STD, RSVP:No..Do I still send an invite?

Sharpschruter22

After sending out our Save the Dates, a few family members let us know they wouldn't be able to come. I have a tight guest list, so I really appreciate them letting me know.

I'm pretty sure I already know the answer, I would like your thoughts though. Do I still send them an invitation if they have declined at the STD stage?

I imagine that circumstances can always change so it would probably be a good idea to send one. I just don't want them to be irritated because they may think I forgot they already declined...

Should I include a little note saying I know they said they wouldn't be able to come, but I thought they might want to see the invitation and if their circumstances change, they would be welcome?

What say you?

Summer2011Bride

I would definitely send the invitation because, like you said, circumstances might change, and if I was given an STD, even if I said I probably couldn't come, I'd expect an invitation. We had that happen with a few people who intitially said no, but then were able to come after all.

I don't think you need to include a note, but if you want to, that'd probably be fine. I would probably leave out the part about wanting to see the invitation and just say, "I know we spoke earlier and said you probably couldn't come. If your plans happen to change, we'd love for you to be there!"

ootmother2

They don't have to reply at all to an STD.  That's just information for them in case they want to attend and know already that they will be available on that date.

KellyBrian2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_std-rsvpnodo-i-still-send-an-invite?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:e4efe475-0cb6-4bbc-a895-a78e609d7febPost:2c8bc298-0d6c-4c49-935a-c1e2952a5b04">STD, RSVP:No..Do I still send an invite?</a>:
[QUOTE]After sending out our Save the Dates, a few family members let us know they wouldn't be able to come. I have a tight guest list, so I really appreciate them letting me know. I'm pretty sure I already know the answer, I would like your thoughts though. Do I still send them an invitation if they have declined at the STD stage?<strong> I imagine that circumstances can always change so it would probably be a good idea to send one.</strong> I just don't want them to be irritated because they may think I forgot they already declined... Should I include a little note saying I know they said they wouldn't be able to come, but I thought they might want to see the invitation and if their circumstances change, they would be welcome? What say you?
Posted by Sharpschruter22[/QUOTE]

You're gut is right. Send them an invite and do not count on them not attending until you receive your formal RSVP back with a decline from them.

Sharpschruter22

In Response to Re:STD, RSVP:No..Do I still send an invite?:[QUOTE]They don't have to reply at all to an STD.nbsp; That's just information for them in case they want to attend and know already that they will be available on that date. Posted by ootmother2[/QUOTE]

...I know this. I didn't ask for anyone to reply to it. My aunt approached me to let me know they won't be able to be there.

ootmother2

I'm sorry, I posted too soon

Sharpschruter22

In Response to Re:STD, RSVP:No..Do I still send an invite?:[QUOTE]I'm sorry, I posted too soon Posted by ootmother2[/QUOTE]


No worries! I just didn't want everyone to think I'm a dolt who doesn't know how a STD works. Lol.

DramaGeek

Most of my family lives across the country, so they know generally before they send the STD that we won't be able to attend.  If I got the STD and not an invite I'd be pretty hurt, though, even though I can't attend.  Something about feeling left out/forgotten because we live so far away.  So yes, send the invite anyway and if they mention it tell them you remembered that they said they wouldn't be able to make it but you wanted them to know that if circumstances change you'd love for them to be there.

Sharpschruter22

In Response to Re:STD, RSVP:No..Do I still send an invite?:[QUOTE]Most of my family lives across the country, so they know generally before they send the STD that we won't be able to attend. nbsp;If I got the STD and not an invite I'd be pretty hurt, though, even though I can't attend. nbsp;Something about feeling left out/forgotten because we live so far away. nbsp;So yes, send the invite anyway and if they mention it tell them you remembered that they said they wouldn't be able to make it but you wanted them to know that if circumstances change you'd love for them to be there. Posted by DramaGeek[/QUOTE]

I would feel the same way. This is what I will do. Thanks for your help, ladies!