people bringing dates?

cm.gardner

The budget for my wedding is small, my grandmother is paying for it. We originally wanted to elope but she was not going to allow that so here we are planning a wedding for 1.30.10. Anyways when I made out the guest list I only accounted for people bringing dates if they had been in a relationship for awhile and I am actually friends with ther SO. It worked out well since everyone going is at least pretty good friends with some other people who are invited. Everyone is family or friends so most tables would be all people who know each other. The MOH has had an on again off again boyfriend for the past three years. Im not overly fond of him for the way he has treated her. I didnt give it a second thought when they had been "off" for the past 7-8 months and left him off the guest list.  Well now 2 months before the wedding they are "on" again...for now. I just told her I wasn't really planning on inviting him and I am already over the guest limit. She seemed surprised and kind of upset? Am I wrong? Should I just shut up and let him come? I also am not inviting some family to keep the guest list down. I want to be fair but their are other people i would prefer to hang out with that I didnt invite because of cost.

ring_pop

She's your MOH. Let her bring a date.

janedoe1113a

I agree, let her bring a date.

mocha beans

Yes, you let her bring a date.  On or off again or not, she's still in a long term relationship, half the time.  I'd be peeved too.

Night_Sprite

It is not your place to decide who she has a relationship with.  They've been involved for 3 years.  Let her bring him.

Night_Sprite

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_people-bringing-dates?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:f5667b27-df0d-4b90-9141-921a62cd1cbbPost:e4307099-f378-4ece-9cc1-8219a22426b3">people bringing dates?</a>:
[QUOTE]The budget for my wedding is small, my grandmother is paying for it. We originally wanted to elope but she was not going to allow that so here we are planning a wedding for 1.30.10. Anyways when I made out the guest list I only accounted for people bringing dates if they had been in a relationship for awhile and I am actually friends with ther SO. It worked out well since everyone going is at least pretty good friends with some other people who are invited. Everyone is family or friends so most tables would be all people who know each other. The MOH has had an on again off again boyfriend for the past three years. Im not overly fond of him for the way he has treated her. I didnt give it a second thought when they had been "off" for the past 7-8 months and left him off the guest list.  Well now 2 months before the wedding they are "on" again...for now. I just told her I wasn't really planning on inviting him and I am already over the guest limit. She seemed surprised and kind of upset? Am I wrong? Should I just shut up and let him come? I also am not inviting some family to keep the guest list down. I want to be fair but their are other people i would prefer to hang out with that I didnt invite because of cost.
Posted by cm.gardner[/QUOTE]

lyndausvi

yes you are wrong.. Just because YOU did not except it to be a 'real' relationship does not mean it's not.

thesuninherhead

If they're together, and she is in your bridal party, she deserves an 'and guest' invitation, IMO.

smokeybailey

Why in the world is this even a question? This woman is the most honored woman in your life (presumably) and you are questioning whether she can bring a guest?  If she wants to bring a 1 legged pirate with a hook for a hand, what do you care?  She is your homie.  Treat her accordingly.

thesuninherhead

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_people-bringing-dates?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:f5667b27-df0d-4b90-9141-921a62cd1cbbPost:ea80249a-44a4-4b31-9547-8b16303e3d9b">Re: people bringing dates?</a>:
[QUOTE]She is your homie.  Treat her accordingly.
Posted by smokeybailey[/QUOTE]
This is what I meant! ;P

sucrets4

Is one person really going to be that expensive?  (the answer is no)

You should invite your MOH with her bf, regardless of your feelings of him and their history.

RachNRich

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_people-bringing-dates?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:f5667b27-df0d-4b90-9141-921a62cd1cbbPost:ea80249a-44a4-4b31-9547-8b16303e3d9b">Re: people bringing dates?</a>:
[QUOTE]Why in the world is this even a question? This woman is the most honored woman in your life (presumably) and you are questioning whether she can bring a guest?  If she wants to bring a 1 legged pirate with a hook for a hand, what do you care?  She is your homie.  Treat her accordingly.
Posted by smokeybailey[/QUOTE]

Everything about your response is perfect. Everything.

squirrly

Yes, she should get to bring her boyfriend. 

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

Honestly, you should assume everyone will be in a committed relationship when you make your guest list. Too late now, but this is the reason for that. WP members are usually allowed to bring dates anyway, whether or not they are single.

jamm2019

Yes!  Allow her to bring him.  You aren't going to be spending every waking moment with her and him at the reception anyway.