Help me with this sticky DJ mess

sarah0725

So, I did a dumb thing. I asked a friend about being a vendor, and now I don't know what to do.

FI and I know this guy from college. We both really like him a lot, and he and FI used to protest together, so they've had each other's back a lot and we are all in agreement politically. Our friend has been getting into the DJ business in the past few years, and we thought he'd be a good fit for our somewhat unconventional wedding, so we talked to him about it all, and he said he needed to think about it, and then he emailed FI a quote for his services that was at least $300 more than I expected he would say.

His quote is high because he lives in North Jersey and our wedding is in the south, so he'd need to travel with his equipment and maybe stay overnight, all things that we could help him with (we have large cars and beach houses). I was just looking at DJ prices, and we could definitely get a DJ from a service for a couple hundred dollars cheaper than our friend's quote.

So do we haggle? What is the etiquette here when the person is a friend? Is it crummy to haggle with a friend over a few hundred bucks when we're spending so much money on other parts of the wedding? What would you do?

JenGin74

I don't see the harm in haggling, friend or not. I can see where it would be a little uncomfortable because he's your friend, but as a professional he shouldn't get offended or anything

Celles

I'd hire a local DJ and invite him as a guest.  It doesn't sound like he was all that excited about it anyway (since he had to think about it), so it may be in everyone's best interests to say "thanks, but no thanks."

sarah0725

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_this-sticky-dj-mess?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:d25c4264-9036-4302-bf5f-a839e7d71533Post:3a6b2a54-4c65-4fdd-9e04-1ca569a14fe9">Re: Help me with this sticky DJ mess</a>:
[QUOTE]I'd hire a local DJ and invite him as a guest.  It doesn't sound like he was all that excited about it anyway (since he had to think about it), so it may be in everyone's best interests to say "thanks, but no thanks."
Posted by Celles[/QUOTE]

I think when he said he had to think about it, he meant that he wanted to think about the price he would quote us. He sent it like a day later.

The embarassing thing is that this all happened a few months ago, and we haven't talked to him much since then other than occasional FB comments. I kind of dropped the ball between my Ph.D. exams and being away all summer.

Honestly, you guys are making me think that he would probably react pretty well. When we talked to him, he was pretty clear that he wanted to make sure we handled it all professionally and had a contract and everything, because mixing business and friendship can be tricky. So maybe I'm getting too emotional about this, and I should be thinking about it more as a business arrangement.

Beachy730

Personally I would go with a local company.  I would say something to him like "this was a difficult decision for us but we chose to go with a local DJ so that you wouldn't have to travel with all of your equipment, and so you could also just enjoy our wedding as a guest."

sister2groom

I would tend not to haggle, or at least, sound like you don't expect him to come down for you. Something like "sorry, when we last talked I didn't really know much about how much things cost, I don't think we can afford that, we're going to have to go with something more local" and then if he REALLy wants to be a DJ in his friend's wedding he can lower his price, but no pressure.

squirrly

I'd just go with something local.  If he asks, let him know the price was out of your budget and you didn't want to make him feel like he had to compromise himself or his prices. 

cmmosley81

Well I have a few friends who are DJ's and I had to really look into their work and prices to see which one I would hire. I simply stated that I am looking into a DJ and I need to know what you would charge me for this. One of my friends gave me a steal of a deal that I couldn't say no. When we talked about it with him he stated that he also travels with an assistant. So that does bring his price up a little. I would ask him about that if he has an assistant and if that is what brought his price up.  

jcamm11

I say don't mention anything about the price, but tell him that on second thought, you'd he be able to let loose and have fun at your wedding that work.

Goldlie11

$900 is really good for NJ.  Most DJs I've spoke with from NJ charge $1,500+.  So, I think he did try and give you a deal.  Honestly, it doesn't seem to make sense to have him bring all of his equipment long distance and everything when It will cost you more.  Tell him you found someone local and that you'd rather him be a guest at the wedding.  He might decline since he's OOT and not that close to you and your FI.  Even if he does decide to attend, you're still saving money.