Knot absolutes broken, world still turns.

NuggetBrain

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_knot-absolutes-broken-world-still-turns?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:f0533d9f-0dd2-4aaa-8c09-f1c3977e4592Post:233c6fcc-d2d1-49ab-a3b7-b803c0859b86">Re: Knot absolutes broken, world still turns.</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>I still stand that a lot of the things mentioned here are tacky.</strong>  Just because they're common in "your area" doesn't make them completely awesome and not at all tacky.  It just means people have stopped caring.
Posted by kikibaby[/QUOTE]

Hence the "Knot absolutes". 

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_knot-absolutes-broken-world-still-turns?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:f0533d9f-0dd2-4aaa-8c09-f1c3977e4592Post:02cb3700-2155-4367-a939-045d3f5debcf">Re: Knot absolutes broken, world still turns.</a>:
[QUOTE]I've gotten invitations that say "Adults Only" which I've always found a little sketchy. I have no problem with not having kids at a wedding but there is no reason that needs to go on the invitation.
Posted by Bubbalub[/QUOTE]
this invitation didn't merely say "adults only", it actually said "no kids". lol

WildRumpus

Dollar dances are very common where wer're from. We're probably going to do one. Is that tacky? Probably. Oh well.

WildRumpus

We're also not doing a seating chart. I've never been to a wedding w/ a seating chart

saisongbird

We asked our parents for money.  Actually, I asked my dad about it first (divorced parents) and he came back with an offer and I said "no way are DH's parents going to agree to that.  Try again."  Yes, tacky, but you don't beat around the bush with this man, and I've always known that my parents were going to pay the majority of my wedding.  So my dad ended up arguing it out with my mom and DH told his parents what the deal was, and we got X from my parents and Y from his.  It worked out, but yes, we were THOSE people.  We had a beautiful wedding with all of our family and no one was left out, though...

Oh, and I didn't give my girls any input on dresses.  I've never been given input on a dress either, but I did keep the dresses to under $150.  And I subsidized the cost of shoes for the girls who didn't work full time (they were just told gold sandals).

emilyinchile

My friend put "cocktail attire" on her invites, which surprised me because she and her family are pretty up on etiquette in general, and it was pretty obvious from the invitations, the location (winery), and just knowing her that cocktail attire would be appropriate. However there was no mention of the fact that the whole thing was on grass/dirt, which would have actually been useful attire info in terms of choosing what shoes to wear. But yeah, world didn't end, wedding was gorgeous, and we had a blast.

polichik

At the very end of our wedding, I saw that there was a tip jar on the bar. I was kind of annoyed, since it had never been discussed, but oh well. That's all I can think of at the moment. All the other etiquette breaches that I've encountered were actually quite annoying. But I'm an uptight b, so there

BlueBoxBride

Personal Tackiness Confession: 

-Printed labels on the StDs. I'm standing behind this one, since my FI was nagging me about how we should have hired someone else to address them. So far, no one cares and he's the only person I know that gets into a tizzy if there's hand writing, labels or computerized calligraphy font. I might need to invest in getting him some smelling salts... 

-We have more than 2 registries. Because there aren't two stores that have exactly what we want and we would rather be able to use the completion discounts than not be able to after the wedding. We didn't register for 200 items at each or anything like that, and we managed to register for things we want in a wide variety of price points. 

-We're moving to Chicago around the same time as the wedding. I suggested we personally host a morning after breakfast/brunch in the new place so we could serve things like bagels, fruit salad... and keep the costs down. FI felt like we were combining a house warming with the day after brunch. 

-My parents were refusing to get involved with the wedding AT ALL, so I tried to be nice and offered that my father could help pick the music for my reception. OMFG... people are going to think they got into a Hot Tub Time Machine and walked into the Wedding Singer. Our father/daughter dance is going to be to "Don't Stop Believin'" by Journey. 

Worst Infractions I've Encountered: 

- Cash bar. I don't like having to stop by an ATM to get cash out. At least set up a credit card portable server so I can just start a tab. 

- No assigned seating. At the ONLY wedding I've been to with this, there weren't seats for us and we had to take turns holding each other's goblets while we tried eating the small plates from the buffet against a window sill. We left that wedding starving and it was in a very small Southern city with no food options. I'm emotionally scarred from this experience and I now hit the drive thru or something on the way to the reception venue just in case... There really is nothing worse than being stuck in a hotel room later hungry! 

- Three hours between the ceremony/reception. I don't want to go back to the hotel to change. Once I get out of uncomfortable clothing and shoes and into comfortable clothing and no shoes, there's no going back. I also don't feel like washing off the makeup I applied for the ceremony just so I can take a disco nap... 

-Bridezilla friend dumped me and another BM for 3+ years because we didn't send her thank you notes for being included in her wedding. We once asked on an etiquette board if we just missed the memo, and everyone thought we made it up and were trolling! 

-My sister sent out her wedding invitations by email. 

smokyhills

My FI asked his dad for money, which I didn't find out about until recently. I had a *very* bad night w/r/t money related issues several months ago (that have been resolved, now) and was in tears - which is NOT common for me at all. He went in the other room and phoned his dad and asked for a bit of help. As soon as I found out, I started negotiating the amount down, without being offensive. I explained that if at any point something came up and he couldn't, I'd understand, but that if he wanted to host the rehearsal dinner, that would be fabulous. Poor J. just wanted to help, and his dad didn't take offense to it at all.

kayakrunhike

My best friend did registry cards.  I wasn't bothered by this at all, honestly.  We did have three registries, but the one literally only had our everyday use dinner set on it.

One of my friends did a dollar dance- this was actually fun with the crowd at her wedding. I've been to weddings with most of the absolutes mentioned here- time gaps, starting late, etc.  I survived and really the only one that was completely annoying was the time gap.