Wedding Etiquette Forum

So, I'm getting married in an hr...

For those of you may remember (probably not many ha ha)--I've had issues in trying to plan my wedding to FI who recently joined the air force. We went from planning a winter wedding (jan-marchish 2011), to small intimate wedding in Oct. 2010, to now full blown all extended family invited wedding on Oct. 9th 2010. (We found out in Aug. that he was shipping off on Oct. 12th).

THEN, we found out we couldnt legally get married on the 9th (per his recruiter) because his paperwork wouldnt be processed in time for Basic Military Training.

THUS. I am about to legally wed FI in abt an hr from now...
We decided to keep the religious aspect and legal aspects as seperate as possible and are reserving our vows for the Oct. 9th shindig. All important parties know what is going on, etc.

BUT, because we are being married by a Chaplain, he wanted us to do the legal signing at his church. I don't know what to wear....
I'm thinking simple black dress and teal sandle/pumps?

Anywho, I'm feeling jittery. Just thought I'd share:D
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Re: So, I'm getting married in an hr...

  • Best wishes!
  • I remember you! Good luck - your outfit sounds lovely :^)
  • Wrkn925Wrkn925 member
    5 Love Its First Comment
    edited October 2010
    I remember, best of luck!

    Wear whatever you are comfortable with.
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  • I remember too.  I still think your recruiter is full of it.  :)  But, I don't blame you for your choice.  Best of luck, and wear something you love - you can wear it out to dinner on a future anniversary!
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_im-getting-married-hr?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:b33952b1-4cc8-4bb8-b2c3-6087f45286eePost:8ebd7d30-3e25-492f-854a-fbdc4713cd81">Re: So, I'm getting married in an hr...</a>:
    [QUOTE]I remember too.  I still think your recruiter is full of it.  :)  But, I don't blame you for your choice.  Best of luck, and wear something you love - you can wear it out to dinner on a future anniversary!
    Posted by squirrly[/QUOTE]

    He may actually be right.  H and I got married a little over a month before our PCS.  We were told it would be no problem for the move or anything.  We were told we would have 11,000 pounds for our move since we were married, but then the day of the move we were told that since the orders were cut when he was still single, everything for our move was processed as single, which meant only 7,000 pounds.  Luckily we weighed in at 6,600 since we waited to buy some big stuff here. 

    So it is crap, but it may be right.  Its funny, but the more I learn about the military life, the more it makes sense to me why so many young people rush into their marriages in the military.  They really make it impossible for you to do anything if not married. 
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  • Congrats to the sharer of my wedding day! You picked an AWESOME day! We can have our jitters together! : ) Not sure-why would you want to wear black? Is that normal for a wedding?Laughing
  • hcbrownehcbrowne member
    First Comment
    edited October 2010
    Thank you everyone, it was very nice:]

    The advice I've been given abt the military is to just go with the flow & to try & not sweat the small stuff. At the end of the day I'm married to the guy I wanted to spend my life with & we still get to share a special experience with family & friends.

    At this point we didn't think it was a good idea to test the recruiter as you can imagine, haha. Our chaplain who is military thought the same thing, Squirrly, but advised us to just kinda go with it just in case.

    but yaaaaaaaay. I'm married:D
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_im-getting-married-hr?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:b33952b1-4cc8-4bb8-b2c3-6087f45286eePost:e15e0b05-be6c-4192-ad36-994c065c5b5c">Re: So, I'm getting married in an hr...</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: So, I'm getting married in an hr... : He may actually be right.  H and I got married a little over a month before our PCS.  We were told it would be no problem for the move or anything.  We were told we would have 11,000 pounds for our move since we were married, but then the day of the move we were told that since the orders were cut when he was still single, everything for our move was processed as single, which meant only 7,000 pounds.  Luckily we weighed in at 6,600 since we waited to buy some big stuff here.  So it is crap, but it may be right.  Its funny, but the more I learn about the military life, the more it makes sense to me why so many young people rush into their marriages in the military.  They really make it impossible for you to do anything if not married. 
    Posted by dnbeach12[/QUOTE]

    Your H should have gotten his orders ammended.  We had a PCS move just after our wedding too, and H had ammended orders "waiting" for him.  Once we got my mil ID, they gave him the ammendment.  Took about 15 minutes.  I'm not saying the military is easy to deal with, but if you are proactive, it's not impossible either. 

    My opinion is that the military asks a lot of people, and can make your life together really, really complicated, just by the nature of the job, much less all the moving and such that goes with it.  Letting them otherwise control your life, like the recruiter saying they had to get married earlier, frustrates me, because it's the recruiter taking advantage of you so that his life is easier.  I get not wanting to rock the boat too much, but just keep it in mind going forward.  You've got a LONG time to deal with the military and its challenges.  I'd hate to see more lazy recruiters get in your way. 
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    Married: 2010
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    Mom to H: 2014

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    Dresses may be easier to take in than let out, but guest lists are not. -- kate51485
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