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Is a dinner at the reception a must?

readingqueen06readingqueen06 member
First Comment
in Wedding Etiquette Forum

My FMIL is insisting that my fiance and I need to have a lot of food at our wedding reception and we don't really have the budget to do it. We have quite a large guest list and there really isn't anyone we care to cut from it. The ceremony is at 2 and the reception is immediately after, in the same place as the ceremony. We had planned to have cake, punch and small things to snack on, but figured the guests would eat lunch before they came and be home in time for dinner. Should we still provide some sort of meal or would this be enough?

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Re: Is a dinner at the reception a must?

  • readingqueen06readingqueen06 member
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_dinner-reception-must?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:c5dd9fad-fae9-4cc4-b45c-7c9e2df73ef5Post:2d106aba-8216-4ae6-951d-3c4abd84569e">Re: Is a dinner at the reception a must?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Is a dinner at the reception a must? : Our ceremony is at 3pm and that is what we will be doing. our families are pretty big and our church family is big as well so cutting people wasn't something that we wanted to do.
    Posted by SarahElizabeth523[/QUOTE]

    That's exactly my problem. I have a rather large extended family and a large church family and would rather have them there than feed a large meal to a small gathering. And the guests all understand that and don't expect anything fancy.
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  • krimson19krimson19
    500 Comments
    punch, cake and light apps would work for a ceremony that early.  you can phrase in the invite that light refreshments will be served immediately following the ceremony.  that way folk know what to expect.  stick with your budget.  with $250 or less you canget everything you need from sam's club, including the cake.
    our wedding photos slideshow imagewedding video teaser Anniversary
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  • susanmhamiltonsusanmhamilton member
    Sixth Anniversary First Comment
    I love the idea of a non-dinner reception.  I don't want to start our married life with insurmountable debt...I'd rather have a nice down-payment on a home than a huge party that people will just criticize anyway.  I'd also rather have a beautiful engagement and wedding ring to look at every day for the rest of my life, than have a beautiful wedding dress to wear for one day.

    We have not made our wedding plans yet, as we haven't even set the date, but I love the idea of an afternoon cake and punch reception or a cocktail party with hors d'oeurves rather than a full dinner.

    It's your wedding, not your FMIL's.  Do what you want and what you can afford, and just nicely let her know that "this is what we've decided to do".  Don't ask her opinion, because she'll take that to mean that she gets a vote.  Go for it and enjoy your day!
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  • kathrynhabibtikathrynhabibti member
    Seventh Anniversary 500 Comments
    [QUOTE]That sounds lovely. Tell your FMIL to shove it (nicer than that of course).
    Posted by Manwaithiel[/QUOTE]
    "Shove it, please."
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  • Calypso1977Calypso1977 member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 25 Love Its First Answer
    could you do a morning wedding and offer a brunch or lunch? that would be cheaper than dinner for sure.
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  • readingqueen06readingqueen06 member
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_dinner-reception-must?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:c5dd9fad-fae9-4cc4-b45c-7c9e2df73ef5Post:d70089e2-c90a-4da2-9e15-82c9f5928868">Re: Is a dinner at the reception a must?</a>:
    [QUOTE]could you do a morning wedding and offer a brunch or lunch? that would be cheaper than dinner for sure.
    Posted by Calypso1977[/QUOTE]

    A morning wedding isn't really an option for us. We're doing good to get early afternoon. Otherwise, that would be a good idea.
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