Here's the situation. My uncle is recently divorced, has 3 sons, and they are all invited to the wedding. My uncle is also dating a woman who has 2 daughters, none of which I've met, but the GF is invited to the wedding. They are all from out of state and plan to stay at her parent's timeshare about 2 hours away from the wedding venue. I don't know anything about these girls, but my mom thinks their ages are between 10 and 18. Therefore, they are probably too young to stay by themselves at the time share while everyone else comes to the wedding. The only kids invited to the wedding were cousins that I'm close with (a grand total of 4!) and my 3 nephews. So there won't be a ton of children hanging around either, and there are plenty of friends and other relatives whose children we did not invite because of budget limitations and not knowing the children. Which means having those 2 girls there that neither FI nor I are related to might cause resentment in other guests if they figure out why those kids are there when their own were not invited.
So what to do? I'm pretty sure my mom is going to tell them to bring the girls anyway. Everything is being held at a hotel. When we were talking, she said the girls could stay for the ceremony, go to the hotel room my mom and dad are renting during dinner, then come back down for dancing, which I said no, it's all or nothing. There's no reason if they are going to be there to have them go away for the meal. The budget is not such a huge issue that we can't afford 2 more girls... but then if everyone's kids were to suddenly show up, our guest list would have another 100 people on it.
Should I just extend the invitation to them anyway? I'm sure they'll be well behaved and all, but I don't know anything about them at all. I feel weird inviting my uncle's GF in the first place, but if he were still married, it would be his wife there. But to include the GF's kids is kind of weird to me. FI also is uncomfortable with inviting the girls, but with them being out of state, not having a babysitter, having to be dragged to the hotel anyway so their mom and her BF and his kids can go to a party they weren't invited to? Then there's the whole thing where they screw up my nice clean definition of which kids are invited and which aren't.
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