Wedding Etiquette Forum

Help about Wedding Checks and who they are made out to......

Hello my name is Gena and my finance and I have a major problem. It is inevitable that we will get some checks made out to Mr & Mrs_______ or just to him. The problem is my finance doesn't have a bank account what so ever (works off of cash only). Also my name won't be changed for a couple of weeks. My question is how do we get the checks cashed or deposited with minimal hassle? I don't want to have to call someone after the fact and say Oh btw can you please rewrite the check in brides name only. Is there anyway to politely let it be known? Can we post something on our web site? I honestly don't know what to do... Please help.
Thank you,
Gena

Re: Help about Wedding Checks and who they are made out to......

  • I'm pretty sure you can still get checks cashed at most banks with proper id even if you don't have an account there.
  • tlc35tlc35 member
    500 Comments Second Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    You could do as above or you could add him to your account or he could open an account.
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  • steignsteign member
    Fourth Anniversary 500 Comments
    edited March 2013
    Your FI will just need to be present to sign in front of the teller & show ID when you cash the check, I believe. As long as you have an account your bank should honor it because they will have recourse on you if anything happens.

     I was a teller before I graduated college and I remember my manager would allow you to deposit/cash the checks written out in your married name (ETA) as long as you brought in your marriage license. However, call your bank and find out their policies JIC.

    ETA: see above
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  • Each bank has its own policies, so you will need to speak to your branch to see what the protocol is.

    For us, we both had to sign the check (and I signed my legal name, even if it didn't match the name on the check) and then because we both had our names on the account, only one of us had to be present to actually deposit it. We did not have to present our certificate of marriage. 
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  • Most banks will allow you to cash a check if it is drawn from that bank even if you don't have an account. Definately will need ID to do so. He can sign the check over to you for you to deposit. I've done that when I would get a paper check from work and would have to pay my roommate rent.
    You never lose by loving. You always lose by holding back. - Barbara DeAngelis
  • AddieCakeAddieCake member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    edited March 2013
    I just took our marriage license with me to the bank to deposit anything made out to Mr. and Mrs. No problems. 
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • You really can't tell people how to make out their checks.  But you can endorse the check with whatever name is written as the payee and then under that endorse it in your current legal name.  The bank should deposit it as long as you have proper ID in your current legal name.
  • We opened an account together as our wedding account. We each have our own accounts but then we have a joint account that we are both on so we can deposit checks made out to either one of us. 
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  • Why doesn't your fiance just open a checking account? You can deposit cash.
  • edited March 2013
    I work in the banking industry, and here is how you properly sign over your checks to someone else:

    Say if the check is made out to your FI:   Mr. John Doe.

    Your Fiance signs the back with his normal signature  Then under his signature, he writes:  Pay to the order of (Your Name)

    You then sign under your name that he has written on the back.

    Many banks will require both of you to show up together, even when the back is written this way.  Bring your picture IDs and make a day of it.

    Example of how it would look:

    John Doe
    Pay to the order of GI Jane
    GI Jane
    Don't make me mobilize OffensiveKitten

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  • I really think you should consult with a lawyer about this before getting married.  Community property can do interesting things to "your" money and "his" debts.
  • Why did you delete your second post OP? That info was important for how other people answer your question.
  • PPs have good advice for the proper way to do this.  

    When we got married, we endorsed the backs of all of the checks, and then my mom actually deposited them in our bank account for us while we were on our honeymoon.  She had no problems doing this, but that may be because they know her and me at our local bank, so the rules might be a little more relaxed.  Point being, if you are depositing the checks at a bank you frequently use, they may not be super strict about needing a marriage license or your ID matching your new married name.
  • we opted to take all the checks we got to teh banks on which they were drawn to cash them, and they were made out all sorts of ways.  i recommend doing this for two reasons.  1., putting cash into your accoutn rather than checks allows for the money to be immediately available to you with no holds.  2.  if the check is bad, you will find out abotu it without incurring fees (yes, sometimes people do write bad checks for wedding gifts, not out of malicious intent, but because they simply dont know how to balance their checkbook properly).

    the major banks didnt hassle us, but the stupid local bank did.  then after stupid local bank hassled us, they actually asked if we wanted to open an account with them.  Uh, that would  be a big fat no. 

    in our case i didnt change my name ever, so even if we'd had a marriage license it wouldt have helped if they had been adamant that i had to have the name on the check.  some places had me sign my legal name, some had me sign as it was written on the check.  some didnt even ask.
  • I am super curious what the mysterious deleted post said.  I'm imagining, like, mob connections or serious tax evasion that the guy's afraid to have his name entered into a bank system.  Otherwise why not just join OP's account? it's not like your money HAS to be deposited into an account just because you have one...
  • edited March 2013

    It depends on your bank and the rules of your state. I sometimes get checks made out to my "real" name but I always have to have my birth certificate with me, as that is the only document with my "real" name on it.

    of course my mom insisted I have my "real" name (which I LOATHE) on my wedding invites, which means checks will be made out to that name. Le sigh.

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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_help-about-wedding-checks-and-who-they-are-made-out-to?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:dba90920-f410-44b1-a669-79556d1b768cPost:5b010649-d188-467e-8e60-5a0fa1649c67">Re: Help about Wedding Checks and who they are made out to......</a>:
    [QUOTE]I am super curious what the mysterious deleted post said.  I'm imagining, like, mob connections or serious tax evasion that the guy's afraid to have his name entered into a bank system.  Otherwise why not just join OP's account? it's not like your money HAS to be deposited into an account just because you have one...
    Posted by Kate61487[/QUOTE]

    <div>He is in arrears for child support, and if he opens a bank account the courts can garnish it.  It makes me wonder what he does for a living, because they should be able to garnish his wages too.</div><div>
    </div><div>I agree OP - you need to consult a lawyer about what marriage will do to YOUR assets in your state.  Rules on this vary a lot, and you need to know what you're getting yourself into by marrying him before the child support is paid off.  It may not affect you at all, but it may allow courts to reach your assets as well.</div>
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  • sounds super sketchy to me.

  • IDK what happened to it. I posted it from my phone and when I went back to check it was gone.
    Gena

    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_help-about-wedding-checks-and-who-they-are-made-out-to?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:dba90920-f410-44b1-a669-79556d1b768cPost:50be86eb-b381-447b-a938-dfbd58e9ee93">Re: Help about Wedding Checks and who they are made out to......</a>:
    [QUOTE]I really think you should consult with a lawyer about this before getting married.  Community property can do interesting things to "your" money and "his" debts.
    Posted by STARMOON44[/QUOTE]
  • As far as the back child support goes it is a considerable amount and being that my FI didn't graduate high school he hasn't ever been able to catch up (he is back in school and working on making a better life for himself and our family, including his son). the IRS already takes any return he would get & will take mine once we are married. His wages are garnished plus he has employer take extra out every month to try to pay the arrears off sooner.  He is not dodging his Child support just can not pay it all and still have money to live off of. He is doing what he can to pay it off as quickly as possible, which is why he pays more than what is court ordered.  Even though he is current on all payments from the time child was 6-18 and is still paying for the arrears owed, the back child support has a 10% cumulative interest to it every year which means over half of what he owes is interest. During the time his son was young, yes he was working under the table, living with the child's mother & paying all the bills while she was still collecting Child support. He has NO intentions of skipping out on these payments and is continuing to pay and most likely will until he's dead. Sadly even with doing all he does the state will levy any account with his name on it and wipe it clean. In our state you only have to be one month late before they are allowed to levy your accounts. therefore if we were to open an account to deposit wedding checks the state would take them  which is why I asked my original question. We have talked to an attorney and done countless hours of research on the internet. We are also working with a financial counselor to see how we can go about getting the areas paid off faster.
    Anyway thank you all for your help.
    Gena

    As far as the original post that was deleted, I don't know what happened there. I had posted it from my phone and then when  went back to check the thread it was gone. And I'm sorry I have not been able to get back on until now.
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