Wedding Etiquette Forum

Would this be weird?

We are the parents of the bride. My H was in a horrible accident more than three years ago. There were seven firefighters/EMTs that each played a very integral role in his survival. Now, five of the 'Magnificent 7' as we call them still are quite close to us and DD and the rest of us would like to invite them to the wedding. They truly went above and beyond, even checking on us when H was hospitalized elsewhere, after we got home, helping us with home maintenance in their free time  etc. etc. They became quite special to our entire family, and we to them. (I know EMTs see a zillion accidents. This one was pretty wild, still sticks in their minds and a bond has been formed. Several of them have told us that it was a life-altering incident for them as well.) We still see them often, some more than others and have done a few social things with them (cookouts, housewarming, retirement/birthday parties, etc.)

Two do not live here any longer (moved far away) but the other five do. Would it be weird to invite any of them? Would you invite all seven, just the five that still live around here or just the two or three super-duper special ones? (Headcount/space is not an issue. Their S/Os would be included, of course.)

There are actually several other firefighters and their wives already on the guest list as they have been family friends for years or are friends of DD and/or her FI. So, there would be A LOT of people from the department there. It's not like they'd be weirdly singled out or anything, plus I've known them all from my years at the newspaper. And they are a helluva lot of fun! 

What do you think? 

ETA sorry this turned into freakin' novel!
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Re: Would this be weird?

  • Since you socialize with them still, I don't think it would be even a little bit weird to invite them.
  • I say invite them. Do you keep in touch with the two that moved away? If yes, I would invite them as well, but if they moved away two years ago and you haven't contacted each other since or something like that then I would say they do not need to be invited (however, if they are still special to you, which it sounds like they may be, and you would like to have them there, why not invite them?). If my H was one of these firefighters and we'd attended each other's social events and such I don't think I would find it strange that we were invited.
  • I would invite all 7.  I'd probably include a personal note to each as well, but I'm mushy like that.

    God, those guys are amazing.  I don't know how they do the job they do, but I'm very happy they do it.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_would-this-be-weird?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:f85c319c-5b88-46ca-8ad4-d4066edbe988Post:43080b40-8602-450a-b857-a11f7787177f">Re: Would this be weird?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Since you socialize with them still, I don't think it would be even a little bit weird to invite them.
    Posted by MyUserName1[/QUOTE]

    <div>Should we nix the two that moved away then? We don't see them any more. </div>
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_would-this-be-weird?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:f85c319c-5b88-46ca-8ad4-d4066edbe988Post:911f8e76-c8ca-494b-a783-6370ceb3177d">Re: Would this be weird?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Would this be weird? : Should we nix the two that moved away then? We don't see them any more. 
    Posted by willywally5[/QUOTE]

    <div>Are you still in contact at all?  Facebook friends, etc?  If so, I would go ahead and invite them.  They don't have to attend.  But if you'd have to track them down, I wouldn't.</div>
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_would-this-be-weird?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:f85c319c-5b88-46ca-8ad4-d4066edbe988Post:10b380a8-93e5-4868-8cd3-0af67fca98c6">Re: Would this be weird?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I would invite all 7.  I'd probably include a personal note to each as well, but I'm mushy like that. <strong>God, those guys are amazing.  I don't know how they do the job they do, but I'm very happy they do it.</strong>
    Posted by Girlie1030[/QUOTE]

    <div>Me, too!</div><div>
    </div><div>I was very privileged during my days at the newspaper and did many features (whole sections, actually) on the FD. Even had my own gear and got to go on calls with them.  I got to know many of them quite well and they are nothing short of amazing. </div><div>
    </div><div>I think the only ones we're on the fence about are the two who moved away. But gosh, there wouldn't be a dad to walk the bride down the aisle if it weren't for all of them! (I'm mushy like that, too!)</div>
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_would-this-be-weird?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:f85c319c-5b88-46ca-8ad4-d4066edbe988Post:dd232bc6-86b5-42c0-9085-f8282871d031">Re: Would this be weird?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Would this be weird? : <strong>Are you still in contact at all?  Facebook friends, etc?</strong>  If so, I would go ahead and invite them.  They don't have to attend.  But if you'd have to track them down, I wouldn't.
    Posted by MyUserName1[/QUOTE]

    <div>One, yes. The other one we'd have to track down so probably a no on him. </div><div>
    </div><div>Thanks for the input gals! </div>
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  • I agree with MUNI. I kind of feel that if you're even somewhat in contact with them, it's always nicer to extend an invitation and have them decline due to travel or what have you, than maybe have them find out they were left out. In groups, I always err on the safe side.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_would-this-be-weird?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:f85c319c-5b88-46ca-8ad4-d4066edbe988Post:484852a8-571c-46e4-be54-6ccb41b0707d">Re: Would this be weird?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Would this be weird? : One, yes. The other one we'd have to track down so probably a no on him.  Thanks for the input gals! 
    Posted by willywally5[/QUOTE]

    <div>If it's a 6 and one kind of thing I'd just go ahead and invite all 7, I'd hate to be the odd man out.</div>
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_would-this-be-weird?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:f85c319c-5b88-46ca-8ad4-d4066edbe988Post:01f1e1af-ccde-4770-89be-abfbf737ac2e">Re: Would this be weird?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Would this be weird? : If it's a 6 and one kind of thing I'd just go ahead and invite all 7, I'd hate to be the odd man out.
    Posted by Megbo2012[/QUOTE]

    <div>Yes, that would suck. And they all do keep in touch with each other. In fact, one who is good friends with DD and her FI is getting married a couple weeks later and we are invited to that. It'd be way awkward if we saw the seventh one there. Will do all seven. I am sure the address can be easily obtained. </div>
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  • It sounds like you're still social with most of them, so I wouldn't think twice about inviting them.
  • I would totatlly invite all of them.  They've earned it.  They gave your family a precious gift.
  • I would invite them all. If they played a significant role in your lives and you are still in touch with them then I don't see the harm. And I think adding a sentimental note in the invites would be nice too.

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