests, and for my friend with a 10 month old to have her daughter AND sit with her mother.

Regardless, the WP must sit with their dates.  That is proper etiquette.

cebrady89

I actually don't think it's that awful to separate your WP from their dates for dinner. It's only for an hour, they should be fine, and I'm sure they know that sitting separately is a possibility given that their SO is part of the wedding.

I think the sweetheart table idea is better than having you sit with only part of your wedding party and having others nearby, if you decide to not do a standard head table.