Wedding Etiquette Forum

Help! My Maid of Honor is uncooperative- and she's my sister!

My two-years younger sister is my Maid of Honor. So here's the situation.

I gave her and the four other girls in my wedding party a choice of two different colors (gold or blue), out of two different fabrics (Satin or taffeta) in styles of bridesmaid dresses on a certain website (because I want the colors to match). Basically they all have to decide on the same color and fabric in the end by themselves. All the other girls are fine with the idea, and each have found several dresses they like.

My sister is a different story. So far she has gone so far as to insult me, telling me I have terrible taste and that (out of 300+ dresses) she hates every single one. She asked me something to the effect of "well, would YOU wear any of them?" She is obsessed with the idea that she will not look good enough at my wedding. 

She picked a dress (not in either of the fabric choices) with tulle and artificial flower petals all over it, and when I told her that it wouldn't fit in well, she got angry and began to resent every aspect of planning that I reveal to her. She is making herself a martyr, telling me and others that "her job is to obey me," and she turns up her nose at every suggestion I make for a dress.

I just want some ideas on how to communicate kindly to her while still helping her to understand that it's really about my fiance and I, not her? I need her support!
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