Wedding Etiquette Forum

How do I answer this?

So....obviously from my ticker you can tell I am not anywhere near planning anything, wedding wise. Currently just saving up (FI and I are the only ones paying) and daydreaming. Well my overexcited mother knows some 23 year old girl who is a photographer, but she isn't licensed or anything, doesn't run a photography business, etc. My mom told her I would consider her for the wedding, and told her to send me a friend request on Facebook, and now she keeps writing on my wall. Some of the most recent:

"so am i your photographer /> />>>?????"

"have u talked to ur mom???? she said u would maybe hire me?????"

"am i ur photographer for the wedding???? i need to no so i can plan around it????"

I have been responding with this exact message: "We are not planning anything at the moment. When we do begin to plan our wedding, we will consider all our options and should we decide to consider you, we will contact you to discuss pricing and packages. Have a great day!"

However, I must not be wording it correctly, because she will not stop posting these messages on my wall. I have never met her, so it's kind of strange that she is posting it so much. I don't want to be mean to or embarass her, but it's driving me crazy. I just want to put "NO" and be done with it. Every time she posts these, people comment on it and recommend photographers they know.

Anyway, sorry for the long post. What should I say to her that will get her to stop?

ETA: Oh, my mom says she is "the best" and I should just hire her already. Sigh.

Re: How do I answer this?

  • Um, I'm not even 23 yet and I type better than that and would never bombard someone  and I'm not trying to start up my own business.
    Have you seen her work yet?
  • Lol. I think it's the only choice I have left, but I thought it would be too mean. I worry too much about that I suppose...
  • NebbNebb member
    10000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    Personally, I would tell her that the way she is going about this is completely unprofessional. If she is planning to become a photographer some time in the future, she needs to learn how to properly interact with potential clients. You are currently not interested in her services and would like for her to stop asking.
  • She sent me an email that had some pictures of a wedding she has done before. I didn't think they were that bad, but they seemed like something anybody with a camera could do. Not my style I guess.

    And I don't know why all her questions end with ?????? either lol.

  • Tell her that you can not bring yourself to hire a woman that abuses punctuation.
    image
  • Thanks for the advice everybody! I think I'm just going to defriend her and when my mom asks me about it (which she definitely will) I will just tell her what I told you all.
  • NebbNebb member
    10000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    If you just defriend her without saying anything, she will just continue trying to contact you, or trying to contact you through your mother.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_answer-this?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:edb05a56-81d1-4497-bf27-a08243cfebcaPost:b1cf9fbb-d225-4c40-a16b-f60bd7c3b35d">Re: How do I answer this?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I agree with Jill on this one... not only is she irritating, but constantly begging for your business in <strong>text talk</strong> would drive me absolutely batty. Not a great way to start off a professional relationship, so I would just defriend her, and never look for her again.
    Posted by mrs.jesse[/QUOTE]

    I just had a mental image of hiring her, and receiving non-stop text messages from her until the day of the wedding. *shivers*
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_answer-this?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:edb05a56-81d1-4497-bf27-a08243cfebcaPost:70b0f655-3dfc-471e-8593-0a812b31f773">Re: How do I answer this?</a>:
    [QUOTE]If you just defriend her without saying anything, she will just continue trying to contact you, or trying to contact you through your mother.
    Posted by Nebb[/QUOTE]

    This is true. Ugh. I am not confrontational at all, but I think I'm going to have to suck it up this time and tell her how unprofessional she is being. Thanks!
  • "Please, refrain from contacting me regarding the wedding. We will not be choosing vendors for at least another year, and your constant contact is off-putting."
    image
  • NebbNebb member
    10000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    Im totally for defriending her btw, she just sounds immature.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_answer-this?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:edb05a56-81d1-4497-bf27-a08243cfebcaPost:a9a2eeb1-a54d-4811-8c41-4fcfc0c31199">Re: How do I answer this?</a>:
    [QUOTE]"Please, refrain from contacting me regarding the wedding. We will not be choosing vendors for at least another year, and your constant contact is off-putting."
    Posted by jasmineh7777[/QUOTE]

    I like this. Lol. I just hope her feelings aren't or anything. She seems like a sweet person, just an annoying one too lol.
  • Thanks for the advice everyone. I will probably go with what Nebb said and then just defriend her. Hopefully that will be some sort of wake-up call for her and she will learn not to do this.
  • NebbNebb member
    10000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    Unfortunately the truth hurts, and what shes doing is just going to harm her career - youre doing her a huge favour by being honest.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_answer-this?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:edb05a56-81d1-4497-bf27-a08243cfebcaPost:055a056f-a356-4baa-8f7a-a865b78c0240">Re: How do I answer this?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: How do I answer this? : I like this. Lol. I just hope her feelings aren't or anything. She seems like a sweet person, just an annoying one too lol.
    Posted by sgervais88[/QUOTE]

    <div>Maybe it'll be good for her. You can't speak like that to a potential client and expect to be taken seriously, and someone needs to tell her so.</div>
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_answer-this?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:edb05a56-81d1-4497-bf27-a08243cfebcaPost:69a8243f-7e7a-4327-87e5-2f8d6b074035">Re: How do I answer this?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Also, I would tell your mom not to tell people you will consider them for the wedding in terms of anything. Tell her that if she finds someone she thinks you might want to work with to talk to YOU before she talks to THEM, and you will look into, to prevent this down the line.
    Posted by mrs.jesse[/QUOTE]

    Good idea! She has a friend that does cakes. Yes. We will definitely be having this talk very soon lol.
  • I agree Nebba and EmmaBride2B. She isn't helping her career by harassing anybody. I doubt I'm the only person she is doing this to.

    Thanks for all the advice! You ladies rock!
  • Tell her you're having a naked wedding and as such, all your suppliers will be naked too.

    Post it on her Facebook wall with 'Hope you're OK with that?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!!?!!??!???!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! (.) (.)

    I'd say she's suddenly find she's NOT free on the day of your wedding after all!!!
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_answer-this?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:edb05a56-81d1-4497-bf27-a08243cfebcaPost:95429b1d-a719-4392-8790-643b40f644d5">Re: How do I answer this?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Tell her you're having a naked wedding and as such, all your suppliers will be naked too. Post it on her Facebook wall with 'Hope you're OK with that?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!!?!!??!???!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! (.) (.) I'd say she's suddenly find she's NOT free on the day of your wedding after all!!!
    Posted by Smileykaz[/QUOTE]

    LOL. We'll call that one "Plan B".
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_answer-this?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:edb05a56-81d1-4497-bf27-a08243cfebcaPost:95429b1d-a719-4392-8790-643b40f644d5">Re: How do I answer this?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Tell her you're having a naked wedding and as such, all your suppliers will be naked too. Post it on her Facebook wall with 'Hope you're OK with that?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!!?!!??!???!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! (.) (.) I'd say she's suddenly find she's NOT free on the day of your wedding after all!!!
    Posted by Smileykaz[/QUOTE]

    Haha this post is great!
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