Invitation wording pertaining to children?

lbow1984

Okay so here goes.  There's probably not a way to word my invitations to convey what I'm trying to say here, but I just thought I would check.

 We're inviting quite a few people to our wedding who have children.  I don't mind having a few children at the wedding.  That being said I would prefer that we not end up with half of our wedding guests being children (I realize this could happen and since we're not doing a no children wedding if it does I'll deal with it, but here is my question:

Is there a way to word invitations, not to imply no children, but also not to imply all of the children are invited.  I think I'm just to new at this and if this sounds dumb I apologize.

All I can think of when the invite goes out is that it would go out to Mr and Mrs so and so and family or just Mr and Mrs so and so.  I'm assuming one that just says r and Mrs so and so is implying only the adults and that the one that says ...and family implies the adults and their children.

So does anyone have a better suggestion on how to word the invitations or do I just suck it up and say and family and whoever includes their children includes them?  (We have made sure there is room in the budget in case every single person does bring their kids so we're okay there, but it would be great if not every single person did and we could have perhaps more for the cocktail hour or more choices at the bar)

emilyinchile

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invitation-wording-pertaning-children?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:d4a5d257-a6b6-44eb-a61b-7d21c2738962Post:105213fe-556e-44e9-8aa7-6087c1664a3e">Invitation wording pertaning to children?</a>:
[QUOTE]Okay so here goes.  There's probably not a way to word my invitations to convey what I'm trying to say here, but I just thought I would check.  We're inviting quite a few people to our wedding who have children.  I don't mind having a few children at the wedding.  That being said I would prefer that we not end up with half of our wedding guests being children (I realize this could happen and since we're not doing a no children wedding if it does I'll deal with it, but here is my question: Is there a way to word invitations, not to imply no children, but also not to imply all of the children are invited.  I think I'm just to new at this and if this sounds dumb I apologize. <strong>All I can think of when the invite goes out is that it would go out to Mr and Mrs so and so and family or just Mr and Mrs so and so.  I'm assuming one that just says r and Mrs so and so is implying only the adults and that the one that says ...and family implies the adults and their children. </strong>So does anyone have a better suggestion on how to word the invitations or do I just suck it up and say and family and whoever includes their children includes them?  (We have made sure there is room in the budget in case every single person does bring their kids so we're okay there, but it would be great if not every single person did and we could have perhaps more for the cocktail hour or more choices at the bar)
Posted by lbow1984[/QUOTE]

Do that, but instead of putting "and family" actually write Mr. and Mrs. Smith on one line and Jenny Smith on the second line.

You don't address the issue of who is or is not invited on the invitation itself, just on the envelope. If people RSVP for additional, uninvited guests you deal with it on a case-by-case basis.

redheadfsu

You have to choose who to invite.

If you are just inviting the parents, just put their names on the invite. If you are inviting kids, you have to put the child's name on the invite too. If you do not put the child's name on the invite, then you are not inviting the kids.

Do not put "& family" (they could bring 10 extra people who you barely know who are kind of their family)

SirJuliusVonHaast

It kind of sounds like you are planning to reward whoever is rude enough to RSVP for extra people. If I got an invitation addressed only to Mr. and Mrs. So and So, I would assume my children weren't invited and RSVP as such. I might be miffed if I got to the wedding and saw that a bunch of other children were there (because I would assume those children had been invited while mine hadn't).

You should decide which children you want to invite (for example, children of family and the bridal party, but not friends children . . .or only children for out of town guests) and invite those families with the children listed on the invitation. If you don't want to invite everyone with children, draw a line somewhere (i.e. family children only).