Wedding Etiquette Forum

Hair Issue HELP!

I have 4 bridesmaids, two of which are out of towners, two live in the same town as I do. When I made my hair appointment, I made appointments for my two out-of-town bridesmaids at the same place I'll be going (I've been seeing the same stylist for about 3 years!) I also made appts for my flower girl and jr. bridesmaid who also live out of town... However my two in-town bridesmaids asked if it was ok for their own stylists to do their hair, since they're the most comfortable with them. I said fine since I'm not having them all have their hair the same way. (They all have different dresses too).

But now I have a dillema... Am I supposed to pay for my bridesmaids to get their hair done? If so, how do I pay for my other bridesmaids when they won't be with me? Or is it ok to just pay for the out-of-towners since they're already making the trip up here? I don't want to treat them differently just because they don't live where I'm getting married... OR can I just pay for my child attendants and have my bridesmaids pay for themselves?? I'm at a loss! Any advice would be appreciated!

Re: Hair Issue HELP!

  • Meaghann17Meaghann17 member
    100 Comments
    edited April 2011
    You should pay for them if you are requiring them to have their hair done, ie. you want them to wear it a certain way or you feel they have to have it professionally done.

    If you said to them "Im getting my hair done here, do you want an appt also" then that is a different story and they pay for themselves.
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  • You should have discussed this with your bridesmaids before making the appointments. Typically, if you are requiring the professional, you pay. If you gave them the option of getting their hair professionally done, then you don't have to pay. If you just went ahead and told them you were making appointments, you need to pay for everyone. For those not with you, if you're paying for everyone, give them the money or ask the salons if you can pay in advance for them.
  • If you're requiring them to get it professionally done, then you need to pay.  If so, find out the salons where your other two BMs are having their hair done and call them with a cc # to pay or take a check over a day or two before the wedding.  If you casually said to them "Hey I'm going to call & make my hair appointment do you want to get your hair done too?" and they said said they'd rather go somewhere else, then you're off the hook for paying for it.
  • You don't have to pay for anyone to get their hair done but yourself, so long as you don't require them to have it done professionally.  Do the people you made the appt's for know that you've done it?  If not, I would shoot them a quick email:

    Hey Sally,

    I'm having my hair done at abc salon.  They charge $50 for an up-do.  Would you like me to make you an appointment?

    gris

    Otherwise, it is a nice gesture to pay for your oot'ers hair.  I don't think it's wrong for you to only pay for their's and not the BM's who went to a different salon. 
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_hair-issue?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:e4359a1a-c103-478a-a750-e1d8154d75e7Post:40b67833-4cf7-4467-9ac5-e2a917bbd34f">Hair Issue HELP!</a>:
    [QUOTE]I have 4 bridesmaids, two of which are out of towners, two live in the same town as I do. When I made my hair appointment, I made appointments for my two out-of-town bridesmaids at the same place I'll be going (I've been seeing the same stylist for about 3 years!) I also made appts for my flower girl and jr. bridesmaid who also live out of town... However my two in-town bridesmaids asked if it was ok for their own stylists to do their hair, since they're the most comfortable with them. I said fine since I'm not having them all have their hair the same way. (They all have different dresses too). But now I have a dillema... Am I supposed to pay for my bridesmaids to get their hair done? If so, how do I pay for my other bridesmaids when they won't be with me? Or is it ok to just pay for the out-of-towners since they're already making the trip up here? I don't want to treat them differently just because they don't live where I'm getting married... OR can I just pay for my child attendants and have my bridesmaids pay for themselves?? I'm at a loss! Any advice would be appreciated!
    Posted by sjgrismer[/QUOTE]

    <div>You only have to pay if you are requiring it be done professionally.  If you choose to pay anyways, it's always nice but not necessary.  If you want to pay for your BM's going to other salons, you can get them a gift card to that salon. </div><div>
    </div><div>All of my girls chose to get their hair and/or makeup done with me, and I gave them all gift cards towards it, but not for the full amount.  </div>
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  • Thanks for the advice. And it's true I should have discussed this with them before hand, but everything seemed to be going so smoothly I guess it just totally slipped my mind! I'm kind of on a budget but I'm absolutely willing to pay for everyone if it' comes down to it. And I'm pretty certain my other bridesmaids are expecting to have to pay for their own hair. But I absolutely didn't say they had to get their hair done professionaly, I think it's just something that everyone assumed they'd do because it's a wedding after all! LOL! Thanks for all the advice! :)
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