Wedding Etiquette Forum

Guest List trouble

What do you do when you want to invite a few people from work that you are friends with outside of work without offending other coworkers?

Also, I have cousins that I keep in touch with and cousins who live out of state that I haven't seen since I was 15.  Do I have to invite all of them? Word will spread if they're not all invited but I'm talking about 20 extra relatives that I hardly know.

Last question: Are you obligated to send a gift if you don't want to go to the wedding? Especially if it's to your cousin's wedding that you haven't seen in 15yrs? I would invite them out of guilt but hope  they don't come and I would NOT expect a gift.  But what if they think I invite them under the assumption they won't come and they think I only want a gift. What is the general rule of thumb on this ladies?

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