KPS

waltzingmatilda13

And go!

waltzingmatilda13

I really don't understand the stripper girlfriend. From what I read, he's the H's girlfriend and the wife just puts up with her. The girl is basically letting him cheat and I don't get it. Please, KPS poster, don't let this continue. You deserve to be happy in a committed relationship. 

annakb8

There was a thread about this yesterday afternoon, but whatever. Things are slow. Let's talk about it again!

I also said this in the good morning thread: I feel sorry for the person who's H has genital warts. She needs to stop blaming herself.

baystateapple

(C & P from the morning thread)

The SIL one really hits me. 

My BIL is married to a very nice girl, but she was furious that H and I got engaged two months after they did, and married two months after they did.  I think she's over it now?  But I don't know.

I don't know if we'll ever be "friends".  I would like to get along with her, be friends with her, but we don't have a lot in common, and she doesn't make an effort to hang out with the rest of the family, except her H and my MIL.

[Deleted User]

Oh man. If H confessed to sleeping with a stripper at his b-party, there would be a divorce the next day. No effing way would she be our "girlfriend." WTF? I feel really sorry for that KPS person, both because her H is an ass and because she seems to feel like she can't say no.

I don't know what I'd do if H called me a different name. But I don't think I'd take it well. As for his sister, she's nice and all, but we will never be BFFs. We are way too different.

ahhhitsshannyn

We talked a little about this yesterday afternoon but I think most people were gone by then.

I am still confused by the name one. You are already merging families, why on Earth would it be rude to assume you would take his name if you chose to? I am just confused and hoping for someone to enlighten me.

The stripper GF is either MUD or just plain weird. Kick them both to the curb and be done with them.

I would turn into the hulk if H said some other girls name. Without a doubt.

laurenclaire1386

I'm pretty glad that H doesn't have any siblings. Makes dealing with in laws a lot simpler.

annakb8

I would be upset if FI called me his ex's name too. But mostly because I don't think they had a very good sex life and I think I'm more attractive than her. That might make me vain.

I would also think it was weird because he's not a name caller in general. Neither am I. I guess people really do this though?

waltzingmatilda13

I thought with things like warts you can have them a long time before you ever have symptoms. He could easily have been carrying the virus and just now had a flare up. There's no way to tell where it started. 

baystateapple

Ditto Seshat.  If I found out H cheated on me at his b-party, there wouldn't BE a wedding.  And if I found out after the wedding, immediate divorce.

And I'd be really, really upset if my H called me by his ex's name.

laurenclaire1386

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_kps-19?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c6a50aba-a977-417a-a145-47cd7c26e572Post:9f41e38d-83b9-47dc-b6da-3bb9d10f0846">Re: KPS</a>:
[QUOTE]I would be upset if FI called me his ex's name too. But mostly because I don't think they had a very good sex life and I think I'm more attractive than her. That might make me vain. I would also think it was weird because he's not a name caller in general. Neither am I.<strong> I guess people really do this though?</strong>
Posted by annakb8[/QUOTE]
Now that you mention it, neither H nor I are name callers. I can't recall ever actually saying his name during sex. Or him saying mine. Huh.

waltzingmatilda13

I'm on the divorce bandwagon, too. I'm sorry, but you don't cheat and get a second chance, much less a girlfriend. 

And I'd be so hurt if H called me by another name. So hurt. 

[Deleted User]

Also, if my H suddenly developed genital warts, I would probably automatically assume he cheated. If I didn't have any symptoms (and assuming I knew for sure I didn't have them), then why blame yourself first? I might be reading/understanding that one wrong, but I don't get why she is putting the blame on herself just because she had a 1-night stand in the past.

annakb8

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_kps-19?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c6a50aba-a977-417a-a145-47cd7c26e572Post:1380b24a-901f-4986-bf70-669ee5a6db01">Re: KPS</a>:
[QUOTE]I thought with things like warts you can have them a long time before you ever have symptoms. He could easily have been carrying the virus and just now had a flare up. There's no way to tell where it started. 
Posted by waltzingmatilda13[/QUOTE]

Yeah, I think this is true. Also, SOO many people have some type of HPV. Pretty much all of my girlfriends have had abnormal paps at one time or another. It's just something that happens, even when you take precations, it isn't something to be ashamed about.

waltzingmatilda13

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_kps-19?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c6a50aba-a977-417a-a145-47cd7c26e572Post:8f21f175-e2c7-4ead-af1b-836ba8e9b392">Re: KPS</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: KPS : Yeah, I think this is true. Also, SOO many people have some type of HPV. Pretty much all of my girlfriends have had abnormal paps at one time or another. It's just something that happens, even when you take precations, it isn't something to be ashamed about.
Posted by annakb8[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Absolutely. I've had an abnormal pap before years ago and nothing since. It just happens sometimes. 

</div>

Habs2Hart

If Fl cheated, there either wouldn't be a wedding, or there would be a divorce.  That is so not to be tolerated.  And now to have her in the relationship with them?  WTF?  I don't get it.  At. All.  He'll walk the hell over you now girl.  Get out now. 

missy68

Unfortunately, I'm the one who's called John by the ex's name. Just in conversation (my dad did too, after the wedding and several glasses of scotch). They are both J names, and John's cousin, his cousin's son, and HIS son are all named the same as my ex. So, it's a little "head turning" to hear it.

Plus, his sister, after her 2nd divorce, went back to her 1st married name so she and her son would have the same name. Her new husband took her name. And THEIR last name is the ex's last name.

They used to use that name for reservations, etc. I put my foot down about that one. Either use my maiden name, or spell ours.

waltzingmatilda13

The baby one: did they not ever discuss children before getting married? I would be devastated if I ever found out that H didn't wants kids after we were married. I think it's clear from the KPS that that submitter probably wants kids. You wouldn't be that upset about it if you didn't care. 

LDYGTR13

#1) I'm confused - what I'm gathering is that they think it's rude for the wife not to ask if it's okay to take their husband's last name?? Is that right?? I find that strange.

#2) I tooootally understand. When H and I were at Disney he was all "OMG KIDS SUCK!" when kids were crying etc. I know he wants them, but it's off putting to hear. *big hug*

#3) Woah. I have no idea what I'd do/feel in that situation. *hugs*

#4) That kitten is adorable - however, no human looks that cute with a broken leg. You'll be okay. We've all been to events we weren't thrilled about.

#5) I wanna know why your SIL doesn't want to be your friend? My SIL and I get along okay, but she's not my "friend" per se. I dont think I'd wanna be her buddy lol - probably because I'm not comfortable around drugs and she and her friends do a lot of them (sadly, I just realized this goes for BOTH of my sister in laws).

#6) I couldn't keep 20 accounts straight.

#7) I can't imagine how you feel. She's "your" girlfriend? Does your H know how you feel? Thats awkward...I'm sorry =(

#8) My ex called me his ex WIFE's name the first time I went down on him (oooh, I'm a hoebag...fellatio!!!) I cried and never did it again (and we dated for 3 years lol). I feel your pain.

That's just a C&P from yesterday's thread.

ahhhitsshannyn

My mom calls Matt Mark all.the.time.

There are no Marks that we know, but I love to tell Matt, fine I will just go to Marks, or I will have Mark do it for me. I am really mean.

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_kps-19?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:c6a50aba-a977-417a-a145-47cd7c26e572Post:4bd18862-e128-4f0f-b581-f36ae987d63d">Re: KPS</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: KPS : Me too. But it does remain dormant for so long, so I would have to take his word for it that he didn't cheat. And I know H wouldn't. Because he knows I would kill him if he did. :-P
Posted by cfaszews25[/QUOTE]

I guess I didn't realize it could stay dormant for so long. Like, H and I have been together for 5 years so if suddenly he had warts, yeah I'd be suspicious. But, he is like the world's worst liar so I'm pretty sure I'd know if he was lying about cheating on me.

annakb8

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_kps-19?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c6a50aba-a977-417a-a145-47cd7c26e572Post:05c17679-44a4-4959-a185-2f7dfeea65e8">Re: KPS</a>:
[QUOTE]The baby one: did they not ever discuss children before getting married? I would be devastated if I ever found out that H didn't wants kids after we were married. I think it's clear from the KPS that that submitter probably wants kids. You wouldn't be that upset about it if you didn't care. 
Posted by waltzingmatilda13[/QUOTE]

Ditto. This seems like one of the most obvious things to talk about before getting really serious with someone.

waltzingmatilda13

Same here, Cfas. We probably talked about kids after a month. We both knew we wanted them and he was ready to start trying almost immediately after the wedding. He had to wait for me to come around. 

Habs2Hart

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_kps-19?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:c6a50aba-a977-417a-a145-47cd7c26e572Post:8359551a-8aa7-4727-a563-ab7783967989">Re: KPS</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: KPS : H and I talked about kids probably 6 months into the relationship. We were already super serious by then, so it made sense. I would be upset now if he changed his mind. I've practically picked out names already, and we aren't even TTC yet.
Posted by cfaszews25[/QUOTE]

Ditto.  I couldn't imagine.  I know Fl wants to wait longer than I do, but he aint the one who's gotta birth them, so he can handle it a few years ealrier than he wants. 

A couple up here wed last year.  When they first started dating she said she'd never marry and never wanted to have kids.  Ever.  She is really young and when he broke up with her because he wanted to settle down and have a family, she changed her tune completely.  Told him she wanted to get married and have kids.  Well they got married, then she told my friend that "no way in hell do I ever want kids.  Don't tell H".  ummm...

LDYGTR13

My brother and H have the same name, so my parents call H "The Dweeb"...it's really awkward. He doesn't seem to mind, but I find it weird.

I really really really wish H would say my name more in general, not just "baby or honey or sugar" or whatever. Is that odd?

waltzingmatilda13

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_kps-19?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c6a50aba-a977-417a-a145-47cd7c26e572Post:2303ea1a-565c-4583-b4ed-cad4bbfc3089">Re: KPS</a>:
[QUOTE]My brother and H have the same name, so my parents call H "The Dweeb"...it's really awkward. He doesn't seem to mind, but I find it weird. I really really really wish H would say my name more in general, not just "baby or honey or sugar" or whatever. Is that odd?
Posted by LDYGTR13[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>We both call each other baby all the time. I was actually trying to remember yesterday when he said my name the last time and I couldn't think of anything recent. It doesn't bother me so much though. 

</div>

laurenclaire1386

LDY, I don't think it's odd. H pronounces my name in a way that irks me, so I'd actually rather a pet name most of the time.

annakb8

My Grandma always goes about 57 names before she can remember FI's name. And even then she might call him Robert or something when NO ONE ever calls him that, he is always Robbie. Sometimes she gives up and just calls him "my fella."

specialk84

FI and I are slowly coming down with baby fever.  We talked about it often throughout our relationship, and we always said we wouldn't have them.  He had a rough childhood and wants to be nothing like his mother, and I have some ongoing health problems that would get worse during or immediately after a preganancy.  

FI's cousin/best friend and his wife just had a baby at the end of March.  This sounds awful, but that kid is the only one I've ever really liked.  I bawled when he was born (I did not witness the delivery, but saw him within half an hour), and I had this super-protective feeling toward him.  

Now we're reconsidering it, but we want to move to a better neighborhood and have our job situations be more stable first.

I'm with Matilda.  Didn't they talk about it?

[Deleted User]

I told H when he called for our first date (it was a blind date) that I didn't want kids, so if that was something he wanted from a relationship then let's not even bother. He said, "Good to know, I was going to tell you the same thing." I would be the opposite of the KPS person, if he suddenly said he wanted one, I think I would cry.

waltzingmatilda13

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_kps-19?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c6a50aba-a977-417a-a145-47cd7c26e572Post:accb8c99-89a1-48f2-95b4-3385e879c413">Re: KPS</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: KPS : Ditto.  I couldn't imagine.  I know Fl wants to wait longer than I do, but he aint the one who's gotta birth them, so he can handle it a few years ealrier than he wants.  A couple up here wed last year.  When they first started dating she said she'd never marry and never wanted to have kids.  Ever.  She is really young and when he broke up with her because he wanted to settle down and have a family, she changed her tune completely. <strong> Told him she wanted to get married and have kids.  Well they got married, then she told my friend that "no way in hell do I ever want kids.  Don't tell H".  ummm...</strong>
Posted by Habs2Hart[/QUOTE]

<div><img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-surprised.gif" border="0" alt="Surprised" title="Surprised" /> That sounds like a recipe for divorce. </div>