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Wedding shower invite received. Confused on RSVP/Regrets.

So, I got my FSIL's shower invite.  Unfortunately, we will be out of town. 

It says, Please join us <Date /> <Place> <Address> Then lists the hostesses. 

The bottom line is Regrets.  Then some numbers. 

I hate calling strangers.  I'm assuming if I don't call they will assume I am coming since there is nothing about RSVP's?  Will I have to call to say I am not coming?
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Re: Wedding shower invite received. Confused on RSVP/Regrets.

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    It is always good to rsvp either yes or no. We had people not RSVP to my shower and the hostess was going crazy because some people showed up that did not call and some people did not reply at all.
    And I had to call strangers about a baby shower I had to decline. I think email and text messaging has made us phone-a-phobes!
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    If the invitations says "regrets only" and the phone number, you only have to reply if you are NOT planning on attending.

    hth
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    gah, I hate when they do that, especially since so many times now the guest list is incredibly varied and many people don't know each other.  Calling someone I don't know is definitely anxiety inducing, so I feel your pain.  Unfortunately, you do need to call and let them know.
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    You should call them regardless of your ability to attend. If talking to strangers makes you nervous, you might try calling in the middle of the day and hope that you get their voicemail and just say your name and that you can't make FSIL's shower.
    image
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    Lisa50Lisa50 member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    Yes, you should call to say you do not plan to attend.  Soon.
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    New MILNew MIL member
    First Comment
    Call during a time that you think they won't be able to answer the phone and leave a message :) if that helps with your anxiety.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wedding-shower-invite-received-confused-rsvpregrets?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:f92a8ba4-7527-4370-92d4-5f2c9850074ePost:d50592ac-6b16-4ff5-95a0-64a58a040cfb">Re: Wedding shower invite received. Confused on RSVP/Regrets.</a>:
    [QUOTE]Call during a time that you think they won't be able to answer the phone and leave a message :) if that helps with your anxiety.
    Posted by New MIL[/QUOTE]

    <div>This!</div>
    imageDaisypath Wedding tickers
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    I'm sorry, but you are an adult.  Just call the number and be done with it.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
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    Put your big girl panties on and make the call.  :)  It's not a big deal.  
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    Calling strangers is something we have to deal with in life. When you have a question about your insurance or want to make an appt with a new doc, you are calling strangers, no? These things are unavoidable. If you can't make it (and I would call even if you CAN personally), just call the number. I have had to do this many times. If you are that uncomfortable and you think it's a home number, call during a weekday when they may be at work and leave a message.


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    Vacation
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wedding-shower-invite-received-confused-rsvpregrets?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:f92a8ba4-7527-4370-92d4-5f2c9850074ePost:60db4161-8f27-4024-bf23-4e9738c39bc9">Re: Wedding shower invite received. Confused on RSVP/Regrets.</a>:
    [QUOTE]Put your big girl panties on and make the call.  :)  It's not a big deal.  
    Posted by bmoruzzi@hotmail.com[/QUOTE]

    <div>Amen. It's a phone call.. don't sweat it. </div>
    image
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    I agree with the posters who said to suck it up and call :)  You will be expecting people to go through this uncomfrtable routine for you in a couple of months, I assume, so it's good to reciprocate.  As you will find out when you are waiting for your wedding RSVPs, there are few things more annoying in the wedding planning process than people who don't have the manners to RSVP appropriately. 
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    Has strapped the big-girl panties on, and is ready to dial!

    It just makes more sense to me to have people call to RSVP.
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    mica178mica178 member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment
    I co-hosted a shower once and allowed the other hostess to write the invitations.  She did that stupid RSVP with regrets thing, and used me as the contact.  One-third of the list didn't respond, so I had to consider them as attending.  Guess who bought twice as much cake as she needed?

    OP -- I'm glad that you're calling with your RSVP.  Honestly, it's easiest for everyone to hear a yes or no from every guest rather than the passive RSVP with regrets only.  I'll never make that RSVP option choice again.
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