Do I have to invite all extended family members?

cynthianath04

Hello

There are certain extended family members that I do not want to invite to the wedding for reasons too long to list. I want my wedding day to be shared with those that have made a positive impact on my life.

Am I obligated to invite all extended family members? Is it tactful to ask my mother to be my verbal messenger? Can I cite the capacity maximum at the location as an excuse not to invite all of my family members? I'm just afraid of offending family members.

Eloping is tempting, but I refuse to because I want my princess day. 

Thanks everyone!

iamjoesgurl

Is this a serious question?  Of course, you don't HAVE to do anything you don't want to do.  There is not a book of rules for weddings and you need to make the decision of who to invite with your FI.  If that is not including your entire family, then that is the decision.  I don't think you need to have anyone to explain why someone was/wasn't invited.  If they don't get an invitation, then they aren't invited and that's how they'll find out.

brilibby4

Um, no. 

ohwhynot

You're not obligated, but as you acknowledge, your treading in dangerous waters if you pick and choose among the extended relatives (which it sounds like you plan).  If you do this, you need to stand by your own decision and your own reasons - don't hide behind mommy.  If your criterion is "you're invited if you've been a positive influence in my life" then you should be able to defend that criterion if asked about it. 

cynthianath04

Thanks everyone for the feedback. I really do appreciate it. I feel as if I've known the answer all along but needed a reality check.