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eating DURING the ceremony

I would like to know the proper protocol for dealing with parents that think it is totally OK to EAT DURING THE CEREMONY.  I feel that it is classless and horrible.  Am I wrong here?  I cant imagine looking up and seeing people shoving food in their mouths.  
Good grief.
Thanks.

Re: eating DURING the ceremony

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    Why would parents be eating during the ceremony?  Do you mean that they would be giving some pieces of cereal to their kids to keep them occupied and quiet during your ceremony?  Where is your ceremony being held that their could be people eating during it?  If you are having an all in one venue, I would ask them to not put any food out until during your ceremony as you don't want people snacking on anything until after the ceremony.
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    Just read your post on the asian weddings board - much better explanation! I agree as an American I would find this bizarre...I think you need to explain to your fiance how uncomfortable this would make you, and surely as your wedding will be a blending of two cultures, his Korean guests can respect this. I would, however, spread the fact that dinner will be after the ceremony by word of mouth, just to avoid any shock or confusion when guests arrive.
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    Yeah, that's weird. We offered bottled water during our outdoor ceremony, but that was it.
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    edited November 2012
    If it's a cultural thing, can you try to meet in the middle?  Could you have a few stations of hors d'oeurves that people could help themself to while they are waiting for the ceremony to begin?  I've been to American weddings that had that, it was nice.  That might be a way to have people not eating during the ceremony but have your ILs not feel like everyone will starve.  If someone keeps a plate of cheese and crackers and munches during the ceremony, you just need to let it go (and I really don't think it would be that disruptive).

    Where is your FI on this?  Have you ever been to a Korean wedding where there was eating during the ceremony?  Is it really people stuffing their faces and talking loudly, as you've described?  I have no idea.
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    edited November 2012
    I feel like you're leaving out some pretty important details. I think if it's a culture thing then it's just not as simple as "Someone is EATING during the Ceremony! OMG" . It's a bit different when you explain the situation or at least someone else seemed to allude to this being a big cultural difference. If it is you need to find a compromise because of the two cultural differences. It can't just be all your way or his way.  But if this is a tradition for their culture I don't know if I'd feel comfortable taking that away from them or my FI.
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    Ditto PPs.  You left out some serious information here; after reading your post on the Asian Weddings board, it's a little clearer that it's a cultural thing, not just rude in-laws as you are making it seem.  If the wedding is in Korea, I think you need to consider local custom and tailor accordingly.
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    My FI's family is Indian.  Every family wedding I've been to with him has had food served during the ceremony.  If you don't want people eating, then don't serve food.  I'm not sure what the problem is... are they asking you to serve food?  I personally don't see anything wrong with eating during the ceremony.  In my FI's family's case, the Hindu ceremonies can last up to 3 hours, so food becomes necessary!  We're not having a Hindu ceremony, and our ceremony will only be a half hour, but we're still serving drinks.

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    I think it's WAY more rude to flip out about cultural differences and be intolerant abouy them than it is to munch on crackers during a wedding. Seriously, crackers will ruin your wedding? Get a grip girl.
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    I think., as melb stated, if the ceremony is long and it's a cultrual thing, you have to go with it. You are not just marrying the person, you are marrying the heritage they honor, and it becomes yours too!

    If it's an anglicized ceremony ~45 mins ish give or take, then ask if there is a compromise. If it's a traditional ceremony that can last over 1.5 hours, give 'em food!
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    Wow, way to omit a lot of important stuff in your OP  ::rolls eyes::

    I'm all out picking my battles,  I'm not sure in the case it's one would be worth fighting. it's a cultural thing with them.   I think compromise is in order.

    On another note people drank during my ceremony and I heard through the grapevine they hit up the candy buffet also. I didn't notice AT ALL.  Actually, I didn't notice anything other than the officiant and my DH.  It was almost like we were by ourselves enough there were 140+ people in the audience.

    I don't think it will be as big of a deal as you are making it out to be.







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    edited December 2012
    Are they hypoglycemic (sp?) or diabetic? Some people just really need to eat at certain times and more often than others or blood sugars run low and stuff. And are you talking cut up a steak and eating an entire meal or are you talking about a small snack like peanuts or something?
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    You left out some keys details in your explanation of your problem. I'm also an American woman living in Korea, marrying a Korean man, and while we opted for a traditional Korean wedding rather than one in a wedding hall, the type you're referring to, I was just thrilled to be accepted into their family. Multicultural weddings are still not the norm in Korea, particularly with the man being the Korean and the woman being the foreigner, and the fact that this family has opened their minds and hearts to a non-traditional future is quite a big deal. When you marry your husband, you are marrying into an entire culture and if you aren't ready to embrace cultural differences, you might want to rethink your marriage, as there are way more serious cultural things to come.
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