I created an AE for this because I feel like would be flamed for my opinion. I feel genuinely sorry for the brides who have been on here lately talking about how they aren't having the wedding they want because their parents are paying and controlling. I know, I know. No one needs to pay for their wedding but them, and money equals a say in things. But, how shiitty is it that you mother suddenly gets to play barbies because she offered you money. What a great way to start a marriage. "Sorry FI, I know you wanted to wear red, but parents say you have to wear blue because they're paying." To me it's like saying, "Here's a great new sweater for your birthday, friend. I only want you to wear it with dark wash jeans and black pumps. I'll never come to your birthday parties again if you break those rules."
This being said, it's completely reasonable for a parent to say you have to invite relatives X and Y because they gave you money or to ask that you use tulips in memory of your grandmother.
Sorry again for doing this under an AE. I just feel bad for those brides. This is why you should think twice about eloping because it's easier even if it's not REALLY what you want. Or accepting money so you can get married sooner. Do what is best for you!! You only get ONE chance at your wedding, no do-overs.