Names....

obxbride17

This may be a really stupid question, but should the bride and groom's formal given names be used on STDs, invitations, programs, etc or should the names that they go by be used? For instance, my given name is Katherine, but I go by Katie. Should I use Katherine on everything or Katie? It feels so strange to use a name that you don't really associate yourself with for such an intimate affair, doesn't it? 

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

I think it kind of depends on the formality of your wedding. Also, STDs are inherintly less formal than invites.

FI and I got by our given names, but FI has two middle names. He NEVER uses the second middle name, but we put it on our invitations because it is technically his full, legal name.

Celles

FI goes by Jef instead of Jeffrey.  (He and his friends have a weird three-letter policy when it comes to nicknames.)   We used "Jef" on our STDs, since they're cute and informal, but we'll use Jeffrey on the actual invitations. 

It's a formal occasion, so I'd use formal names.  

Calypso1977

id go with "katie" on the STD's and any other wedding items like monogrammed menus, etc.  the invitations shoudl have your full, formal name.

AllAboutTheBenjamin

I'm on the fence about this. 

I call my fiance Ben on here - but no one calls him that.  Everyone calls him BJ.  I think half his friends don't even know his full name.

We're doing his full name on our invitations but on our toasting flutes, we're having BJ engraved.  During the wedding I think our pastor will refer to him as BJ.  The entrance sign to our reception will say "Danielle and BJ." 

It just depends on what you're comfortable with and how formal you really want to go.  Our wedding is going to be fairly formal but not SO formal that people will be calling BJ "Benjamin" all day long or anything.

aimers1525

ditto to @msmery...FI goes by the first two letters of his first name and middle name (exp.: J.M.)  but we are using his complete full name and middle name (exp: Joseph Michael) for our invites, and during the Catholic wedding ceremony.  For the save the dates and our website, etc. we're using his nickname.

KentuckyKate

I have the same name, and I used Katie on my STDs and TY notes and Katherine on my invitations.

In my ceremony, I told the priest to use Katherine Elizabeth Lastname at the very beginning during the Declaration of Consent, and then refer to me as Katie for the rest of the time, including the vows.

Doing it this way felt right to me, because I had it  either formal or intimate in the situations I think called for it, but I think you should do what feels right for you.

blondie82784

STDs we used our nick name and for our Invites we used our names from birth because its a formal invite

jenellsrevenge

We went as formal as I could him to agree to. His name is Paul, but he generally goes by Paulie. He wanted that on the invite, but I said no, so we agreed to use just Paul and no middle because he doesn't like his middle name.

Floridabride2010

hey beachybride--I used my "slang" name --no one would know who Cassandra was.  Oh and I sent you a private message.