Wedding Etiquette Forum

Flowers and Florists, Mother in Law drama...

My future mother in law stated to my mother in passing that she knew she was obligated to pay for our flowers for the wedding...The problem is, she never said anything to me or her son about this, whats a good way to bring this up? I told her I was going to meet with the florist next week and she said nothing...Should I assume that she no longer wants to cover this and pay for it myself? HELP!

Re: Flowers and Florists, Mother in Law drama...

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    If it was just in passing, and not to you, and you told her you were going to the florist, I'd just assume that it's on you to pay for them.
    If she gives you money for them later, yay, pleasant surprise!
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    Why does she think she is obligated to pay for your flowers? 

    If FMIL has not mentioned paying for the flowers to you or FI directly, I would go to your florist appointment prepared to pay for them yourself.  If she comes to you later and says that she would like to cover the cost, she can pay for the flowers when the time comes.
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    I'm sure if she wants to pay for them, she will eventually say something, but it isn't appropriate of you to ask her about it. Why would she say she was obligated? Had she previously said she would and realizes she needs to honor that?
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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    I would say in passing that you setup a meeting the the florist.   See what she says?  If nothing then yes you can assume she isn't giving you anything.

    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
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    Kindasparkley is right. In the old days when the brides parents paid for the wedding the grooms parents paid for the rd the officiant and bouquets for the bride and the BM. That is probably what she's referring to
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    Thank you everyone! I never asked her to pay for my flowers, I was not expecting it either, but when I told my mom we were going to meet with a florist she asked if my mother in law was coming because she stated she was paying for them. Were doing 90%-95% of the wedding ourselves and I would never expect anyone to pay for anything, just to be clear! But thank you all for the advice!
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    In Response to <a href="">Re: Flowers and Florists, Mother in Law drama...</a>:
    [QUOTE]Some families consider it a tradition for the groom's family to pay for the bride's bouquet only.  She may have been referring to that.  If she hasn't brought it up to you or your FI, I would assume that there is no payment forthcoming and budget for the flowers yourself.
    Posted by KindaSparkly[/QUOTE]

    Thank you for that! I know were not having that tradition, my parents are doing what they can and I couldnt ask for anything else but to have them with me on that day. I never even thought about "old traditons" like that, so thank you!!
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