I just got a phone call from my futuer MIL. While i love her dearly, she has put me into a very awkward position and I am simply not comfortable here.
Before FI and I even became "engaged", we talked about who would be in our wedding party. As part of this, he told his parents that he wanted to ask his two little cousins (a boy and a girl) to be the ring bearer and flower girl respectively. I thought this was just about perfect. Well, when we were visiting his family back in October, he talked with his aunt about having the kids be in the wedding. She was enthusiastic about it. Since then, FI has deployed (he is Navy) and during the deployment, his mother and her sister (the aunt) had a fight and aren't really speaking to each other yet. Also, while he was gone my mother pressured me into asking my 3 cousins to be in the wedding as well. From their ages it made the most sense to ask the 2 oldest to be junior bridesmaids and the youngest to be a flowergirl with his cousin. This is fine...until the phone call this afternoon. My future MIL calls to tell me that she got a phone call from HER mother (FI's grandmother) who had gotten a phone call from her daughter (the aunt) that the aunt is worried that it is going to be too expensive and too much hassle (she does have health problems) to have the kids in the wedding party as opposed to simply attending the wedding. So MIL calls me asking me to email the aunt, whom I have never met nor even spoken to on the phone, that it is ok if she doesn't want the kids in the wedding.
While I have no problem with the kids not being the wedding, I understand the reasoning very well, I HATE that MIL is asking me to do this. No matter how I would word it, it would come across as me rescinding the offer to have them in the wedding. I refuse to do this. Am I wrong for refusing to do this? What should I do?