I hope I didn't have a bridezilla moment

amyelise25

A few of my girlfriends that live 4 hours away have discussed doing a weekend together to "sort of" celebrate for the wedding and to spend time together.  The only other pre-wedding gathering is a female family only beach weekend where there isn't room for my friends (long story). 

I was asked yesterday if I would rather go to them or have them come to me.  I said I would prefer if they came to me because things will be busy (approx. 4-6 weeks out from the wedding) and I would have more fun celebrating for the wedding in this area.  Unless my friends lived in a cool city (which they don't), I just prefer the offerings in my area. 

They haven't made a decision yet, but I feel sort of guilty requesting that all of them travel to me and then having them do it again a month later.  But then my FI and co-workers keep reassuring me that I'm not a bridezilla for wanting people to go out of their way a little for my wedding.  I did two back-to-back trips for each of their weddings.  Plus planned food/games. 

So... bridezilla or not?  Anyone else make their friends/WP travel to them?

Girlie1030

So they're all in the same town yes?  If so, I wouldn't call you a bridezilla for requesting they come to you but it would certainly make more sense for you to go to them.

MyUserName1

They asked you a question and you answered honestly.  That's not bridezilla.  If you had, apropos of nothing, demanded that they come to you for a party, that's bridezilla.

kroot87

If you're "making" them come to you, I think it's beyond ridiculous. I can't really tell from your post, but it sounds like that might be the case. But if they approached you to ask what you prefer, and everyone agrees upon the travel situation, I don't see a problem.

Lolagirl2012

I have the same situation, 4 out of my 7 bridesmaids are making the trip, the other 3 said it was too far.  You just have to be prepared that some will say that.

amyelise25

They did ask what I prefer and I said that I would prefer if they came down to me.    It's one of those situations where I'm sure they would love for me to come to them because it would be easier on them and I would love for them to come to me because it would be SO much easier on me.  Plus I would have much more fun with any bachelorette-type outing in my area versus their area. 

jemmini6

They asked, you answered, so that was not a bridezilla thing to do. 

However, I know this went into your reasoning, so I just wanted to give you my experience, but 4 - 6 weeks out from the wedding really wasn't all that busy for me (not saying it absolutely won't be for you, but I know I expected it to be busier than it was, so maybe you have the same 'false' expectation).  I could have easily travelled a few hours away without worrying about anything for the wedding.  Just a thought.

However, I know you said your area is better though too, which is also a huge consideration.  If they are okay with making the drive, they can easily carpool and not be out too much money for the trip, so I still don't think it's a bridezilla thing to prefer they come to you.  Just be willing to work with them on times and don't freak out if someone can't make it.

jessicabessica

I don't think it was a bridezilla moment at all.  They asked, you answered.  I would add that it may be easier for them to plan if it's in their area, if that's a consideration for you.  Also, why are you talking about this with your coworkers?  I would avoid talking to people about an event to which they are not invited, whether it's a wedding or a night out.

emeejeeayen

Could maybe ALL of you travel? I know you said you didn't want to travel, but it might be really fun to go to NYC? I recently did the drive from NYC to DC and back and we drove through Balitmore. Was not awful at all. 

amyelise25

I'm a big traveler (originally from Philly) but I think the gals aren't up for paying for a hotel room, especially in a pricey city like NYC.  They are more the 'let's crash in each other's houses' types.  Great idea though.

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-hope-i-didnt-have-a-bridezilla-moment?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:ecfa87a0-29b8-403b-a062-4c13329ed084Post:eacf5fea-b678-480b-9927-3222eea00e92">Re: I hope I didn't have a bridezilla moment</a>:
[QUOTE]Could maybe ALL of you travel? I know you said you didn't want to travel, but it might be really fun to go to NYC? I recently did the drive from NYC to DC and back and we drove through Balitmore. Was not awful at all. 
Posted by emeejeeayen[/QUOTE]

emeejeeayen

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-hope-i-didnt-have-a-bridezilla-moment?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:ecfa87a0-29b8-403b-a062-4c13329ed084Post:7fbdfb5b-a5f9-4e78-8073-968477afd742">Re: I hope I didn't have a bridezilla moment</a>:
[QUOTE]I'm a big traveler (originally from Philly) but I think the gals aren't up for paying for a hotel room, especially in a pricey city like NYC.  They are more the 'let's crash in each other's houses' types.  Great idea though. In Response to Re: I hope I didn't have a bridezilla moment :
Posted by amyelise25[/QUOTE]

<div>You could get a cheaper hotel in Jersey City or Brooklyn? It's not as expensive as people think for just 1 night. Just sayin' :)</div>