Grooms Father not Invited

Inkeduptara

My fiance's father is a "piece of work"  He has assaulted numerous people in the family including my fiance'.  How or who should I put at the back of the church to keep him away?

ETA:  It was the fiance's choice to not invite him.  He does not want his father at any of it, wedding or reception.

[Deleted User]

I agree, especially if he has a history of assaulting people, you wouldnt want a guest hurt at the wedding.

Calypso1977

i would hire a guard for both places, but honestly, a church is a public place and your wedding ceremony is technically open to anyone who wishes to witness it.  he cant be stopped from entering, only removed if he acts up.  the venue however is private (i assume) and a guard could prevent him from entering there.

NatandIsaac

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_grooms-father-not-invited?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:eb64d79d-c9a4-4538-8555-22ab156a2c06Post:47ac8b59-ea35-4a7e-a55f-e5f72c257508">Re: Grooms Father not Invited</a>:
[QUOTE]i would hire a guard for both places, but honestly, a church is a public place and your wedding ceremony is technically open to anyone who wishes to witness it.  he cant be stopped from entering, only removed if he acts up.  the venue however is private (i assume) and a guard could prevent him from entering there.
Posted by Calypso1977[/QUOTE]

<div>City hall is a public place; a church is private property, and while most are pretty welcoming, they are not required to let everyone in. I for one, cannot get into the Mormon Temple. If you discuss the situation with the church, then it may agree not to admit your FI's father.</div>

NuggetBrain

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_grooms-father-not-invited?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:eb64d79d-c9a4-4538-8555-22ab156a2c06Post:7ee88192-3217-49c9-8190-14e9a3072892">Re: Grooms Father not Invited</a>:
[QUOTE]And be sure to notify your reception venue also.  It's likely that they already have a security department that will be on duty for all events, and you want them to know about this and about the security guard you've hired.
Posted by Kristin789[/QUOTE]

This.  The venue might even have security that is available to use without you having to hire someone separately.  Or at the very least, they can put you in touch with a legit and legal security company to use.

vlknox

We have the same situation and might be employing a security guard as well.

NillaWafer10

Definitely hire security guards!  You don't want to be worrying about whether or not he will get past Uncle Henry and Cousin Jed.

Inkeduptara

Thanks for all the replies everyone!  I will look in to getting someone put at the door.  I do know a church is private not public, so he is not entitled to be there.  The hall is just a FC, and I dont think they have any security.  I will just have to keep someone at the door there too.

I will talk to the fiance about his take on it, and if he feels we really need one.  I do not want any altercations at the ceremony or reception, and I am hoping he just wont show up.  That would be the adult thing, but I doubt his past actions have proven him "adult" enough to handle not being invited.


Thanks again

Inkeduptara

Ok another dumb question, but I have googled and didnt find any local bouncer/ security.  How does one find someone?

LD1970

This looks like there are some good ones possibly:  http://www.google.com/search?sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8&q=pennsylvania+security+guards

I don't know where you are in PA, so I won't point you to a company specifically.

Also, make sure to give the guard a photo of your FI's father.

Inkeduptara

Thanks.  I dont think they will need a photo they are identical the FIL is just fat lol!  But that is a stellar suggestion, one I would have over looked, thanks!