I understand that it's proper ettiquette to have the groom's sisters as bridesmaids. But.... my fiance has two sisters, one of which I have a great relationship with and I've asked to be a bridesmaid. The other sister is 8 years older than me (she's 32 & I'm 24); I have virtually no relationship with her, and she is a legitimate narcissist, with a borderline personality disorder. When we announced our engaged she literally threw an unrelated tantrum, just to get the attention back on her. All she's been talking about is that she "better be a bridesmaid" or her feelings will be hurt. Oh, and did I mention that she is extremely erratic and unpredictable?
Her daughter is going to be our flower girl and she is going to be involved in everything regardless. However, the thought of having her behind the scenes with me the day of the wedding makes me extremely uncomfortable... her past behavior has proved that she's not capable of being involved in anything without making it totally about her, and she's willing to go to great lengths to make that happen. The fact that she only cares about herself (whether or not she's be in wedding) is turning me off as well. This is the one day that I really just do not want to deal with her BS, and I think it's the one day that I'm allowed to request that. Does this situation count as an exception to the rule? Or should I just grin and bear it?