Shower Invite question

GinaV0822

My MOH and bridesmaids are graciously throwing me a bridal shower next month.  I was asked for a list of people who I would want to invite which I gave her.  I did not include the several close friends of mine that live in MN (I'm in Chicago).  I know they cannot come and I am meeting them in WI for a girls weekend soon and I have a suspicion they are going to do a little something at that time.  If they do, great, if not I am completely fine with that.  

My question is someone said that I should have sent them an invite for the one in Chicago.  I was just trying to be nice and not make them feel obligated to send a gift or anything like that.  I know they know I would love for them to come and that I'm thinking of them, but is not sending an invitation rude?  I was under the impression sending it to people you know 100% cannot come would be rude.  Now Im not so sure.

The invites just went out this past weekend so we can still send them to the 5 girls out of state if needed.

Advice please!

AddieCake

I think you should send the invitation. It's nice to include them even if they can't make it. It sounds like they are close enough friends to know you are not trying to get them to send a gift. 

[Deleted User]

IMO yes you should invite them even if they can't make it. My friends are all over the place but I invited everyone I wanted to be there anyway....some people who I thought wouldn't be able to make it because of the distance are actually coming. Yes there are people who can't make it and most wrote/called me to say they couldn't come. I told them that i understood and I didn't expect them to jump on a plane just for my shower I just wanted to extend the invite because I would have loved to have them there. Invite them anyway! They might surprise you and be able to make it. Also if they don't get an invite and find out about your shower they might be sad or hurt they didn't get invited.

Kate61487

I could go either way on this one.  On one hand if they are really close friends and you'd want them there if they could come, go ahead and invite them.  They should know that it's not a gift-grab.  How do you KNOW they can't come?  is it a schedule conflict? money issue?  I might go ahead and send it anyway, just in case they want to make it a road trip.

On the other hand - shower guest lists are very frequently limited to local guests (with the exception of, like, BP and moms).  The only OOT guests I included on my own shower guest list were those whose parents still lived in our home town - since it was a long weekend I thought they might make the trip / might be in town anyway.  I don't think I'd be offended if a friend had a shower a plane ride away and didn't invite me.