:)

lindseyrichards98

...

crfische

I don't think I'm getting it.

Do you like her?

pirategal03

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invite-this-woman-her-screaming-baby?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:cb2c62a4-c2a6-48cc-ba31-2a94f811f593Post:3c92f4a4-f8ef-46f4-9fd1-593b0b359e93">do I have to invite this woman and her screaming baby?</a>:
[QUOTE]My step-sister, I can't stand her. she is thirty, divorced, got knocked up last summer. tried to steal my fiance (before she got pregnant) while she was going out with some other guy. she talks behind my back to everyone. is a chronic liar...loves loves loves to lie about the littlest things, and I think she believes her own lies. plays innocent victim to daddy, loves to be the victim, according to her, her husband and babys father didn't leave her because she's unbarable they left because they were "selfish".... I can't stand this woman. On top of it all her baby is a screamer!!! that boy is never not crying. I know she wants to bring him to the wedding and I know if I say she needs to get a sitter she will slander my name to everyone i know and have our dad all upset and trying to convince me to let her bring him. <strong>do i stick to the no kids thing on this one</strong>? hopefully she'll refuse to come without him...lol jk
Posted by lindseyrichards98[/QUOTE]

if you're not inviting any kids, then it's reasonable not to invite hers.

[Deleted User]

I wouldn't invite anyone who tried to steal my FI to our wedding, family or not. But did she actually try to steal him or are you blowing something way out of proportion because you clearly hate everything about her?

As for the kid thing, if you aren't allowing any kids then thee's no reason to make an exception for hers.

twilight.rose

Ditto PPs. If you aren't allowing any children (breastfeeding infants aside), then it's reasonable not to invite this child. If, however, other children are invited, you can't exclude just one because you dislike his mother.

ohwhynot

Your wedding is in 8 months; your nephew probably won't be as much of a screamer by then (how old is he?  I am assuming he's a very young baby).  If you have a "no kids, period" rule, then you can apply it to every guest.  If you are allowing other guests to bring their kids, then you can't ask your stepsister not to bring her child. 

You could simply not invite her.  You know the fallout it will cause, but that's always an option.  You don't HAVE to have a relationship with someone just because he/she is in your family. 

pinkpinot

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invite-this-woman-her-screaming-baby?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:cb2c62a4-c2a6-48cc-ba31-2a94f811f593Post:f2639d37-4e3f-41c6-8d80-1d6ef5e971b7">Re: do I have to invite this woman and her screaming baby?</a>:
[QUOTE]yeeeaa thats onother thing...shes a very open breastfeeder. she likes to whip out her boob without any sign of modesty. hopefully by then she will have switched to formula
Posted by lindseyrichards98[/QUOTE]

You sound like a very sweet person.

xyrius

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invite-this-woman-her-screaming-baby?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:cb2c62a4-c2a6-48cc-ba31-2a94f811f593Post:3c9f02ed-0238-4cb5-a096-df2705d7ad45">Re: do I have to invite this woman and her screaming baby?</a>:
[QUOTE]I don't think I'm getting it. Do you like her?
Posted by crfische[/QUOTE]

lol

but seriously, why even invite her?  you obviously hate her, I don't think the baby (screaming or not) is the real issue here.

twilight.rose

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invite-this-woman-her-screaming-baby?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:cb2c62a4-c2a6-48cc-ba31-2a94f811f593Post:6072285f-f6fd-48f9-b5d3-16dc4011661c">Re: do I have to invite this woman and her screaming baby?</a>:
[QUOTE]ya, she definitely did try to steal him. he came home one day after seeing her at starbucks and was like, " your sister just tried to convince me to go out with her"
Posted by lindseyrichards98[/QUOTE]

Why is this relevant? If you really don't care about having a relationship with her (which it doesn't seem like you do), just don't invite her at all. This whole situation seems ridiculous.

kathrynhabibti

[QUOTE]My step-sister, I can't stand her. she is thirty, divorced, got knocked up last summer. tried to steal my fiance (before she got pregnant) while she was going out with some other guy. she talks behind my back to everyone. is a chronic liar...loves loves loves to lie about the littlest things, and I think she believes her own lies. plays innocent victim to daddy, loves to be the victim, according to her, her husband and babys father didn't leave her because she's unbarable they left because they were "selfish".... I can't stand this woman. On top of it all her baby is a screamer!!! <strong>that boy is never not crying.</strong> I know she wants to bring him to the wedding and I know if I say she needs to get a sitter she will slander my name to everyone i know and have our dad all upset and trying to convince me to let her bring him. <strong>do i stick to the no kids thing on this one?</strong> hopefully she'll refuse to come without him...lol jk
Posted by lindseyrichards98[/QUOTE]
Poor kid :^( How old is he? Part of what your dilemma depends on is if he's old enough to be fairly easily left at home with a sitter.

Depends on if you mean "no kids at all" or "just not her kid". If you're not inviting any kids, stick to your guns. it's a shame that she'll be all upset and get your dad worked up about it too, but they have to know that if you've asked people to leave their kids home, then she does as well. And if she talks badly about you it will only reflect on her, not on you.

But if you really don't want her there (which it sounds like), then don't invite her, family or not.

georgia_bride09

OP, bless your heart. You're a peach.  

andy71781

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invite-this-woman-her-screaming-baby?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:cb2c62a4-c2a6-48cc-ba31-2a94f811f593Post:8cc15a4b-41a1-4abf-9840-96223018463d">Re: do I have to invite this woman and her screaming baby?</a>:
[QUOTE]Your wedding is in 8 months; your nephew probably won't be as much of a screamer by then (how old is he?  I am assuming he's a very young baby).  If you have a "no kids, period" rule, then you can apply it to every guest.  If you are allowing other guests to bring their kids, then you can't ask your stepsister not to bring her child.  You could simply not invite her.  You know the fallout it will cause, but that's always an option.  You don't HAVE to have a relationship with someone just because he/she is in your family. 
Posted by ohwhynot[/QUOTE]

this.  think about the consequences and make your decision when you actually send your invites out.  You have six months to decide if you really hate her and her baby.

Beachy730

How old is the kid?  As PPs said 6 months in baby time is plenty of time for him to grow out of the crying phase, and also be onto formula.  Or hopefully she would have some class to excuse herself from the table to breastfeed.

I'm with PPs, that you don't have to invite her.  But if you know your dad will be upset by it, do you care if you upset him?  Also, if you are having a no-kids wedding, I would stick to that, unless she is breastfeeding at the time.  If you are having other kids, sorry you can't exclude hers only.

twilight.rose

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invite-this-woman-her-screaming-baby?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:cb2c62a4-c2a6-48cc-ba31-2a94f811f593Post:2bdb9469-6462-46e5-8a17-36cab7711683">Re: do I have to invite this woman and her screaming baby?</a>:
[QUOTE]you know I don't hate her baby...he is a baby. he did nothing wrong. he just screams a lot. and it's a matter of do I want to hear that piercing cry while I'm professing my love at the altar...not really. I think I will just say no kids to everyone there are only four babies in the family and i know my brother doesn't plan on bringing his. I would like not to invite her, but I will anyways out of respect for my step-father, who is helping me pay for my wedding and has acted as my father since I was 6. I truely can't get over my dislike for my step-sister right now but I suppose inviting at least her is the right thing to do
Posted by lindseyrichards98[/QUOTE]

For future reference, paragraphing and punctuation are your friends. It's rather difficult to get through your posts.

andy71781

Well ok then.  I think you've made a good decision to allow her to come but say no kids.  And she might not even come then anyway if she doesn't want to get a sitter.

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invite-this-woman-her-screaming-baby?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:cb2c62a4-c2a6-48cc-ba31-2a94f811f593Post:dca6847e-6ba7-4d18-a0fb-177b39cdbdb4">Re: do I have to invite this woman and her screaming baby?</a>:
[QUOTE] (unless she is breastfeeding, in which case he should be allowed to come).
Posted by cfaszews25[/QUOTE]
wrong.

i wouldn't invite her. with the knowledge that would mean there's no salvaging the relationship (i wouldn't want to with someone like that) and she'll "slander" you anyway.

Celles

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invite-this-woman-her-screaming-baby?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:cb2c62a4-c2a6-48cc-ba31-2a94f811f593Post:6609c051-b71c-4394-ad15-bc8da052334d">Re: do I have to invite this woman and her screaming baby?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: do I have to invite this woman and her screaming baby? : Why is this relevant? If you really don't care about having a relationship with her (which it doesn't seem like you do), just don't invite her at all. This whole situation seems ridiculous.
Posted by twilight.rose[/QUOTE]

I think it's relevant.  I might feel obligated to invite my step-sister out of respect for my step-father, even if I didn't care for her personally -- but there's no way in hell I'd invite someone who was actively attempting to entice my fiance into an affair. 

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invite-this-woman-her-screaming-baby?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:cb2c62a4-c2a6-48cc-ba31-2a94f811f593Post:7ac87c14-e5f3-44c9-a419-1cc98bb7df21">Re: do I have to invite this woman and her screaming baby?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: do I have to invite this woman and her screaming baby? : I think it's relevant.  I might feel obligated to invite my step-sister out of respect for my step-father, even if I didn't care for her personally -- but there's no way in hell I'd invite someone who was actively attempting to entice my fiance into an affair. 
Posted by Celles[/QUOTE]
agreed.

missy68

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invite-this-woman-her-screaming-baby?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:cb2c62a4-c2a6-48cc-ba31-2a94f811f593Post:3c9f02ed-0238-4cb5-a096-df2705d7ad45">Re: do I have to invite this woman and her screaming baby?</a>:
[QUOTE]I don't think I'm getting it. Do you like her?
Posted by crfische[/QUOTE]

Fish, she's thirty AND divorced - what do you think?? That's a double whammy.

pizzanfries4me

It sounds like this woman is a nutter and shouldn't be at your wedding, screaming baby or not. This is your day, you do as you want.

Belle2Be

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invite-this-woman-her-screaming-baby?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:cb2c62a4-c2a6-48cc-ba31-2a94f811f593Post:92797781-24eb-4487-9b18-40528897a62e">Re: do I have to invite this woman and her screaming baby?</a>:
[QUOTE]OP, bless your heart. You're a peach.  
Posted by georgia_bride09[/QUOTE]
*nods head in agreement*

amandaswisher1

I had a sort of similar situation. I don't have a problem with my step brother (who's only been my step brother since May) but I don't like his wife or her kids at all. She has 6 kids by 4 men and they are all undisciplined, obnoxious and rude. They were the main reason I made my wedding no kids, on top of the fact I'd have to pay full price per head to feed the brats. I did invite him and his wife because I wanted to respect my step father. They won't be coming though since they stopped talking to my step dad months ago and didn't even come when he married my mom.

Hope your situation turns out as well as mine did

JennaV26

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invite-this-woman-her-screaming-baby?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:cb2c62a4-c2a6-48cc-ba31-2a94f811f593Post:8cc15a4b-41a1-4abf-9840-96223018463d">Re: do I have to invite this woman and her screaming baby?</a>:
[QUOTE]Your wedding is in 8 months; your nephew probably won't be as much of a screamer by then (how old is he?  I am assuming he's a very young baby). 
Posted by ohwhynot[/QUOTE]

My sister had an AO wedding but my cousin brought her kid anyway and the thing screamed through the whole wedding. I bet the girl was 1.5 years when it happened.

If you have a no kid rule, stick to it! I swear that was my biggest obstacle in the planning of my wedding but it was worth it when I had 30 minutes of peace to marry my DH.

amjung2103

Ok i really dont want to be attacked as a rude/inconsiderate person, becasue i am just curious, i dont mind either way if kids are invited breast feeding or not, i just want to know some logic behind this --

why is a breastfeeding baby the exception to the no kids rule?  I know plenty of mothers whom have pumped and therefore have an ample supply of breast milk for their breast feeding child -- so is it really the "feeding" aspect - or is it jsut becasue they are so young and the mothers would probably feel more comfortable bringing their child then leaving with a babysitter or family for the evening? 

I didnt think we would have a no kids wedding, but since most of our family and friends are taveling about 5 hours - many have said they are leaving their kids with other family and having an adult weekend. so while we didnt say "NO KIDS" our guest have done that themselves mostly

Angrytomato

I wouldn't invite her. The fact that she tried to get your FI to cheat on you is grounds enough, and you obviously don't get along with her.

Tell your step-father you love him very much, but that you have personal reasons for not wanting to invite her. You don't have to go into detail. Don't whine to him about her! Remember, she's his daughter too.