Wedding Etiquette Forum

Dont want kids at my wedding...

So far, I know I can't afford to pay to feed a bunch of kids.  Yet, if the people we invite, can't find a sitter, we want them to come onyway and we'll find a way to budget it in.  Any ideas on how to word the invitation so that people understand it's not that we don't love their kids... it's just we can't afford to feed them???

Re: Dont want kids at my wedding...

  • You only invite the adults by putting only their names on the invitation. But if you leave kids off, you stand the chance that the parents will decline. It comes with the territory. If you're willing to cave if people complain, it sucks for the people who didn't complain and had to pay for a sitter. They'll be wondering why they had to shell out for a sitter, but the squeaky wheels didn't. Either stick to your guns and learn to say "I'm sorry, but the invitation is only for you and your husband/wife. We hope you can still make it," or be willing to accomodate all children. That's just my opinion, though. 

    And FYI, kids cost less to feed usually. Our kid meals (chicken strips and fries) were only $10 compared to the $32 charge for adults.
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  • It's gotta be either kids or no kids... Not "oh well they couldn't find a sitter." That will really piss off those who DID find a sitter.  If you want to provide a sitter - that might work.

    You don't "word" your invite any particular way, just address it to ONLY the people you are inviting.  
  • Unfortunately, you're going to have to learn how to say sorry they can't come or accommodate all. We're only having pb kids and nursing infants.

    I feel your pain about not being able to afford kids - we're at $40 per kid over 4yrs old. And we're having a modest affair by my area's standards. Dreading those calls - I have over 20 and half are under 4 the other half over. We're probably going to try to find a sitter. Although I realize still not a popular option.
  • It has to be all or nothing.  We went to a wedding last year that we were told No Kids, so had to find a sitter for my son (which, by the way, the wedding was in a different state than where we lived!). So we went thru the headache of finding a sitter only to show up and see kids.  It was really frustrating.

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  • Does your venue charge full plate price for children under a certain age?  Many do not, since a 6 year old isn't going to eat a full adult portion (and will probably just eat off their parents' plate and be fine).  Ask if there's an age cutoff where children won't be counted in your meal price.  Also, can you possibly provide a sitter?  Depends on the venue, I know, but consider your guest list and who's traveling to be there you might want to offer one.  I've been to weddings where the children were busy in an adjacent room, and everyone had a good time.
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  • motherfreakingfrucker.  There have been 829823749629387039475926349872948593 versions of this question in the past week.  Scroll the fuuck down and read.
  • Awww, that's the snippy I know and love.
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  • I thought you loved the new, nice me!
  • I love 'em both. As long as it's not directed at me. :)
    Vacation with Alix, Andy, Mandy, and FLORENCE. AND HER MACHINE.

    The Margarita Evolution
  • LOL @ Amoro... Love that.
  • I was just about to post on this! 

    Probably a dumb question: No kids at wedding means no kids in wedding party?
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  • We are doing no kids, only exception, wedding party children. If guests don't like it, they don't have to come. Period.

    Who are you to judge the life I live? I know I'm not perfect and I don't live to be. But, before you start pointing fingers, make sure your hands are clean. -Bob Marley

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