co worker conundrum

JillyM79

My wedding is June 18th, so yes I have a little time to think about this but...

I teach in a fairly small school & this is my 10th year there. Is there an easy way to narrow down gauging who should be at my wedding? Yes of course my close friends but I pretty much talk to everyone else at work too. I don't want them to be mad if they aren't invited (especially if they expect to be invited), but seriously I couldn't afford EVERYONE.

Also - what do you think the rule of thumb is for "+1s" if there will be a large group of coworkers? Obviously the married ones get the Mr & Mrs but etiquette on the rest of the bunch? There are some people whom I know their SOs but unsure if others are dating.

Thoughts?

Thanks bunches in advance!

apple_green

If you don't want to invite everyone, just invite those that you hang out with outside of work... those who you'd feel comfortable calling and inviting to dinner.

As for +1s, I prefer giving everyone a guest. However, not everyone does - at least give a +1 to the ones who are in a relationship.

quotequeen

If they are in a serious relationship, their SO needs to be invited (by name, not as a plus 1).  If you don't know them well enough to know whether they are in a relationship, that's probably a good sign that those folks don't need to be invited.

akhensley81

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_co-worker-conundrum?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:e553c5c0-5d68-4c00-99f8-84fa9d0e1fe3Post:5683f8f5-35b7-4607-a52c-17e5c366de50">Re: co worker conundrum</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>If you don't want to invite everyone, just invite those that you hang out with outside of work... those who you'd feel comfortable calling and inviting to dinner. </strong>As for +1s, I prefer giving everyone a guest. However, not everyone does - at least give a +1 to the ones who are in a relationship.
Posted by apple_green[/QUOTE]

This.

But also make a conscious effort not to talk about the wedding at work, especially to people who you know you are not planning to invite. It's a great way to mislead people and end up with hurt feelings, if you're not planning to invite everyone.

JillyM79

Thanks, everyone!
 I'm especially in total agreement with keeping wedding talk at a minimum. We had a back to school luncheon & people I was inviting were asking me about wedding plans BUT also at the table were those I had no intention of being there so I just kept the answer to "good" "yes it's approaching quickly" as well as "it's coming along" and that's about it. I didn't want to talk about it and perhaps lead on those that might think they'd be there.
It's a good point to make about not knowing if they're in a serious relationship, perhaps they shouldn't be there at all (i.e. not as close with them).
I'll see how this work year goes. There's a lot of work to do Thanks again.
Good luck ,everyone!