Wedding Etiquette Forum

Complicated Army Couple

I also posted this in the Military Brides section, but maybe someone could highlight the etiquette rules behind this situation:

Okay, so here's the deal.  My boyfriend and I are currently discussing getting married and there is an engagement ring on the horizon.  Here's where its complicated:
1)  I am enlisted, but I am in a program that will turn me into an officer when I finish the program in 2013.

2)  My boyfriend is also enlisted

3)  In order for us to legally stay together, we have to get married BEFORE I turn officer.  If we don't, both of us could end up with damaged careers.

4) In order for any of us to get a duty station together, and follow each other, we have to be married so we can enroll into the Army Married Couples Program (MACP).

5) If we wait too long to get married, we wont be in the army married couples program so we  wont be stationed together.  We are already apart NOW... and we would risk waiting an additional 3-5 years to be together if we waited because of military regulations. also highlight the fact that its illegal for an enlisted person to marry an officer.

Now that I got those sold facts out the way here is my dilemma.  Because of regulations and such, we MUST do a civil ceremony.  The program that I am in is academically rigorus and there is absolutely no time for me to arrange a wedding.  My boyfriend is currently a Drill Sergeant so he is just as busy as I am.  

I would prefer to have a formal  wedding with family and friends there supporting but it cannot be done, so by the look of things we will have to do a civil wedding... BUT... I Still want to have a real wedding after all the career-madness has died down.  But this would be 2 years later. 

How can I arrange a wedding without causing insult to the people that we invite because we are already married?  Just trying to think outside the box, why would anyone want to go to a wedding where people already know that we're married, or want to take part in a wedding shower, etc, etc...

Your input is greatly appreciated!
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