Reception help, please!!!

kolendamm

My fiance and I are on a tight budget and we've cut so many people from our guest list to save on the cost of food.  I was at a wedding about 5 years ago that actually started 2 hours earlier than what our invitation stated.  The bride and groom had just their close family and friends at the dinner portion and then the remaining friends and family were invited 2 hours later for dancing and drinks.  Is it rude to do that?  We have so many close friends and family that we're already over our budget and can't cut anymore...and we still have more close family and friends that have been cut.  Is it possible to pull something like this off without offending people?  And how do I ask the reception hall to setup extra tables and chairs without them charging us for the extra food if the extra guests won't be coming for food?  Thanks!

AllAboutTheBenjamin

Yeah.  That's rude as hell.  And no, probably not possible to "pull it off without offending people."

dumdumfroggie

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_reception-please?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:aeaa5a35-27eb-42f5-9437-2d31607e0859Post:eacb7424-2a2b-493f-9fae-9d36e7351314">Reception help, please!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]My fiance and I are on a tight budget and we've cut so many people from our guest list to save on the cost of food.  I was at a wedding about 5 years ago that actually started 2 hours earlier than what our invitation stated.  The bride and groom had just their close family and friends at the dinner portion and then the remaining friends and family were invited 2 hours later for dancing and drinks. <strong> Is it rude to do that? </strong> We have so many close friends and family that we're already over our budget and can't cut anymore...and we still have more close family and friends that have been cut.  <strong>Is it possible to pull something like this off without offending people? </strong> And <strong>how do I ask the reception hall to setup extra tables and chairs without them charging us for the extra food if the extra guests won't be coming for food? </strong> Thanks!
Posted by kolendamm[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>1.  Yes.  This is what's called a tiered reception and it's very rude.\</div><div>
</div><div>2.  No.</div><div>
</div><div>3.  You don't</div><div>
</div>

kolendamm

That's what I thought, but wanted others people's opinions so I can tell my future hubby no. Thanks for the help!

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

You can have a reception that's not during a meal time, and then serve either cake and punch, or hors d'oeuvres but not a meal to all your guests. That kind of wedding is usually from about 2-5pm or 8pm+.

rebarobert2012

Yes, this would be considered very rude, and people would most likely be offended.

blush64

I know you already received your answers but I did want to add something.

I went to a wedding like this three years ago. We arrived at the reception thinking it was a private ceremony only to find that it wasn't, we just hadn't been invited. My FI was very upset as that was his good friend. A short while after dinner another friend arrived who had been invited to the "after-dinner" party.

Neither my FI or the other friend called the groom very much after that. It appeared he didn't value their friendship and through those actions lost at least two good friends.