Follow up to the rude cousin email

DanielleD7782

Just to keep the fun going...I used Quote Queens response and I got another book back from her. I chose not to respond to this one...

Thanks for writing me back.
I'm sure you're a busy lady
Sorry, the pile of mail we get once a week, makes the envelopes the first thing in the trash. So, i have no idea what was written on the front. Plenty of christmas cards don't have the boys names on them explicitly, thats just too much for anyone to write, so that wouldn't have phased me.
The rest of your invite packet amazingly got a magnet on the fridge. (I normally forget & lay them somewhere)
So when I went thru the it again last nite, I would have expected to see somewhere:
*Adults only please, or *No children please.
Not *No kids, that's obviously rude.
...After Judy was the one to say this new info in conversation, assuming I already knew. (Just simply was asking if I had sent our RSVP yet)
-Not poor ediquette to me, just saves a lot of embarrassment & disappointment for the friends & family showing up with children to this wedding, that haven't 'heard thru the grapevine'.
Look, I am not trying to start anything- absolutely not.
You're going to do what you dreamed & that's really great. Just would expect to hear that important info on the invite-

Absolutely not seeking a sympathy invite, its totally fine- you guys have fun & enjoy
Last nite I was simply writing you, I guess to see if this was true.
We'll just see all the family & clint another time.
Sorry to have bothered you.
Im 38 & Weddings & funerals still keep you guessing...

Don't think a thing about it & hope it's great
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My favorite comment has to be about comparing a wedding invite to a Christmas card.  This has turned into a whole discussion with the entire family. My mom made a good point to her sister by saying...this email was out of line and all she had to do was send the d*mn rsvp card back with a "declines with regret"

mwhitson14

Whew goodness. People irritate the shiit out of me.

God forbid she just deal with the no kids and move on.

amysmomma

In your shoes I'd be ecstatic she won't be showing up.  She sounds like a loonie.

Belle2Be

I must've missed the otheremails, what is wrong with that one?

andy71781

what a dumb b.  I'm sure she'd be annoying and not worth the cost of her dinner. 

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

What an idiot. Other people won't show up with their kids because I presume they know the etiquette of addressing a wedding invitation.

quotequeen

Sorry.  Maybe next Christmas you should give her an etiquette book. 

Mrs.B6302007

Darn.  QQ beat me to it.  I was going to say send her a Christmas card with everyone's name on the envelope and an E book.

quotequeen

This is my favorite part:

*Adults only please, or *No children please.
Not *No kids, that's obviously rude.

Riiiiiiiiight.

mrscheetah

I say, address the envelope on this year's christmas card to "Stupid Bitch" and if she gets mad, you can be like, oh you said all the envelopes went in the trash!

Belle2Be

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_follow-up-rude-cousin-email?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:e1f0e3d0-f3ac-4351-bf2f-0298f158b39bPost:70b13c87-f598-42c6-b497-a8d6c9749dca">Follow up to the rude cousin email</a>:
[QUOTE]Just to keep the fun going...I used Quote Queens response and I got another book back from her. I chose not to respond to this one... Thanks for writing me back. I'm sure you're a busy lady :) Sorry, the pile of mail we get once a week, makes the envelopes the first thing in the trash. So, i have no idea what was written on the front. Plenty of christmas cards don't have the boys names on them explicitly, thats just too much for anyone to write, so that wouldn't have phased me. The rest of your invite packet amazingly got a magnet on the fridge. (I normally forget & lay them somewhere) So when I went thru the it again last nite, I would have expected to see somewhere: *Adults only please, or *No children please. Not *No kids, that's obviously rude. ...After Judy was the one to say this new info in conversation, assuming I already knew. (Just simply was asking if I had sent our RSVP yet) -Not poor ediquette to me, just saves a lot of embarrassment & disappointment for the friends & family showing up with children to this wedding, that haven't 'heard thru the grapevine'. Look, I am not trying to start anything- absolutely not. You're going to do what you dreamed & that's really great. Just would expect to hear that important info on the invite- Absolutely not seeking a sympathy invite, its totally fine- you guys have fun & enjoy :) Last nite I was simply writing you, I guess to see if this was true. We'll just see all the family & clint another time. Sorry to have bothered you. Im 38 & Weddings & funerals still keep you guessing... Don't think a thing about it & hope it's great :) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- My favorite comment has to be about comparing a wedding invite to a Christmas card.  This has turned into a whole discussion with the entire family. My mom made a good point to her sister by saying...this email was out of line and all she had to do was send the d*mn rsvp card back with a "declines with regret"
Posted by DanielleD7782[/QUOTE]


Curious, what is wrong with comparing Christmas envelopes to Wedding envelopes? I take it you assumed that since you put just the two of their names on the invite that that was to imply no children?
Someone fill me in!

mwhitson14

Because a Christmas card isn't an invitation to an event. They're not even the same thing.

Meagan78

She should have just let it drop.  Still rude.  She should never have called you on it.

banana468

So your mom did mention it to her sister?

I'm wondering what auntie thinks of her DIL now.

DanielleD7782

Months ago before the invites even went out my aunt asked my mom if kids were invited. My aunt is the one that had the problem to begin with. My aunt claimed she wouldn't come to the wedding if her grandkids weren't invited. My mom told her not to come then. My aunt is coming and does agree that the emails from her DIL were out of line, but they are staying "well thats just Stephani being her usual busy body self". 

Turns out I'm the bad guy for not wanting tons of kids at my expensive wedding.

JanoBean75

She still sounds like a tool.

Sheesh, she does need an etiquette book. Send one and address it to her AND her kids. God knows they'll need it! Putting anything on the invitation about who's not invited is rude. Her suggestions made me snort. 19 years doing wedding hair, indeed. I love how she thinks you're unique in not wanting Jacki, Sammi, Tiffani, Billi, and other kids with names ending in "i" at your wedding.

Her Christmas card envelope analogy is just stupid. NOT THE SAME THING.

squirrly

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_follow-up-rude-cousin-email?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:e1f0e3d0-f3ac-4351-bf2f-0298f158b39bPost:50c2b428-47e3-4870-8fe3-b798abf453ef">Re: Follow up to the rude cousin email</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Follow up to the rude cousin email : Curious, what is wrong with comparing Christmas envelopes to Wedding envelopes? I take it you assumed that since you put just the two of their names on the invite that that was to imply no children? Someone fill me in!
Posted by Belle2Be[/QUOTE]

Christmas cards =/= wedding invitations.

The names on the envelope DO convey who is invited, with no exceptions.  That is proper etiquette.  She wasn't just "hoping" somebody would figure it out - she did EXACTLY what she was supposed to do. 

The SIL who wrote the email above wrote her one the other day complaining about how she had to find out secondhand that her kids weren't invited since the OP didn't put "No Children" on her invites.