uncle remarried

colourz

My uncle married his wife a few years ago. She has grown children. Would they be my cousins now? I am inviting my uncle's kids who have always been my cousins.  Would it be wrong not to include my aunt's kids?

PsyDet 2155

I probably would invite them.

ootmother2

Unless there are very hard feelings in the family, I would invite them

tenofcups4me

Have you met them? Do you know them? Unless they're considered part of your family now, no, I wouldn't invite them.

My uncle married a woman last year. She has kids in their 30s or 40s. I've met them once or twice at events through my cousins. I would never even consider inviting her children to anything I was doing. They're not my family and I don't know them. I'm sure she'd be shocked if I did invite them. (Note that I'm responding to the fact that you said they're grown children; if they were young kids and lived with her, my answer would be totally different.)

aMrsin09

Ditto what Ten said.
I inherited my adult step-brothers when I was 21.  I do not consider their kids to be my neices or nephews.

sarahlm619

Invite them!  Nothing like making new family memebers NOT feel welcome than by excluding them!  I'm a "step-cousin" (although have been since I was VERY young -- they were in their late teens at the time) and my cousins have NEVER made me feel like anything else than family...very warm and welcoming...and I can't tell you how much that means to me now that I'm a grown up

JerseyML

Have you talked to your parents about?  I am in a similar situation with my uncle and I am letting them decide if the kids should be invited.  By the time I get married one daughter will be 25, the son, who is handicapped, will be 23 and her youngest daughter will be 18.  I have seen the 16 year old daughter twice and have seen the 21 year old son a hand full times.  Never met the 23 year old daughter. 

Your parents will know best how to deal with the situation.  Leave it to them to decide.

garcias1

This is a tough situation.  It really depends on how close you are with them.  My stepdad married my mom when I was in HS.  He has two brothers and a sister, who all have their own kids.  I guess they would technically be my step-cousins, even though I don't consider them that.  My step-cousins are great people, but I've only seen them about a half dozen times since they have become my step-cousins (which is 10 years ago), and I don't talk to them on the phone or via email or anything else.  I am not inviting them to my wedding.  FI's family is HUGE and very close.  It would be hard to invite another whole additional extended family in addition to FI's family and mine so only the step-uncles and aunts are being invited.

Calypso1977

we had this exact situation.  my H had met the children of his uncle's 2nd wife once.  they were adults.  we didnt invite them. 

had we had a larger wedding, we probably would have, but we wanted a small wedding, adn we wanted people there that we knew adn were close to.  the 2 kids didnt fit into that criteria. 

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_uncle-remarried?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c6ad426c-2e12-4ea1-805c-9dd87f987bffPost:b682d90c-fd7a-4cb5-8d7d-6f8e8d931bc0">Re: uncle remarried</a>:
[QUOTE]Ditto what Ten said. I inherited my adult step-brothers when I was 21.  I do not consider their kids to be my neices or nephews.
Posted by aMrsin09[/QUOTE]

My dad's girlfriend has 2 kids, one of whom I've never met. Neither were invited to my wedding. My dad and his girlfriend did not appear to have a problem with that.

OP, if you know them and see them as much as your cousins, I'd do it. Otherwise, I wouldn't bother.